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What do you think about suicide?
#91
It's something I've thought about. Often. But never done. Mostly because of my daughter. i don't feel I have the right to put her through the guilt she'd feel if I did that.

Also, at the back of my head, is the feeling that - given my luck - I'd probably just have to start my life all over again until I got all the way through it. I REALLY don't want to have to do that.

Not sure if any of that helps you but there are certainly plenty of people here who know the feeling. Well.
I'm an Optimistic Pessimist. I'm absolutely POSITIVE that it's all going to go horribly wrong...

Marge: I'm not afraid
Grampa: Then you're not paying close enough attention
(from episode entitled 'Strong Arms of the Ma')
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#92
I think about it daily. Can't help it. It's very alluring. All the pain, sadness, depression goes away. Ur finally free.it's amazing.
[Image: tenor.gif]
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#93
(05-05-2020, 12:30 AM)ahsatan Wrote: I think about it daily. Can't help it. It's very alluring. All the pain, sadness, depression goes away. Ur finally free.it's amazing.

I think about it more often than I'd like, not everyday, but you're right... It's alluring.
Then I think about my dogs. Who would take care of them? And I think about my nieces and nephews. I don't see them often, but we're close enough that that choice would hurt them. I think about the people that would be hurt and even though a part of me says "they'd get over it" or "they don't really care"... the last thing I want to do is hurt someone else, and at least for now that part is bigger than the part of me that wants to escape.

Something I realized far later than I should have, is that if I don't want to hurt others... Why am I so willing to hurt myself? Am I not worth the same consideration?

I don't know the entirety of what you're dealing with, but I hope you don't give in to those thoughts. 
((Hugs))
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#94
I watched a documentary about people who survived a suicide attempt and the ones that survived, they had instant regret the second they jumped.

We will all die eventually, may as well make the best of it while we are still alive.
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