Why does looks matter?

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Azariah

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Sorry if this topic has been discussed here before.

Why does looks matter? Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if everybody looked the same. I'd probably like more girls than I do now. Even appearances matter to animals. The girl I like is very beautiful and I wonder if she looked different would I still like her? What if she gets into a horrible accident and gets disfigured, would I still like her? I think of less attractive girls and wonder what if they looked like the girl I like, would I fall for them?

Something I wonder about. Your thoughts would be appreciated.
 
Let me give you a cold shower with some facts.

The drive for sex is a drive for reproduction. People have been programmed to look for healthy individuals i.e. symmetric faces, healthy bodies and body weight, and etc in order to make healthy babies. If there's a "reason" of why life gave us sexuality, it's that.

If your girlfriend were much uglier than she really is, you would not have even noticed her. This is the cold hard truth. I'll let others sugar coat it to your liking all they want.
 
Everyone has their own interpretation of idealism. As you have mentioned it - I have a very good friend who is facially disfigured, everyone thinks he is great and he has never had problems getting a girlfriend and now in a long term relationship.

So it all depends on the individuals preferences.

Perfanoff is right, but its not completely cast in stone.
 
Yes it's not. It's just the underlying biological drive and it's usually very strong.

But we're complex because we are human beings, :) All the experiences and such build up to make us more interesting and unpredictable.
 
perfanoff said:
The drive for sex is a drive for reproduction. People have been programmed to look for healthy individuals i.e. symmetric faces, healthy bodies and body weight, and etc in order to make healthy babies. If there's a "reason" of why life gave us sexuality, it's that.

Beauty has changed throughout different cultures. Be careful with what you go around saying.


I think looks matter because they're the first thing people see to judge you on.
 
it just does.

if we had a choice between a lovely looking creme cake and one that's looks gross - which one would you choose ? - they probably taste the same.
 
Idol Minos said:
Cold hard truth. Better not question it.

Oh, definitely question! But it is so.


SophiaGrace said:
perfanoff said:
The drive for sex is a drive for reproduction. People have been programmed to look for healthy individuals i.e. symmetric faces, healthy bodies and body weight, and etc in order to make healthy babies. If there's a "reason" of why life gave us sexuality, it's that.

Beauty has changed throughout different cultures. Be careful with what you go around saying.


I think looks matter because they're the first thing people see to judge you on.

Yes it has, and still the notion of beauty, implying some are more physically attractive than others, has persisted.

And yes, agreed that people definitely judge you by your looks - especially people you don't know.
 
perfanoff said:
Idol Minos said:
Cold hard truth. Better not question it.

Oh, definitely question! But it is so.


SophiaGrace said:
perfanoff said:
The drive for sex is a drive for reproduction. People have been programmed to look for healthy individuals i.e. symmetric faces, healthy bodies and body weight, and etc in order to make healthy babies. If there's a "reason" of why life gave us sexuality, it's that.

Beauty has changed throughout different cultures. Be careful with what you go around saying.


I think looks matter because they're the first thing people see to judge you on.

Yes it has, and still the notion of beauty, implying some are more physically attractive than others, has persisted.

And yes, agreed that people definitely judge you by your looks - especially people you don't know.



even when it comes to getting a job.
 
duff said:
perfanoff said:
Idol Minos said:
Cold hard truth. Better not question it.

Oh, definitely question! But it is so.


SophiaGrace said:
perfanoff said:
The drive for sex is a drive for reproduction. People have been programmed to look for healthy individuals i.e. symmetric faces, healthy bodies and body weight, and etc in order to make healthy babies. If there's a "reason" of why life gave us sexuality, it's that.

Beauty has changed throughout different cultures. Be careful with what you go around saying.


I think looks matter because they're the first thing people see to judge you on.

Yes it has, and still the notion of beauty, implying some are more physically attractive than others, has persisted.

And yes, agreed that people definitely judge you by your looks - especially people you don't know.



even when it comes to getting a job.



Especially when it comes to getting a job. You could wave credentials in front of their face, but things like confidence (which you usually have to be accepted a few times to develop) and looking "professional" secure the job.

I usually have to outright ask if I can get a chance to show what I can do on a trial basis because my long hair and furry beard make people think twice. I usually cut it, if I really feel like I belong someplace.
 
bulmabriefs144 said:
duff said:
perfanoff said:
Idol Minos said:
Cold hard truth. Better not question it.

Oh, definitely question! But it is so.


SophiaGrace said:
perfanoff said:
The drive for sex is a drive for reproduction. People have been programmed to look for healthy individuals i.e. symmetric faces, healthy bodies and body weight, and etc in order to make healthy babies. If there's a "reason" of why life gave us sexuality, it's that.

Beauty has changed throughout different cultures. Be careful with what you go around saying.


I think looks matter because they're the first thing people see to judge you on.

Yes it has, and still the notion of beauty, implying some are more physically attractive than others, has persisted.

And yes, agreed that people definitely judge you by your looks - especially people you don't know.



even when it comes to getting a job.



Especially when it comes to getting a job. You could wave credentials in front of their face, but things like confidence (which you usually have to be accepted a few times to develop) and looking "professional" secure the job.

I usually have to outright ask if I can get a chance to show what I can do on a trial basis because my long hair and furry beard make people think twice. I usually cut it, if I really feel like I belong someplace.



some firms when they advertise a position want a cv and photo.

I have no idea why they want the photo unless they don't want to interview someone who looks ugly.
 
It used to be in old England that being overweight was desirable because that usually meant that they were well to do and could afford to eat well.

Not so much these days.
 
That is because someone's appearance can tell you so very very much about them. For instance, lets start off with a male/female who is well-groomed. At minimum it tells you that they love themselves enough to dress themselves up nicely. Grooming also gives an insight into that person's interests as well. If you really want to get theoretical you can talk about how certain colors mean different things.

One important thing that appearance also tells us is health. A good example is acne, blemishes are often times a sign of poor health. Same with hair loss. How skinny or fat you are plays into that as well. Of course a healthy size is relative to the times. Either way it is another thing that works to help us choose suitable mates.

Humans need triggers to make snap decisions. Remember humans do not have the time to get to know every other human that they encounter to give them a fair chance. That is impossible, even for a loser like me who rarely talks to anyone. We need ways to trim down the selection of potential friends and mates. Is it fair, of course not, but life is never fair.
 
I can understand a potential employer asking to see a passport to prove who you are - but asking for a photo on a job application is surely bordering on discriminative behaviour ?

It shouldn't matter what someone looks like unless you are going into the modelling industry or something that requires a high level of smart appearance.

All of us know not to turn up for work looking like a bag of dirty laundry.
 
monkeysocks said:
I can understand a potential employer asking to see a passport to prove who you are - but asking for a photo on a job application is surely bordering on discriminative behaviour ?

It shouldn't matter what someone looks like unless you are going into the modelling industry or something that requires a high level of smart appearance.

All of us know not to turn up for work looking like a bag of dirty laundry.

I haven't looked for a job for years but employers used to do it. I never did apply for one of those jobs.
 
AFrozenSoul said:
One important thing that appearance also tells us is health. A good example is acne, blemishes are often times a sign of poor health. Same with hair loss. How skinny or fat you are plays into that as well. Of course a healthy size is relative to the times. Either way it is another thing that works to help us choose suitable mates.

Unfortunately, it doesn't always tell the whole story. I've lost over 100 lbs and am continuing to lose. However, I'm still overweight enough that I'm not considered to be "desirable" by today's standards. I workout, hike, jog, and am training for a 5k. My resting heart rate is 65-70 and my Dr says that except for my weight I'm in better health than a good portion of people my age. But would a woman see that by looking at me? Nope. They see a fat slob who has no self control and uses food as a crutch.

I don't blame them. It's human nature. Women do it. Guys do it. We all do it.
 
LonelyInAtl said:
AFrozenSoul said:
One important thing that appearance also tells us is health. A good example is acne, blemishes are often times a sign of poor health. Same with hair loss. How skinny or fat you are plays into that as well. Of course a healthy size is relative to the times. Either way it is another thing that works to help us choose suitable mates.

Unfortunately, it doesn't always tell the whole story. I've lost over 100 lbs and am continuing to lose. However, I'm still overweight enough that I'm not considered to be "desirable" by today's standards. I workout, hike, jog, and am training for a 5k. My resting heart rate is 65-70 and my Dr says that except for my weight I'm in better health than a good portion of people my age. But would a woman see that by looking at me? Nope. They see a fat slob who has no self control and uses food as a crutch.

I don't blame them. It's human nature. Women do it. Guys do it. We all do it.

keep up your good work and sod what others think !
 

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