The Misadventures of Man vs. Beast

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Doubt The Rabbit

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I want to hear all your funny animal encounters :D

I have one, which isn't about me, it's actually about my brother. My parents used to take us to a duck pond where swans and geese often gathered to eat the popcorn and bread we fed them. Well, one swan took a liking to my younger brother, and wanted his full attention (and popcorn). When my brother tried to get away, the swan bit him on the hand and tried to pull him along with her! :p
Ah, young love.
 
When I fist read the title quickly, I thought it said "Breast."

*blink*

Then I immediately thought "A moose once bit my sister"

mooseoncebitmysister.jpg


But no.

As I mentioned in the other thread, my grandparents used to have some barnyard fowl - geese, ducks, and a coop full of chickens. The chickens were pretty cool, although the stink of a hen house is like nothing I can describe except to say it smells "hot" and "foreign." Anyway, the ducks were so cute and fairly friendly. They'd always come waddling-quacking over to us.

The geese, on the other hand... There was this awful old white gander who was mean. He'd pretty much snap at anyone whose unlucky turn it was to go get some eggs. You learned pretty quickly the origin of the expression "to goose someone." No joke. That old ******* would nip at your ass.

Although he hated pretty much everyone but my grandmother, he reserved most of his ill-will for one of my uncles. OMG, it was that bird's mission in life to take a chunk out of my uncle at every opportunity. He would chase him at top speed around the yard, honking and hissing, wings fully extended and flapping, and snapping at him as soon as he got close enough. It was hilarious... as long as it wasn't you being chased. :D
 
tangerinedream said:
When I fist read the title quickly, I thought it said "Breast."

*blink*

Then I immediately thought "A moose once bit my sister"
LOL! Nice, monty python. :cool: Also, your poor uncle!
 
How old was your brother when he had that ill-fated fling with the swan?

They are really big birds. It can be easy to dismiss them from far away, but up close, wings fully extended, all stretched out, I bet they could put a beating on someone. lol
 
I was walking home from the local grocery store and I saw a guy walking his Rottweiler off a leash. The dog proceeded to run towards me. I love animals, but I was as nervous as a hooker in church.

He stopped in front of me then rolled over on his back. The owner yelled out: "He wants you to scratch his belly." So I did. Thank God! I honestly thought he was going to bite me.
 
my father would build nests off the shore of our house. One nest had a goose in it. Dad broke the goose's egg. One time me and my brother were standing by the nest trying to poke the goose with a stick and it was hissing at us.

Then, it started honking, and we heard honks from afar and a whole flock of geese flew over us. So, me and my brother thought the geese were coming after us, so we started running pel-mell towards our house.

The end.
 

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