Loneliness is healthy/Happiness is unhealthy?

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cumulus.james

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This past year I have all but given up drinking, Started eating healthily, taken up the gym, lost 4 stone and given up smoking. I manged these things because am miserable and when I am depressed I am thinking about the future and how bad things are and how I can change things.

Today I experienced happiness. It has caused me to eat a take away, 2.5 chocolate cakes, some cheap candy, smoke a cigarette and get drunk.

it occurs to me that all those happy people you might see on their way to the clubs and pubs with their friends are going to be drinking and smoking and not really paying attention to their health. And that was me toady. When your happy death seems like something int eh future and nothing to worry about right now because your having a good time - you may cause yourself cancer but that's a bridge you'll cross because at least you can say you lived life to the full right?

When your miserable and alone there are not enough distractions and you are filled with thoughts about how you feel in the present and the horrid things the future might hold.

In short, I dont think I can be happy and healthy. If I am happy I would let my health go.

Anyone else experienced this?

 
Kind of ... in a way.
I feel that in modern western countries, generally speaking we are quite wealthy and we can have what we want and more. That can make us lazy and quite unhealthy. So unhappiness, or not having what we want makes us leaner and healthier.
So I think it is actually a healthy state of mind NOT to want material things too much. Of course that is harder said than done.

p.s. what caused your happiness?
 
Hi! First, congratulations on your changes! This is fantastic! You were able to take action and make the necessary changes to get a better life. Now you have to work at maintaining those healthy changes, so that you can make them permanent ones. It takes time to change bad habits. You can trying to sabotage yourself by drinking and smoking again. It's ok, we all do it. Accept that it can happen occasionally, it does not mean that you can't do it. You can! You have already made the changes! Keep the faith, stay strong and go forward. You need to be supported so come keep posting if you have doubts again.

All the best!!!
 
So you fell back into your old ways to be happy? Making changes in your life is difficult, it doesn't bring instant happiness and reward. It takes time. You seemed to be on a good path, taking control of your life and trying to live a healthier one, even lost weight. Then you slipped and reverted to the old standbys that give you false feelings of happiness.

What you experienced wasn't real happiness, it was educed by drugs and alcohol to make you feel happiness. Once it wears off where will you be then? Picking up another cigaret and drinking more to feel that happiness again?

Sorry if I'm downing on your happiness, I'm just against smoking and drinking, not my bag and I wish everyone would stop smoking. It is so unhealthy.
 
Wine, song and women seem to be the path to happiness. So far, I've experienced none in my life, so I guess there's a reason why I'm such a melancholic sour puss. Still, I haven't been genuinely happy for a long time. I'm satisfied with content. Gotta enjoy the little bits of life, take happiness where you can.
 
I think that if you're genuinely happy, you'll want to stay healthy and sane so that it'll last and you'll be aware of your happiness. I'm pretty satisfied with life and I've been pretty intent on exercise(to feel better), food(so that it'll help me), and sober(no reason to get drunk if I'm not avoiding anything).
 
Thanks for the replies guys

I think I did not get my point across very well (I was drunk). What I was saying is that you stop worrying about such things as weatehr your fat or smoking or drinking when your a happy person. In the uk I can tell you many of the happier people I know of are out smoking, drinking, eating really bad food becuse they 1)Seem to be too busy enjoying themsels and living a good life and 2)just think about the here and now.

If I was happy with myself and happy with my life and had company, people to see and meet and all the rest of it I do not think I would be in the gym for hours or obsessing over weather i get enough broccoli in my meals. I would be down the pub having a pint and smoking and eating burgers because I would be trapped in the moment so to speak. When I used to do all of those things and was a happier person you always think "I will quit smoking tomorrow" or "I must start watching my wight tomorrow" and tomorrow never comes.

I can tell you 100% honestly I would still be super-obese, a smoker and heavy drinker if I had not have lost all my friends and gotten so miserable. In short if your happy you dont care about the lung cancer you might get in 20 years because your convince you'll give up next month or whatever and you tell yourself that every month.
 
I understand, being sad does make one think about what bad things can happen in the future. And there's ALWAYS something that can be worried about.

Of course, an unhealthy lifestyle of obesity and drugs will contribute to depression.
 
sentiententity said:
I understand, being sad does make one think about what bad things can happen in the future. And there's ALWAYS something that can be worried about.

Of course, an unhealthy lifestyle of obesity and drugs will contribute to depression.

Totally, I am drinking now and very depressed. It will take me a good couple of weeks to get back to being OK.

I cant really say that there has been so much difference in being almost thin, fit, healthy and sober to being a great big fat slob drunk all the time. I have not gained anything. I still dont have a friend and can not seem to get anywhere in life. There is defiantly something about me beyond looks or character that makes me unable to connect or engage with the human race.

I keep wishing there was some place to go to give up on modern life - I dont mean die I mean like a camp for the dispossessed or something you could just go and opt out of the modern world and grow your own wheat and raise some chickens all day.
 

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