Can I sit at the campfire?

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Gauche

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Hello everyone, I'm Gauche, in life as well as in name. I'm male, I'm 42, and I live near Madison, WI.

I usually gravitate to this type of website when I'm feeling particularly down, look around for a bit and then move on when my mood improves. I hope I can stick around here longer this time, because i really need people like those on this site to talk to. It seems like every social group has it's forum for gathering, whether in real life or online, except for those who suffer social anxieties, so it's nice to find a forum like this. I have to say, that as much as I'd like others to find my socially backward personality more attractive, I have a very hard time finding other socially inhibited people to be interesting or attractive. I don't know how I can love myself when I find it hard to love those who are the most like me. I'm hoping that perhaps this place can provide me with some insight and encouragement, and I'd like nothing more than to be able to offer the same to another.

If there's anything I've learned, it's that we are all so very different, as much as we might identify ourselves as shy, social phobic, or depressed. Many of my friends have similar personalities to mine, shy, quiet, nervous, but for whatever reason they seem comfortable in their own skin. I'm quite the opposite, an extrovert imprisoned by anxiety, someone who wants to live life to the fullest, to dance to the beat of life without fear of what anyone else might think. Who I am inside is not who those around me see or know and nothing could be more soul-crushing in my mind.

I love nothing more than debate and intelligent discussion...let's get it on! :D
 
Welcome.
I'm new also.

As an extrovert, it's really difficult being lonely (in my experience). It goes so against my nature.
 
Of course you can come sit by the campfire, as long as you bring marshmallows. :D Welcome to the site.

 
Sci-Fi said:
Of course you can come sit by the campfire, as long as you bring marshmallows. :D Welcome to the site.

You have to crack a nut to get to the good stuff! I'll bring marshmallows AND hot dogs! Unless you're vegan, then I'll bring Boca brats! Thanks for the welcome....
 
Hi. There's lots of people here of various types, some more outgoing than others. Maybe you'll find some that you do find interesting?
 
I'm sure I will I'm Fine, actually I already have. I shouldn't make such blanket statements but it's hard not to in such a short intro. I meant that when I encounter shy/quiet people I can see why I have such a hard time meeting people. I think to myself, "is that what I act like around people? No wonder they seem to find me uninteresting." The majority of my friends have personalities similar to mine (birds of a feather), but sometimes they can be a pain in the backside. One of my oldest friends I can hardly bear to be around anymore because he is unable to come out of his shell even around me after we've been friends for more than 25 years. That's what I mean about finding people like me uninteresting, I know they really are, just like I know I am, but if we refuse to let people in, it's hard for them to find a reason to befriend us.

I said:
Hi. There's lots of people here of various types, some more outgoing than others. Maybe you'll find some that you do find interesting?

 
Darn it, sci-fi, that's what I was going to say. I was totally going to insist on marshmallows in order to sit at the fire. Fine. FINE.

Got wieners?
 
Gauche said:
I'm sure I will I'm Fine, actually I already have. I shouldn't make such blanket statements but it's hard not to in such a short intro. I meant that when I encounter shy/quiet people I can see why I have such a hard time meeting people. I think to myself, "is that what I act like around people? No wonder they seem to find me uninteresting." The majority of my friends have personalities similar to mine (birds of a feather), but sometimes they can be a pain in the backside. One of my oldest friends I can hardly bear to be around anymore because he is unable to come out of his shell even around me after we've been friends for more than 25 years. That's what I mean about finding people like me uninteresting, I know they really are, just like I know I am, but if we refuse to let people in, it's hard for them to find a reason to befriend us.

I know what you mean. I think it can be easier to open up on an anonymous forum like this than face to face with someone you know (and that you know will see you day after day etc etc). Does that make sense?
 
It absolutely makes sense, and I think that most of us who have found our way here, are at the point where we really need someone to open up to.

I said:
I know what you mean. I think it can be easier to open up on an anonymous forum like this than face to face with someone you know (and that you know will see you day after day etc etc). Does that make sense?

 
Well take a gander, if you haven't already, make yourself at home and open up - either publically to get multiple inputs or privately with someone you feel a connection with (assuming they're open to it, of course, but there's several people who've put open invites out there).

Good luck.
 

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