R
ragamuffin
Guest
my ex (best friend forever and lover for four years) suddenly cut me off a while ago, for no reason, and occasionally phoned me when he was drunk and told me he loved me and missed me etc etc ...
but when i'd try and get in contact with him he'd just blank me.
i thought i was coping ok without him.
he's telling people that he doesn't know who i am, and he's never known me.
i saw him today kissing a girl i'd never seen before.
and i just went completely numb.
i've been hanging on for months to the hope that we might be friends again.
and it was like realisation that i really don't exist to him, and i don't understand why.
we were best friends more than anything.
and it hurts.
i went through all that rejection and confusion and depression for months because of him and it's just like... i didn't even get an explanation or an apology or anything from him and now i just i don't know.
it feels like i'm going to throw up, like it hurts too much to cry, it's a deeper kind of more physical pain.
and i want to hate him.
but when i'd try and get in contact with him he'd just blank me.
i thought i was coping ok without him.
he's telling people that he doesn't know who i am, and he's never known me.
i saw him today kissing a girl i'd never seen before.
and i just went completely numb.
i've been hanging on for months to the hope that we might be friends again.
and it was like realisation that i really don't exist to him, and i don't understand why.
we were best friends more than anything.
and it hurts.
i went through all that rejection and confusion and depression for months because of him and it's just like... i didn't even get an explanation or an apology or anything from him and now i just i don't know.
it feels like i'm going to throw up, like it hurts too much to cry, it's a deeper kind of more physical pain.
and i want to hate him.