Choosing loneliness?

Do you ever wonder if you choose being lonely? cause when i think about it there are so many chances that i have missed out and people i have let down cause maybe i was depressed or i felt like i didn't belong with them or.. i know it probably sounds silly and it makes me sound very shallow but i often feel that having friends and a social life really is not worth if your friends are not like-minded people.. I rather spend my time alone doing something i enjoy then being with people just cause..

What i am trying to say is i understand that there are people out there who are genuinely lonely and it is not a choice and you have tried to make friends but have not been able to but then there is people like me. Who often rather stay in, read a book, watch a movie, listen to music, daydream.. i daydream so much that my standards is getting to high, it is awful and i wish it would go away.. Whenever i am around real people i get so disappointed and i just wanna go back to my head where everything and everybody is perfect. Or maybe my friends are out there somewhere? And sometimes i think maybe some are not meant to have friends..

I sympathize alot with you. Whenever I am out amongst humanity I am dismayed, I feel I don't belong. All everyone wants to do is distract themselves permanently from the horrible Darwinist society we built, to take up some vice to advance in this direction and that is about as far they go in life. When I am with people I often feel the worst loneliness, the loneliness of alienation, of feeling you don't belong anywhere. If I am alone, alone I often get morose desperate feeling that nothing is capable of changing, that I will die without meeting anyone I much wanted to be around. So instead of having courage to find true support I continue just hanging out with the same few people whom I am just comfortable with, but know I can never count on them. On the contrary they always depend on me for favors or help, but I cannot ever rely on them.

I think to adjust yourself to this society's paradigm you have to be absent-minded, vapid, selfish and hedonistic, in other words a bad person of sorts. If you notice, everyone who has something worth saying since the Industrial Revolution, the great writers, they all tend to suffer deep irreparable wounds. You look at all the greats like Kafka, Dostoevsky, Camus, Bukowski, Faulkner, Tolstoy, Dickens, Kostas Karyotakis, Byron, Orwell, Hemingway, etc. they all suffered wounds from the world they lived in. The people who can just on the contrary find happiness so easy, they may have a better quality of life, but they have nothing much to say to us other than their ability to adjust and thrive in the inhumane circumstances.

Hi. I was just going to say that if you choose to be alone is that loneliness? Isn't loneliness longing for company/companionship? just askin...

Thrasymachus said:

I sympathize alot with you. Whenever I am out amongst humanity I am dismayed, I feel I don't belong. All everyone wants to do is distract themselves permanently from the horrible Darwinist society we built, to take up some vice to advance in this direction and that is about as far they go in life. When I am with people I often feel the worst loneliness, the loneliness of alienation, of feeling you don't belong anywhere. If I am alone, alone I often get morose feeling desperately nothing is capable of changing, that I will die without meeting anyone I much wanted to be around. ...

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I don't think will change. It's the human condition....

I think to adjust yourself to this society's paradigm you have to be absent-minded, vapid, selfish and hedonistic, in other words a bad person of sorts. If you notice, everyone who has something worth saying since the Industrial Revolution, the great writers, they all tend to suffer deep irreparable wounds. You look at all the greats like Kafka, Dostoevsky, Camus, Bukowski, Faulkner, Tolstoy, Dickens, Kostas Karyotakis, Byron, Orwell, Hemingway, etc. they all suffered wounds from the world they lived in. The people who can just on the contrary find happiness so easy, may have a better quality of life, but they have nothing much to say to us other than their ability to adjust and thrive in the inhumane circumstances.
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I have put many years of thought and consideration into what you're saying. There are two kinds of people, I think. One kind can see the world as they want it to be and fit themselves into a comfortable paradigm. The other kind, for some quirk of genetics, live in the real world and cannot escape into a fabricated reality. Those famous people you mention saw things as they are. True reality is disturbing, frightening, and confusing. This is my conclusion, at least.

I'm not a christian and do not put faith into the bible but there is an analogy there, sheep and goats. I think it's there for a purpose. Whoever wrote the text understood very well. Sheep are good. Goats are bad. We goats, we who see through bullshit, are a threat to the status quo created by those who rule in the artificial reality. Sheep, however, follow right along, take the 'shepherd's' word, and somehow choose not to see reality.

Off subject, I know, but your post, Thrasymachus, rang a bell. Interesting user name. I Googled it. Are you a philosopher?

Thrasymachus said:

Whenever I am out amongst humanity I am dismayed, I feel I don't belong.

I think to adjust yourself to this society's paradigm you have to be absent-minded, vapid, selfish and hedonistic, in other words a bad person of sorts.

The people who can just on the contrary find happiness so easy, they may have a better quality of life, but they have nothing much to say to us other than their ability to adjust and thrive in the inhumane circumstances.

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These three statements I have quoted are what I agree with most from your post. Couldn't have said the second one better myself.


And Ted I really like your goat:sheep analogy.

Mrsme I don't see how you would feel shallow if you are choosing not to force an interaction. What I'm getting from Thrasymachus and Tedgresham are that there are two basic types of people.

Those who have chosen to take part in something they don't fully agree with but want to fit in and those who refuse to assimilate.

If you choose not to participate because you can't relate or feel forsaken aren't you just making the logical decision to continue to think and act as you wish? And therefore maintaining your personal beliefs and integrity?

Loneliness isn't just physical, it can be emotional and intellectual as well.

FunkyBuddha said:

Thrasymachus said:

Whenever I am out amongst humanity I am dismayed, I feel I don't belong.

I think to adjust yourself to this society's paradigm you have to be absent-minded, vapid, selfish and hedonistic, in other words a bad person of sorts.

The people who can just on the contrary find happiness so easy, they may have a better quality of life, but they have nothing much to say to us other than their ability to adjust and thrive in the inhumane circumstances.

Click to expand...

These three statements I have quoted are what I agree with most from your post. Couldn't have said the second one better myself.


And Ted I really like your goat:sheep analogy.

Mrsme I don't see how you would feel shallow if you are choosing not to force an interaction. What I'm getting from Thrasymachus and Tedgresham are that there are two basic types of people.

Those who have chosen to take part in something they don't fully agree with but want to fit in and those who refuse to assimilate.

If you choose not to participate because you can't relate or feel forsaken aren't you just making the logical decision to continue to think and act as you wish? And therefore maintaining your personal beliefs and integrity?

Loneliness isn't just physical, it can be emotional and intellectual as well.

Click to expand...

Yes, thank you.. it is just hard for me i think to accept that, I think i am being stupid for not wanting some people but i guess i am just following my heart and doing what feels right.. It is difficult tho, when you realize you refuse to conform or be just because. But it feels right, that is what i know for certain right now.