Hi!, I am new here, just registered.. I don't really know where to begin, I am a 17 year old girl from sweden. I have been depressed for many years on and off. It all started when i was around 12-13 and since then alot has changed i have grown up obviously, lost all the friends i had. I have one friend now but we are not very alike but she tries so i appreciate that a lot. I am a very insecure person who always assume people have the worst intentions, i am really bad at small talk and making conversation.. i mean even online i dont even know what to say to people. And i always assume i bother people. I daydream.. or i live a life in my head. If that makes sense every quiet moment i have i live in this imaginary world i have created. So that's when i am the happiest when i get left alone to dream. But when reality hits me.. Like my situation and how lonely the real life actually is.. i don't know what to .. I have lately started to think about death a lot.I don't want to die but it feels often that it would be the only way out. There is a lot more to my story then this but i didn't want to make it to long.