My life(pretty long post)

Hey,im quite new to this whole thing but i came here because im quite lonely as well.
I moved to australia 3 years ago when i was 14.I havent seen my family in 3 years but im trying to cope.( oh yeah we moved from south africa so sorry for bad english). Anyway i read what you guys write about your lives and stuff, and i cant believe how similar it is.like most of you im mostly lonely and trying to fit in. My whole life i have been teased and picked on and embarresed. I have never had a girlfriend so i dont know what its like to cuddle or kiss. Im 17 now and i would say im really attractive ( not trying to brag) lol. Im really skinny and because of that i have no confidence.all my thoughts about myself is negative and my life has become so dull and boring. I know some people might think that i do actually have the perfect life, being spoiled and all, but somehow im just not happy. Ive had a girlfriend in 2012 and her name was emma. I thought she was the cutest and hottest girl. Beautiful brown eyes and brown hair. She was one of the "popular" types of girls with a whole group of friends.

Ive never had any real friends and the only ones i had was my best friends which eventually left me. I now have 3 best friends who always talks about how they feel sad about people not inviting them to their houses and stuff.i just want to yell in their faces "HOW THE HELL ARE YOU SAD, YOU GO OUT EVERY NIGHT,YOUR FUNNY,BIG SND STRONG,CONFIDENT AND SMART." but well i dont know...im pretty confused and not very smart,well at least that is what everybody says.
Anyway, i actually asked that girl out (emma) and that lasted about 5 months when she decided we should break up. Her excuse was that she wanted to finish year 11 and 12 before getting a boyfriend.i said " fair enough,well be friends for now" but she ignored me every day i came to school. I tried getting over her for the past 1 and half year, but i never thought it would be so hard. I find myself thinking of her everyday, although i really dislike her.

So the start of my last year of school i met a girl, her name is tanika,pretty, cute, funny and i thought she was perfect ( not everyday when you find a perfect girl) so we talked, and she said that she would love to be my girlfriend, but i told her that i would ask her out but at the end of this year..she said she would wait until i s ready.but guess what...a week later she became really good friends with a friend of mine,and now they are dating. Today i still talk to that friend because i believe in being the better person (im a Christian by the way). I also happen to know that he slept with a couple of girls and that my crush ( tanika) doesnt even know...should i tell her that he slept with a few girls and ruin their relationship?hmm i thought about it but,i couldnt be bothered.
Every night and day i wish i had a proper girlfriend,one that doesnt judge me for being quiet,skinny,dumb coz these were the reasons my relationships never work out.sometimes i think that i will never get a happy ever after ( i know it sounds gay for a guy) but its probably my only goal,is to get married with the perfect girl.and to love her and kiss her,and hold her and cuddle.im 17 and have never done these things,ive held a girls hand which was pretty amazing,and also kinda pethetic. Wow i cant believe how being lonely can tear you appart and pull your life inside out. Depression,anger.i cant believe im writing this coz this is not like me,but nobody else would listen,and im way too shy to talk about this face to face.

This prblem has goten so bad that,everyday directly after school,i go to my room,close the door,and either sleep,play video games or play guitar. I think you will all agree when i say music is one of the best things,which can change your mood and make you a bit happier.well atleast for me it does.

Sorry if you find it hard to understand me and if it is too long.
Hopefully all of us will get the perfect partner,who loves us,cares for us,respect us and who understand us,because we all know people that are just complete "douchbags" that is currently dating an amazing girl thwt deserves better. This world is truly ###### up.

Love

Sk8aboi

Life is wonerful, sk8a. Open yourself up to the world. There's no point of even thinking that much about girls at this point. Do what you want to do, maybe something productive, and when you love yourself for who you are, somebody will tag along.

If I were you I'd focus on getting the best grades possible, and get to a good college as well as improve myself. Hell, I'm 24 and I am still doing that. There's no way to marry a woman happily if I cannot provide for myself and for a kid down the line. You are at a crossroads in life and now's the time to act. You have many, many years before you actually need to worry about girls.

Thanx man.and yeah i know that i might be to young and everything but lonelienss doesnt just go away,well for me anyway.espescially after a break up,and when you have to see your crush everyday while she ignores you.it stuff like that makes it worse and brings down your conffidence.

I read your entire post. Loneliness can wreck you, there's no doubt about that one. Not everyone's strong,and a lot of us need a push every now and then. When you don't get that push (motivation) then you start feeling really sad...hopeless...worthless... The loneliness which is bad enough eventually turns into this deep dark place called depression and it's awful. I've been dealing with loneliness every since I was home-schooled. I believe that's what triggered it. You, on the other hand, seem to have more social interaction than I do, so you surely have a better chance at finding a partner than myself.
I mean, you are 17. I would just give it time. Dating would probably be a lot better and easier when you're older. Then,you will have experience,money,you'll know yourself more and you'll be more mature. I wouldn't stress over something so petty as dating,especially now. I'd put that focus towards something else.

Words of wisdom right there. but say, thats how i feel everyday and lonliness is always around. It gets annoying because i can try and ignore it but,somehow its impossible to try and ignore it. I do spend time doing other stuff like skateboarding etc,but i find myself thinking about being in a relationship and stuff like that. Im way too shy to talk to any girls,and when your too shy to talk to a girl,youll never get anywhere. People keep telling me "just get some balls and talk to a girl""its easy".it pisses me off so much.

Yeah, I'm certainly not the dating guru. When it comes to relationships, I can't really say much on it. I apologize... but as for loneliness... I completely understand. I have moments where I just want to talk to someone and I won't even know why, I just do. So I'll pick up the phone and call a few people that I know...most of the time, no one answers.

No need for apoligizing. and yeah sometimes i talk about it with one friend of mine,he understands and respects everything i tell him,but nobody can fix my problems but me.its something we have to try and deal with.sharing problems does help,but will never completely fix everything.