Your definition of a friend

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Okiedokes

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What is your definition of a friend?

What is it that you expect to receive from that person and how often would you need/want to talk to them? How long is too long?



 
It depends if it's online or irl. Online friendships are highly variable. You could talk to that person once a week, once a month or every few months and still maintain the friendship and be able to pick up where you left off with that person. You don't spend physical time together so there isn't that feeling of "oh geez, I haven't seen you in so long, we need to catch up" after a time apart. I love this flexibility of online relationships. It is especially nice for those of us that have minimal social needs. Online friendships are easy to start. There is no courting process like there is in real life. It's like "hey wanna chat? Okay!"

A real life friendship has higher expectations in my opinion. What many people call friends I might be more likely to call aquaintances. The majority of my friendships have been honest and intense. To me a friend is something of a platonic soul mate. Someone whom you feel a deep connection with or someone who had a profound impact on your life. Often friendships take a while to blossom but I have a habit of having short, intense friendships before we go our different ways (though, almost never because of a falling out). To me a friend is someone you never forget.

This is a great topic btw. Looking forward to hearing the responses.
 
Okiedokes said:
What is your definition of a friend?

What is it that you expect to receive from that person and how often would you need/want to talk to them? How long is too long?

To be brief, in my view, friends are two or more people who associate for the mutual enjoyment and support of each other.

So in a friend I would expect someone who's company I enjoy, who enjoys mine, and whom I would therefore be supportive of, and be supported by when support was needed.

As for how often I would need to talk to this person, or how long, I'm not sure. That tends to a a fluid and spontaneous thing dependent upon circumstances.

 
Someone that you are willing to help make their lives better. Someone who will pick you up when your car dies and you need a lift or help getting it running.
 
Okiedokes said:
What is your definition of a friend?

Someone whom I can trust and someone whose company I enjoy. A person who knows the real me. Not the work me, or 'oh-crap-I'm-going-into-panic-mode' me. Someone who can offer aid in times of need, or ones who receive it from me when they are in dire straits.

Okiedokes said:
What is it that you expect to receive from that person and how often would you need/want to talk to them? How long is too long?

As for talking...hmmh. Depends on the person. I like regular banter, but there's times when you can do without the idle chatter. Still, regular correspondence is generally the key to keeping up the friendship, if it's not possible to meet up in person.

I find, sadly, that I haven't had many true friends in this life. Associates, work buddies, school buddies, internet acquintances and the like, but rarely someone who has stuck around for years, and enjoys my trust and knows who I am. I find that I generally seem to lose touch with people over and over again, despite my efforts. Guess that's why I like dogs so much- they'll love you no matter who you are, and are always loyal.
 
I love this question, my views have changed over the years.

To me a friend is someone who gets you, no matter what your differences. Someone who will listen to you ramble on about the things you like even if they don't share the same interests. Someone who will help pick you up when you are down. Someone who will offer a hug when you need one even when nothing is said. Someone who no matter how long you go between contact is always there to catch up and share where life has brought you.

To me that is a friend.
 
Okiedokes said:
What is your definition of a friend?

What is it that you expect to receive from that person and how often would you need/want to talk to them? How long is too long?

In a true friendship these thing will come naturally. If you want to impose limits on when to talk to them or how long then you have not bonded with that person. If someone is a friend you will look forward to thier company and feel totally yourself around them. If you don't then they are merely an acquaintance. But a person needs to be your acquaintance in order to get to know you well enough to become your friend I guess.
 

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