My extensive rant on men, relationships, dating, biology, koalas and whatever

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Equinox

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OH MY GOD!

I can't BELIEVE have EASY men have it when it comes to dating! Like, srsly! ANY guy can make a profile on a dating site, and even if he's, like 573 lbs and missing a leg, and his hamster just died, he'll STILL get over 50 messages within half an hour! Srsly, I once made a fake male profile, and that totally happened! Besides, no man I've ever actually MET in real life has told me that he's never had a girlfriend, only online, so that makes it IMPOSSIBLE to even consider that some men could be struggling, just as women do. OF COURSE any random man I encounter on the street, in a pub, at work or whatever is going to walk up to me and say "Hi, I have trouble finding a date and I've never had a girlfriend", just like that, because that wouldn't be embarrassing it ALL.

I'm sooooo lonely, and even though I send out LOADS of messages on dating sites, and I've approached men in real life, I never get a response, and they just look at me like I'm some alien creature that just landed planet Eart. Of course this has absolutely NOTHING to do with how I present myself, how I talk to them, what I write in my messages or in my profile, it's EVERYBODY ELSE's fault, and by that I mean the MEN. Men are soooo shallow, they'll only ever approach a pretty girl, and they'll only respond to messages on a dating site from girls with pretty pictures wearing a slutty top.

It's unfair that relationships are so EASY for men, while I'm forced to sit home alone and complain about this, completely against my will! I've done absolutely EVERYTHING I can, but men are just too shallow to get what an amazing, caring, funny and giving girl I am. Even the UGLY men will only approach the pretty girls. I'm willing to date ANY man, I don't mind if he's in wheelchair, wrestling an anaconda, singing Swedish folk tunes from the 80's and covered in spots, I don't care, I'm soooo lonely and frustrated, but noooo, the men are conspiring against me and the system is rigged and I'm supposed to just wait to be asked out, and when I get tired of waiting and ask out a guy myself he freaks out because it threatens his "manhood" or whatever and rejects me. Because there's absolutely NO CHANCE there could be anything about ME that he finds offputting. WHAT IN THE WORLD WOULD THAT BE? I'm so **** perfect and all men are shallow jerks who just want to be with the hottest chicks. And they all just want tall blondes.

Of course NO man will ever admit this. They'll keep denying this because they are MEN, but I know better, being the reflected and highly evolved woman that I am. I've seen through their little "games" and I KNOW what they think, how they feel and what they really want. All men are the same, or at least most of them, and they only care about looks. THIS IS TRUE BECAUSE I SAY SO!

AND WHY ARE THERE NO KOALAS??!
 
I already told you: The koala is a lie.

There are no koalas because MEN made them up. They know girls like cute and cuddly things. It isn't enough for them to ALWAYS get TONS of women. Nooo. They wanted us to suffer even more. They wanted us to adore something cute and cuddly that we would think was real, but really, it wasn't! So, they created the Koala! I mean, how could something that gray with a nose like an upside down spoon, that would eat eucalyptus leaves (for crying out loud) really exist? Newp. They made it up.
 
They TOTALLY made it up. Just like they make up everything they say. This one time, a guy claimed that he had "won" an argument, just because I left the discussion after realizing he'd never stop spamming his narrow minded opinions without understanding what other people were telling him. It made me laugh, then I felt sorry for him, then I realized he's just like all other MEN out there and went back to ignoring him.

And have you ever noticed how men just sort of make up their own words and terms? Suddenly, in the middle of a conversation, they'll get so upset because I say "the grass is green", and later on I realize that's because they think that "green" means "lilac". No wonder it's impossible to communicate with them!
 
Oh god, and with Skåne dialect! He sings like an injured seagull. The horrors! The worst thing is, I bet even THAT guy can get a girlfriend. Life is SO unfair! :( :( :(
 
There is a mathematical way to prove that while females are evil, men are more evil.

evilmen.jpg
 
Equinox said:
Oh god, and with Skåne dialect! He sings like an injured seagull. The horrors! The worst thing is, I bet even THAT guy can get a girlfriend. Life is SO unfair! :( :( :(

Ofcourse he can, he's an ANDROID, such an awesome dude! :cool:

<3 SPOCK

And yes, lol at Skåne dialect :D
 
everybody is missing the point.

(and yes, i get that this thread is a joke, i kinda laughed at it too)

the point is this:

- shy women have an easier time because guys are more likely approach a shy girl than vice versa
- outgoing men have an easier time because they exude charm and all the ladies flock to them, and NOT vice versa, actually some men are terrified of outgoing women.

just marinate on that for a minute.

each gender has it's issues and strengths in the world of dating/mating

so shy men have it harder than shy women

and

outgoing women have it harder than outgoing men
 
[video=youtube]

All of the men in the commercial above do all of these crazy things, but they STILL HAVE WOMEN. If the genders had been switched, the men would have left the women.


And just look at this video. All this guy has to do is put on a little cheap Axe product and these women are swarming like a horde of zombies! I've got some really nice perfume that costs $70 a bottle, but I don't even get one guy.

[video=youtube]

 
Equinox said:
OH MY GOD!
...
AND WHY ARE THERE NO KOALAS??!

I'm *finally* laughing about this whole thing! (I'm the "bitter" old single woman from the "other" thread that I gave up on somewhere around p13...) Funny coincidence here, my mum is going to Australia next month, maybe I'll ask her to hunt down a koala...

btw, I kind of alluded to what would happen over there when I said "it only takes one crackpot to open the floodgates"...I've made the mistake of sharing this forum on my facebook page more than once, well I'm gonna stop doing that pronto, that's all I need is for one of my friends to stumble on that thread and say "why are you linking to such an ugly forum?"

 
Why thank you for the ad hominem aimed toward the entire forum.
 
Pheenix said:
Why thank you for the ad hominem aimed toward the entire forum.

Because if that just happens to be the *only* thread they decide to read, that's exactly what they're going to think.
 
dk1967 said:
Because if that just happens to be the *only* thread they decide to read, that's exactly what they're going to think.

Quick fix: Post link to other, better threads. :)
 
dk1967 said:
Pheenix said:
Why thank you for the ad hominem aimed toward the entire forum.

Because if that just happens to be the *only* thread they decide to read, that's exactly what they're going to think.

I beg to differ.

 
Badjedidude said:
dk1967 said:
Because if that just happens to be the *only* thread they decide to read, that's exactly what they're going to think.

Quick fix: Post link to other, better threads. :)

That thread is right there on the front page in the "last post" column...
I first clicked on it because I was expecting something humorous (as a "rant" is usually meant to be)...
More than once I've told friends having problems or needing advice "just go to this site..." Nope, don't think I'll be doing that again.
 

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