Need a different perspective! On a situation!

I've recently been thinking did I overeact to my families behavior in a particular situation. Here goes about a year ago the grandchildren that I'm raising their mother agreed to pick them up 2 or 3 afternoons that I was in class and not at home to get them off the bus. (she previously had lived in my home but due to her disrespect she couldn't remain). I was expecting a check from christmas savings fund, I never recieved. Found out later that it was mailed and cashed. Long story short she cashed the check, stole and pawned 2 cameras and a camcorder when picking them up. I prosecuted her. But my family (i.e. sister, niece, and a cousin) continues to have contact, none of them ever said anything to her about the incident, not one word. They all felt that since I was a Christian I should forgive and move on. I didn't expect any of them to stop with her contact, but at least tell her that her behavior was unacceptable. They kept telling me you know she has problems, and she's the kids mother, just let it go. No one understood the betrayal and violation I felt. I felt betrayed by them as well. Am I overeacting

Hmm. I'm wondering if she is your daughter or not. Either way she is the mother of your grandchildren. I know you probably care about them and she probably needed the money. It doesn't make it right but maybe it would be easier to forgive her if you think about it that way. Besides betrayal how much damage did it really do to you financially? Parents take care of their children. It is a life long commitment.

kamya said:

Hmm. I'm wondering if she is your daughter or not. Either way she is the mother of your grandchildren. I know you probably care about them and she probably needed the money. It doesn't make it right but maybe it would be easier to forgive her if you think about it that way. Besides betrayal how much damage did it really do to you financially? Parents take care of their children. It is a life long commitment.

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She isn't my daughter. She has never provided for her children. I have since forgiven and harbour no ill feelings. I just choose not to have any contact with her, It's my family that thinks there should be a mending. The stolen money and item was strictly for her. I've been victimized by her way to many times(stolen cash and credit card use). It's time I cut my losses.

You dont have to do anything. If you wish to not have contacts with toxic people in your life, its your chioce and you're
free to do so. You dont have to fix anything.

You dont have to let her back into your life. Lots of people cut peope out of thier lives...even close family members.
Life is like this for alot of people. A lot of people in Al Anon knows how you feel and some of the bullshit you had to
put up with.

Boundaries and not walls, maybe?
It's still relatively your chioce, your terms, your life.

Idk...if there's mendings to be done...if she hurted you and stole from you.
Isnt she the one suppost to clean up her mess?
The last I check...

I'm mending the wreackage I've cuased to someone I love very much.
She's allowing me to do so...She dosnt have too. I know this much.

I don't think you're overreacting IMO. If a family member did that to me, I would feel betrayed too. Like Lonesome Crow, said you're not the one that's supposed to be mending, She is. Also being a Christian does not mean you're supposed to turn a blind eye to certain things and act like everything is fine. If there is problem or issue like this, then you should speak out on it.

I don't know you're family, but they seem to be sweeping this under the rug.

Well if she isn't your daughter and she was using the money for herself then yup I don't think you overreacted either.