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A Guy

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I have a sister, 55, who can't settle down. She does menial jobs, freeloads, stays with people, and moves constantly. She'll be in my town at around Christmas, and will be house sitting at a house roughly 10 miles from here.

She asked if I wanted to "come over" for Christmas dinner. I that was a strange question. Come over? It's not her house. It feels weird, and I'm not doing it. I'd feel like an intruder.

It would be HUGELY different if she were responsible and productive and had her own place.

Am I wrong with this?
 
At 55, I'm sure she's doing what she wants. Even if she were 25, it's no one's place to try and make her settle down. At her age, she's past the point in her life where she should listen to people's advice on how to live. If you don't want to go visit her, that's fine. I actually understand how you feel about that situation, but why should it matter so much now what she does? Sounds like she's been doing this for a long time.
 
VanillaCreme said:
At 55, I'm sure she's doing what she wants. Even if she were 25, it's no one's place to try and make her settle down. At her age, she's past the point in her life where she should listen to people's advice on how to live. If you don't want to go visit her, that's fine. I actually understand how you feel about that situation, but why should it matter so much now what she does? Sounds like she's been doing this for a long time.

I agree. I think she's very short-sighted, but never mention it. It's not any of my business or concern how she lives. And it's not up to me to try and change her. How many people get to live how they want? Not many.

It doesn't matter to me how she lives, but I don't want to be an enabler.

If I want to get stupid drunk every day, no one would try to change that, nor should they. But I shouldn't expect people to see it my way.
 
Going to visit her isn't enabling her. She'd be this way regardless of if you visit her or not. Don't allow this to get in the way of seeing her for the holidays.
 
Why don't you ask her to dinner at your place? This way, you would not have to go to someone else's house and feel like an intruder, but you would be seeing your sister at Christmas. She might be lonely and have got this particular job at Christnmas to be near you.
 
Badjedidude said:
Let her live her own **** life.

Missed the point there, huh? Not too smart, or just a troll. Or both.


Tiina63 said:
Why don't you ask her to dinner at your place? This way, you would not have to go to someone else's house and feel like an intruder, but you would be seeing your sister at Christmas. She might be lonely and have got this particular job at Christnmas to be near you.

Now there's some good advice. I was thinking about that. Thanks. What a contrast with the "advice" from the idiot above!
 
Badjedidude said:
A Guy said:
Missed the point there, huh? Not too smart, or just a troll. Or both.

lol no u

Wow - what snappy comeback! That's quite a zinger! Must have taken you a while to come up with that gem.

I broke rule #1: Never engage in a war of wits with an unarmed adversary. :)
 
A Guy said:
Wow - what snappy comeback! That's quite a zinger! Must have taken you a while to come up with that gem.

I broke rule #1: Never engage in a war of wits with an unarmed adversary.

You're a cool dude.

Way to make a great splash on the forum.
 
Please quit the bickering. One more "zinger" from anyone, witty or not, and this'll be getting the giant padlock graphic.
 
Not exactly a zinger, but an accurate retort: Badjedidude, you're a *********! You can't fix ignorance and stupidity.
 
A Guy said:
Not exactly a zinger, but an accurate retort: Badjedidude, you're a *********! You can't fix ignorance and stupidity.

You're right, it's not a zinger. It's not a retort either, it's aggressive and insulting behaviour solely at your instigation. This thread is going nowhere.
 
A Guy said:
Not exactly a zinger, but an accurate retort: Badjedidude, you're a *********! You can't fix ignorance and stupidity.

I would also like to add that I'd already warned about name-calling in this thread and that warning was ignored. A three-day ban is light, considering you ignored warnings by two moderators.
 
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