Self Mutilators Anonymous

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VideoVidiVisum

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About Us
Self Mutilators Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength, and hope with each other, that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from physical self-mutilation.

We use the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous to stop compulsive self-mutilation. We wish to help others to recover from self-mutilation. If you identify with us, join us in our fellowship. There is a solution.

The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop mutilating oneself physically. There are no dues or fees for SMA membership. We are self-supporting through our own contributions. SMA is not allied with any sect, denomination, politics, organization or institution; does not wish to engage in any controversy; neither endorses nor opposes any causes. Our primary purpose is to stop mutilating ourselves and to help others to recover from self-mutilation.

By physical self-mutilation, we mean deliberately causing injury to our bodies without the intention of ending our lives. This includes cutting ourselves, tearing out body hair (Trichotillomania), self-injurious skin picking (also called acne mutilation, psychogenic or neurotic excoriation, self-inflicted dermatosis or dermatillomania), burning ourselves, scratching until blood is drawn, reopening wounds, swallowing objects, banging our heads against the wall, breaking bones or teeth, tearing or severely biting cuticles or nails, chewing the inside of the mouth, compulsive body-tattooing, excessive cosmetic surgeries, body-piercing, etc.

Coping Methods
When I feel I need to cut I ask myself the following questions:

Why do I feel I need to hurt myself? What has brought me to this point?
Have I been here before? What did I do to deal with it? How did I feel then?
What I have done to ease this discomfort so far? What else can I do that won't hurt me?
How do I feel right now?
How will I feel when I am hurting myself?
How will I feel after hurting myself? How will I feel tomorrow morning?
Can I avoid this stressor, or deal with it better in the future?
Do I need to hurt myself?

Things that help me to avoid hurting myself:

I jump on the computer and find someone to email. We talk about everything and anything.
I do productive things that keep me busy and active. I clean the back porch, a closet, or mop the floors.
I walk a lot, and think.
I write about self-injury. I write about my failures and successes both and it helps, if anything, just to keep me busy.
I create something, a picture, poem, story, item of clothing, anything really.

A great tip a friend gave me:

TREAT YOURSELF NICE, EVEN IF YOU FEEL YOU DON'T DESERVE IT!

Once someone told me that her therapist had suggested doing something nice for herself after SI'ing. So I tried it. I cut one night, and then afterwards I took a bubble bath, and took a cup of hot chocolate and a good book to bed early. It really did help.

And then one day.....I thought......If doing something nice for myself after self-injuring makes me feel better, then maybe it would help if I did something nice as a treat for NOT cutting.

It makes sense to baby ourselves when we feel bad after hurting ourselves, so doesn't it also make sense that it would help to do it before we cut when we are feeling our worst?

So when the cutting urge is strong, I try doing something I like. Visiting my mom, painting, reading, bubble bath in the dark with music playing. My gift to myself for not cutting. It doesn't work all the time, but it does work a lot.
Make an emergency box. Suggestions on what to include:
Crayons, or paint, and paper.
A puzzle.
A word game book.
Your favorite book.
A cd of your favorite songs.
Pictures of friends.
Letters that are special to you (or cards).
A book or cd of inspirational messages.
A list of phone numbers and addresses of friends. (Make phone calls, or write letters.)
Stories about your special memories.
Only open your emergency box in an emergency, or it loses it special-ness. About once every two or three months entirely change the contents. Have an SO or a friend, or your child pick something special to put into the box while you're not looking so that there will be a surprise for you when you do have to open it.
Are you sure you're going to self-injure?

Has it taken over your thoughts like it does with so many of us?

Can you picture it in your mind?

Can you see yourself self-injuring? Imagine every step of the way?

When I want to cut I can see it all in my mind. Many of us can.
You have to get it OUT!!!!

So start writing!!!!

Write it all out. Be very descriptive, describe every little step. Only do this when you feel you are SURE you will be hurting yourself, otherwise you may trigger yourself into doing it when you don't want to. Go back and read it again.

Get another piece of paper, and write it all over again, only this time leave out the vivid physical description, and instead write only about emotions. Begins sentences with: "I feel....", "I want to feel.....", "I don't feel.....", "when I _____, I feel...".

This may release the tension (having someone else actually read it sometimes helps, if you need to you can send it my way, or take it into your therapist's office). It may just emotionally exhaust you so that you don't have the energy to hurt yourself.
And if it doesn't work you have a written record of your emotions that you can look back on later that really could help you get a better insight into your self-injury.

The key is to learn how to identify your emotions, triggers, and stressors, so that you can learn how to better deal with them in the future, or how to avoid or lessen them.

Allow yourself to hurt and to be angry and to feel guilt, but also remember that you have to learn how to deal with these things and how to ease them.

The Butterfly Project:
When you feel like you want to cut, take a marker, pen, or sharpies and draw a butterfly on your arm or hand.
Name the butterfly after a loved one, or someone that really wants you to get better.
You must let the butterfly fade naturally. NO scrubbing it off.
If you cut before the butterfly is gone, you’ve killed it. If you don't cut, it lives.
If you have more than one butterfly, cutting kills all of them.
Another person may draw them on you. These butterflies are extra special. Take good care of them.

Alternatively, if you want them to last longer, you may first draw a caterpillar. When it fades, draw a cocoon. When it fades, start at step one!

THE 15 AFFIRMATIONS OF SMA
1. I let my body heal.
2. I stay conscious of my feelings and write them down.
3. I have the right to be injury free, no matter what.
4. I applaud my willingness.
5. I'm free to spend my time as I choose.
6. My body is beautiful; I want to take care of it.
7. I deserve to come into the inheritance of my own beauty.
8. Life is safe.
9. I accept myself exactly how and who I am today.
10. I am willing to become increasingly more gentle and loving to myself.
11. I joyfully say, "No."
12. I have survived my childhood.
13. I deserve to be the person I am.
14. My humour is a sign of my recovery.
15. If at first I don't succeed, I lower my expectations.

Article by Kendra P.
One in 12. That is roughly the number of teens in the United States that engage in self-injury.

Self injury is intentional damage that some one does to themselves and, according to the Mental Health Foundation, usually begins from as young as age 11 but it really has no age limit. Often, teens who suffer from anxiety and depression disorders will use self injury as a way to relieve the feelings of stress, anxiety, depression and emotional numbness. Sadly, self injury among teens is often dismissed and said to be a manipulative way to get attention. This is not always true. Many self-harmers are self conscious of their wounds and scars and tend to hide them with their clothes and are also very closed about speaking to others about their self-harm. Due to the secrecy involved in self injury, there is hardly any credible statistics for the number of self harming teens.

Contrary to belief, self-harmers have no suicidal intentions as studied by the British Journal of Psychiatry. Self-harmers are not trying to end their own lives. They use self harm as a means of a coping mechanism to relieve emotional turmoil and pain that they do not understand how to express through words.

Precursors to self harm usually go in this order: The person will become overstressed, making them feel overwhelmed, unable to cope or sensitive which then triggers them. They then self injure which makes them feel in control and calm. The other order is the person will feel dissociation which leads to the feeling of numbness, loneliness, and making them feel disconnected or unreal. They then use self injury to feel alive and able to function.This may not seem like a a conventional way to deal with emotional pain but, in the mind of a self harmer, it is easier to cope with physical pain. In other words, they use self harm to transfer emotional pain that they cannot cope with to physical pain that they can.

On March 1, 2002, Self-Injury Awareness Day (SIAD) was made an official annual and global event represented by an orange ribbon. The goal of SIAD is to break down the stereotypes surrounding Self-Injury (SI) and help other people understand that SI is a real problem, not just another teenage stage and is promoted through FirstSigns.

So instead of stereotyping someone you know that self harms, try to understand where they are coming from and reach out to them.

If you would like to be involved in the facebook group (privacy is set to "secret", so it is not searchable, and the only way to view any content, become a member, or see who is a member is to be added by someone who is already a member) please contact me for more information!

facebook page: http://selfmutilatorsanonymous.org/
 

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