I *have* everything, yet can't bring myself to care..help!

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Madame20s

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Hey :) First post here, this might get long, but it's something I feel I need to discuss with someone. If you have a similar problem we can totally talk about it.

First off, let me start with the fact I'm in my early-mid twenties. I don't know if it's just a part of growing up, but seriously, I'm getting SO darn bored with absolutely everything. I don't have a psychological issue (I'm not depressed or anything), I have a healthy self-esteem, I'm seeing a hot guy, I'm pretty and frequently told so and I'm happy with myself, I'm financially well off, I've travelled a lot in my life and I have a loving mother and my own apartment. I lived abroad and I've seen a lot. I have a handful of great friends and blessed to be creative enough to be good at art.. it's also something I enjoy doing.

*however*, I just can't shake the feeling of being bored almost all the time, even if it's doing something I enjoy, it seems like I just don't give a honeysuckle, it all feels like *been there, done that, bought the t-shirt* to me, even when I try new things (and I lead a very active life, I do stuff all the time) I'm just getting the feeling of even the new just feeling old, old, old, and I don't know what to do about it. I really don't know what direction I could take in life that could lift this feeling, I feel like doing something kind of radical, just leaving for somewhere on the other end of the world and start over, everything being completely different. Though it's probably just an excuse, and that will get "boring" too, after I do it. I remember even a year back, certain things could still excite me, and I'd get giddy thinking about them. Nowadays I'm just so *meh* about absolutely everything. :(

(And before you guys go err spoilt ***** etc etc seriously, I count my blessings and thank the Lord SO OFTEN for all I was given, I'm a very charitable person an I do A LOT of voluntary work and devote quite a bit of my time helping those less fortunate) but still. Nothing feels right somehow, even if I'm having fun. I wonder if that's a sign from the Lord that He wants me to turn to religion more and focus on what's *really* important. I don't know. I mean I'm really liking the idea of just getting more religious and starting a family with a religious guy but I'm real scared it would just feel the same way everything else does to me now.
 
Do you really have a healthy self-esteem? Everything you have, are, & were comes from your parents efforts in life, doesn't it? Perhaps this is why things have gotten so "meh". Nothing you've experienced is really your own.
 
Well, you need to find something that /is/ a challenge for you and overcome it, whatever it is.
 
Sprint said:
Do you really have a healthy self-esteem? Everything you have, are, & were comes from your parents efforts in life, doesn't it? Perhaps this is why things have gotten so "meh". Nothing you've experienced is really your own.

Thanks so much for replying, that's a really good thought, the more I think about it, the truer it rings. You're absolutely right about the parents thing, sometimes I feel like I've become a hybrid of my mom and dad (I mean, I think it's a good thing because I love and respect them both) but you're right when you say it's not *me* and *my life* and *my achievements*, it's just living someone elses plan for me.

You're right about the self-esteem thing too, it just occurred to me that the only thing I'm really wanting for myself that I discovered for myself I'm too scared to go out and do, or tell anyone, because I fear rejection or I fear I won't have the stamina to pull through with it, or to take it as seriously as it merits being taken. ****. Thank you so much, I honestly wasn't expecting much but your reply set off some real valuable thoughts. Thank you, really. I'm feeling more and more that pursuing my own, independent dream may really be my only salvation.



IgnoredOne said:
Well, you need to find something that /is/ a challenge for you and overcome it, whatever it is.

Read my reply to Sprint above, that goes for you too, seems you two were thinking along the same lines. I agree, you're dead-on. Thank you so much, too. :)
 

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