Lost Purpose in Life....Someone listen please.

I came here to vent out all of my emotions, stress, sadness, everything of how im feeling at the moment....So here I go...Hopefully someone will listen.

My whole years of high school has shapen up the person I am today...A depressed cold sad and heartless person who has nothing to look forward to life anymore. As much as I try to get my mind off things, be positive, try to at least have hope, and somewhat confidence...It always...ALWAYS backfires.

Personally, I have no time for love in my heart anymore...I refuse to be with someone who has more than me, I'm a high school graduate, I've been looking for a job for almost a year, I've been accepted to a private college that I declined because I couldnt afford it...Now im at a technical College that i never wanted to go to,Now im stuck with taking more classes than needed which is holding me back,Relationships sucks,Financial status suck major ass, I have no car, Me and my mother constantly argue now becase of these facts, and $3.00 in my bank acount....Everyones doors are opening accept for mines,everyone Going off to college, working making money, or going into the military...Which I all wanted...But i have none...And I can't take it anymore...I used to drink and smoke the pain away but i had to stop that habit...Music and writing became my way of easing my pain. I seriously don't want to be here anymore, Im sick of internally crying, and I contemplate more and more eachday without anycare.

I dn't wana be shy, lacking confidence, I can't seem to talk to people (be social) or feel happy, I've lost interest in things that I use to love doing, and i speak softly which is natural...Sometimes i wish I could stop wishing...An just change....People tell me not to change...But I am...into a bitter and melocholy person who rarely smile anymore because i have nothing to smile about...Slowly but surely im losing my personality...My beliefs of everything have lacked and almost fading away...All the dreams that i wanted to accomplished are never going to happen...I honestly think its bad luck. IDK....I jus want it to end. This depression, headaches, sadness, pain, torture, tears, heartaches, etc....To End.

I Honestly don't know what to do anymore...I only have doubts. I can't feel any emotion anymore...Everything is neutral and im nonchalant....Im jus tired of life right now...

Welcome aboard the Depression Train!

Yes, I know life becomes dull and boring. I've felt that a lot of times. Sometimes you feel worthless, sometimes hopeless, sometimes numb. Your depression is affecting your studies, you should finish that first. Once you get a degree things will be a ton easier.

Yes, I want our pain to end as well. The only way on doing it is moving forward.

Patience, things will be better.

If I was in your situation, I'll focus on one area of difficulty at a time and try to resolve it to my satisfaction. Right now, you need to gain some confidence in yourself before you can do much else.

True...But I'm tryin this "positivity/confidence//Patience" thing...and its hard to maintain...*sigh* Is so hard.

Have you tried professional mental health counseling?

There is no "magic" answer. Life is just one step at a time. We all see and feel things differently. Some people will just never understand the type of pain some of us feel all the time. But you can get through it if you keep moving forward one step at a time. Try not to focus too far ahead, or on too many things at once. Just take it one step at a time. All you have is right now, so don't worry about things down the road or things that you simply can't change. Focus on what you can do and what you can change. What I had to face was the fact I can't control a lot of what happens in my life, especially the choices of other people. But I can control how I react to them. I know it's easier said than done, but if what you're doing now isn't working for you, try something else. Make a decision to look at things differently. Life will always have pain, but you can learn from it and use it to help others as well as yourself. Life has some pretty good things, too, my friend, so please just keep moving forward.

bootlegspm said:

There is no "magic" answer. Life is just one step at a time. We all see and feel things differently. Some people will just never understand the type of pain some of us feel all the time. But you can get through it if you keep moving forward one step at a time. Try not to focus too far ahead, or on too many things at once. Just take it one step at a time. All you have is right now, so don't worry about things down the road or things that you simply can't change. Focus on what you can do and what you can change. What I had to face was the fact I can't control a lot of what happens in my life, especially the choices of other people. But I can control how I react to them. I know it's easier said than done, but if what you're doing now isn't working for you, try something else. Make a decision to look at things differently. Life will always have pain, but you can learn from it and use it to help others as well as yourself. Life has some pretty good things, too, my friend, so please just keep moving forward.

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Wow, ....This really helped me alot/ Encouragement Is what I need now...And I am looking at things in a different way...decision wise, everything. Thank you alot.

SophiaGrace said:

Have you tried professional mental health counseling?

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Trust me...Im pretty sure those A-holes can't help me by paying them a s*$tload of money...Never. 8-/

ConflictedSoul93 said:

Trust me...Im pretty sure those A-holes can't help me by paying them a s*$tload of money...Never. 8-/

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Could a teacher help you learn a subject? Could a doctor help you with a medical condition? Do you believe that your issues are completely immune to understanding and resolution by a trained professional?