Going behind peoples backs (backstabbing)

I think that backstabbing is quite common, specially in the work place with people looking for promotion etc....
What would you do if you thought that someone was going behind your back and really giving you a hard time, but you couldn't prove it?

id leave it alone. its their time. not mine

I don't see how you could do anything about it if you can't prove that they're backstabbing you, other than maybe crying into a pillow at night - which is probably what I would do.

Interesting thread, cos when I saw the title I got a little pissed (not at you blue sky)..lol.
I've had people backstab me and then later tell it to my face which was double the pain but they told me so I could get pissed at them for what they did.

Which then later made me learn a huge lesson, that is not to give a heck what others think or what they wanna do, I just lived my life in loneliness. It was horrible cos they were my so called new friends when school started out so when they did that, I had no friends left. Was pretty much alone but I kept going on strong then and later years, they came back to me wanting to continue being friends until today. I'm a forgiving person, so we're all good.

So, just don't care.

People who backstab do it to boost their self esteem. they have to step on other people to feel good about themselves...Next time just take it as a compliment anytime someone backs stabs you, they're just trying to hurt you...Maybe they're trying to lower you cause they're jealous or just wanna hurt someone to make their own hurt go away. People are crazy like that. I see it everyday. What i don't understand is how come people never learn form it. No one would want to be backstabbed, yet they do it to other people and it makes it okay...Ya it sucks.

NewBirth said:

id leave it alone. its their time. not mine

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That is a very good answer. eser said then done tho. But I think if you could be that cool about it then you would be the one looking good in the end.

I agree Blue Sky there is noting weirs then backstabbers. Two faced ppl are realy one thing that do my head in.

Next time I think someones doing that to me am going to take newbirths advis

I agree with simply leaving it alone. If people want to be asses and backstab me, then they can backstab me, but I would never allow myself to sink to their level, no matter what. They'll have to live with that on their conciousness for the rest of their life. Perhaps they don't care at all, perhaps it's eating them inside? I certainly wouldn't care about them.

There are some people I respect, and some people I don't. Backstabbers doesn't even make it on the list. What happened to honesty?

honesty? wuzzat?

Jeremi said:

What happened to honesty?

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It's overrated.

mink said:

Jeremi said:

What happened to honesty?

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It's overrated.

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A lot of ppl would agree with that

But I do get the impression that your a honest kinder person

Lol thanks honest kinder person? Maybe that's what landed me here in this state. Too honest, too kind, not good.

We will forever have these types of people whether it be in school or on a job or even in our family. Now what can we do about it. Good advice leave it alone. Just remember it is their problem and not yours. I truly believe in the long run good always wins over evil. But, best advice I can give if you have done something you might be a bit ashamed of, do not share it. If you share it then that best friend could be a SECRET backstabber. Something else works is to just bring it out in the open if you can as though it is hilarious: need some skill to pull this off lol. I will always remember a best friend who seemed cold to me for a few days for no apparent reason. Then right out of the blue a girlfriend she had been hanging out with said in front of a crowd. "But, I like her, Ann" This was my clue that my dear little friend Ann had been backstabbing me. I kept quiet, but never got in touch with her after we got out of school even though saw her husband and he advised she was really lonely and having a hard time. I may be lonely at times but my choice of friends will be good people, and I am a good friend.

mountaingirl said:

We will forever have these types of people whether it be in school or on a job or even in our family. Now what can we do about it. Good advice leave it alone. Just remember it is their problem and not yours. I truly believe in the long run good always wins over evil. But, best advice I can give if you have done something you might be a bit ashamed of, do not share it. If you share it then that best friend could be a SECRET backstabber.

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*nods nods nods*

mountaingirl said:

I may be lonely at times but my choice of friends will be good people, and I am a good friend.

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Good for you!

I would ignore the person. Its not worth wasting your breath.

mountaingirl said:

We will Just remember it is their problem and not yours.

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Well that's the part that I have trouble dealing with. Yes it is their problem, but you are their problem, so therefore it does concern you. doesn't it? Hope that's not to confusing.

mink said:

Lol thanks honest kinder person? Maybe that's what landed me here in this state. Too honest, too kind, not good.

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I use to think that to be realy honest with friends was a good thing. But I fined to often that if your honest even when asked to be that, that is not what they wont and well often holed it against you.

I am finding my self keeping things to myself moor and moor just latly with the ppl around me out of fear that I well end up even moor isolated then I already am.

Yeah me too, the keeping to myself part but not sure if it's for the same reasons lol. But really, when you're too honest and too kind, sometimes they just take advantage of you.