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Stars

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http://gawker.com/5323472/we-predict-more-lawsuits-in-dov-charneys-future

http://www.torontosun.com/life/2011/03/17/17656191.html

So during my search for night and weekend work; I'm struggling.

One issue is that my particular field rarely has any evening and weekend work. What only remains is the service industry; and many of the restaurants near me are chock full of beautiful waitresses and staff.

While I am average weight and take care of myself; my facial features are quite plain looking. I don't have strong features and no matter how I do my makeup, hair etc - I always look the same. This is a face that cannot change. I've had people tell me I'm a 4 to 7; even by a man that I thought was madly in love with me one time.
I also have foot problems so I can't wear heels etc. and while searching for jobs; I came across these articles which speak nothing but the truth. :(

No wonder I never hear call-backs.
When I go to school - how am I supposed to support myself if I can't find work during evenings and weekends??
No matter how much anyone tries to comfort me - it doesn't change my job situation and how any Hiring Manager will see me.

/justavent

EDIT: Also, what pains me further is that I'm not super smart (I'm just average; never aced exams no matter how much I studied; bad memory etc) and my marks are too low for every university and even community college. I'm not sure how I'll get by in life.
 
On the flip-side, it may also be a confidence thing. People, especially hiring managers, can sniff out those with confidence issues. It doesn't look good, especially if they are looking to hire people with warm, fluffy, or the-sun-is-shining-out-of-my-butt attitudes.

I definitely think you should really strive to embrace your look. However, I also know what it feels like when your appearance takes a toll on your overall confidence... Most of the time, I feel like crawling underneath a rock and staying there forever.

In my effort to look half-way decent, I've picked up a few things
- Beauty magazines are actually the spawn of the devil, but can be helpful in picking out some trendy/fresh (but professional) clothing styles. Since you can't wear heels, maybe look at getting some trendy flats? You may even be able to add arch support in them.
- Youtube/google make up how-to videos. Michelle Phan has some great videos and make-up tips. Or you can find a bunch on how to get Kim Kardashian's make-up features -- which involves a lot of facial contouring with bronzers.
- Fake eyelashes. If you can get the hang of glue application: The bolder, the better. If you can find a nearby swapmeet, they can sell these for $0.25-$1, instead of outrageous $5-$10 you'd spend at a convenience sore.
- Professional fake nails/manicured nails. Nails are really important -- believe it or not. It's often one of the first few things people look at, and it can reveal a lot about a person. For example, I bite and chew mine to bits... And people correlate gnawed-down-nails to neurotic/anxious personality types. But when I have the french-manicured nails, I'm less inclined to bite the hell out of them... People also stopped eying my hands as much.
- Find something you like about your features and exaggerate it. Or something that people may have complimented you on in the past. Don't say you can't find anything -- if that is the case, you aren't looking hard enough.
- Or find something you can improve on. In my case, I have bald patches due to being ill... So I picked up a few hair pieces to help camouflage those areas.

I hope some of these can help a bit... But like I said, really work towards embracing your appearance. And if you don't find a guy that thinks you are beyond beautiful without all of the fake tid-bits, then he's not worth your time.

In addition, it also may be worth while to apply to jobs that do not stress as much on physical appearance. For example, don't apply to a fitness club for a front-desk position. They usually only accept attractive/fit/athletic female applicants because A.) It attracts male customers B.) An athletic body represents the "fitness" atmosphere.

Why go through all of the added frustration of molding yourself into being something you don't want to be? Something you don't have to be.

All of the added fake stuff, in my experience, is only worth it for me because it lifts my spirits enough to feel somewhat confident. Which is sad, but, whatever. Not everyone may want to waste their time like that. And no one should have to.


 
I don't believe that your ugly, you are just not confident enough. Sometimes someone who is insecure can be seen as weak or cannot convince people of their strengths and BEAUTY. It is hard to change that and I know for personal experience (I used to be really shy.) And can still be in new situations. Now a lot of this changed for me and even had some girlfriends by now. A great example is why people always wonder why the ******* gets all the girls and the ***** gets all the guys, This is because they are confident about themselves (and extremely annoying in most cases).

Also i don't believe you cannot ''change'' yourself by taking another haircut or using make-up, you most likely have to do something more extreme (i'm not talking about a mohawk or crazy gothic make-up) but just a totally different style.

Again i'm a good example of that:

A shy 16yo boy:
2ztki3c.jpg


Me now at the age of 21:
2637gd3.jpg


And again, you don't have to be intelligent to succeed. Working hard and have a lot of passion in what you like (this is also important.) will get you a lot of goals to reach.
 
I'm just going to head over to Dark Poet's thread about writing something positive you did today and work on my self esteem.
 
That's just life. The more attractive you are, the easier things are for you. 2x true in the service industry.
 
Yeah, every average person goes through this. Having to not be hired over the more attractive members of their gender, or the opposite gender...

I think the best thing to do is to not be bitter about it. Soon enough, everyone will look the same (when they're old.)
 
To the OP, I feel for you. To the rest of you, you should be ashamed of yourselves. Your kind are the reason we are in this mess. How long are you people going to worship the satanist bankers and the beast? This is clearly unacceptable. It's discrimination, it's slavery, it's elitism, these control freaks even want to control your very personality. fresia that, and screw them. I dare say there is no salvation except through full and absolute rebellion.

"yeah, but that life, thats how it is, what can anyone do about it?" Nothing until the lot of you wake up. So start waking more people up. I mean how bad does it have to become? Little by little full and absolute slavery is becoming acceptable. School is too long, too expensive, they beat around the bush, doctors and lawyers take everything they can and always choose whatever method makes you spend the most money, esp on pharmaceuticals. I know a persons gotta by, but theres more like to life then slavery.
 
What are you talking about Pheadron? She is obviously insecure about herself, and you make it like we say she HAS to change to be Beautiful. Which is not the case, the options I talk about is that she might feel herself more Beautiful (More confident) and if she doesn't want that she shouldn't. This all will IMPROVE herself and her personality

I think you are the one that should be ashamed of yourself, ranting about the average Rebel BS. And saying that everyone who is ''normal'' are childs of satan himself, you are acting real naive here. (Like a teenager?)

Maybe is should change my point of view now, Stars, You should get Tattoo's everywhere, Piecings everywhere, walk around in in camo pants and say fresia the world against everyone. Because that works out so well and get you a job. (btw if you're saying that im stereotyping i've been a metalhead and know all about how those guys think).
 
Man... Good example of the confidence thing just happened to me today.

Confidence is so important. If you don't look at yourself as some kind of asset with something valuable to bring to the table, no one else will.
 
Who would want to work at a place where they only hire you if your ass and chest look nice.
Try to look for a job somewhere where they have mostly male waitresses or where you can obviously see that they don't do that crap. Reminded me of this episode :p

[video=vimeo]
 

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