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Fillintheblank
Guest
Please don't think I'm a bad person, I'm just a fresia up. Well lets start, I've always been a shy person an introvert you see. Shortly after 3rd grade I was taken out of public school and was suppose to be home-schooled, and I would do all my socializing on a school bus which my mother drove. But eventually the bus became over crowded, and I was forced to stop. I lost all my so-called friends after that.
And I would spend the next 6 years alone. For a while there I spent most of my time in my room and I was completely nocturnal. I began talking to myself after a while, and when I turned 18yo I set out to change all that. I set up a myspace and looked up a girl I knew of from drivers-ed where I never made a friend in the first place, but it was my last time in contact with people. She accepted, and we messaged back and forth but it never worked out.
Then my cousin came into the picture, he had a similar experience with being locked off from the world. Only he had the courage to attempt high-school. Being an extrovert he made friends to which one day I was introduced. One girl stood out to me, Liz, she was very lively. My cousin would talk to her every night over the phone, and one night he three wayed it, and she learned that I didn't have any friends, so she sent me a friend request I was reluctant and she insisted I accept. I felt odd about are age difference, I was 19, she only 15. But she kept telling me she was the best friend you could ever have and I just gave in,
She could have been more right. Because later on I met her older sister Kate, whom I became friends with as well and I had a thing for her. we knew each other for about three years. Back in October her sis and I really started hanging out and partying. I was practically living at there house getting drunk, watching all sorts of movies and tv shows not to mention x-box. Then one night we went to a party and I got stupid drunk. And I grabbed her butt and tried to kiss her. needless to say I was kicked out.
But the repercussions of that night were far reaching, all the friends I thought I made won't speak to me, nor will the sis. The only one who stayed is Liz, she's stood by my side through other fresia ups, and has defended me. This one though is by far the worst, she told me I was lucky to have her, which i don't doubt. But her family is against are friendship, particularity her mother, who never liked me. Because I'm a rapist now we can't hang out, even though Kate is okay with it. It's been almost 2 months since it happed, and I just can't get over it. I mean Kate trusted me a lot, I'm just not that kind of guy who does that.
The last thing I want right now is to lose miss Liz, I love that girl with all my heart. Being an introvert makes people think I'm a creep even in my own family. My family has gone as far as tell my cousin not to talk to me. All because I don't say much, It's not like I don't try either, but I run out of things to say quickly. Its not until later on that I think of something I could have said. I constantly feel like I'm from a different planet. It makes me want to scream, its like what does the world want from me, I'm human too! Why do you feel the need to isolate me? I hate myself so much at times because for once I was happy and content, I had what I begged god for all those years. And what do I do I fresia up.
Its late now in my part of the world, and so much still that I want to say. But I'm scared that I might lose Liz, I even wrote her an email telling her all the things I wanted her to know.[/font]
And I would spend the next 6 years alone. For a while there I spent most of my time in my room and I was completely nocturnal. I began talking to myself after a while, and when I turned 18yo I set out to change all that. I set up a myspace and looked up a girl I knew of from drivers-ed where I never made a friend in the first place, but it was my last time in contact with people. She accepted, and we messaged back and forth but it never worked out.
Then my cousin came into the picture, he had a similar experience with being locked off from the world. Only he had the courage to attempt high-school. Being an extrovert he made friends to which one day I was introduced. One girl stood out to me, Liz, she was very lively. My cousin would talk to her every night over the phone, and one night he three wayed it, and she learned that I didn't have any friends, so she sent me a friend request I was reluctant and she insisted I accept. I felt odd about are age difference, I was 19, she only 15. But she kept telling me she was the best friend you could ever have and I just gave in,
She could have been more right. Because later on I met her older sister Kate, whom I became friends with as well and I had a thing for her. we knew each other for about three years. Back in October her sis and I really started hanging out and partying. I was practically living at there house getting drunk, watching all sorts of movies and tv shows not to mention x-box. Then one night we went to a party and I got stupid drunk. And I grabbed her butt and tried to kiss her. needless to say I was kicked out.
But the repercussions of that night were far reaching, all the friends I thought I made won't speak to me, nor will the sis. The only one who stayed is Liz, she's stood by my side through other fresia ups, and has defended me. This one though is by far the worst, she told me I was lucky to have her, which i don't doubt. But her family is against are friendship, particularity her mother, who never liked me. Because I'm a rapist now we can't hang out, even though Kate is okay with it. It's been almost 2 months since it happed, and I just can't get over it. I mean Kate trusted me a lot, I'm just not that kind of guy who does that.
The last thing I want right now is to lose miss Liz, I love that girl with all my heart. Being an introvert makes people think I'm a creep even in my own family. My family has gone as far as tell my cousin not to talk to me. All because I don't say much, It's not like I don't try either, but I run out of things to say quickly. Its not until later on that I think of something I could have said. I constantly feel like I'm from a different planet. It makes me want to scream, its like what does the world want from me, I'm human too! Why do you feel the need to isolate me? I hate myself so much at times because for once I was happy and content, I had what I begged god for all those years. And what do I do I fresia up.
Its late now in my part of the world, and so much still that I want to say. But I'm scared that I might lose Liz, I even wrote her an email telling her all the things I wanted her to know.[/font]