sick of american women...getting out

So another night of lonely and depressed google searches (you're not alone 20years2many) and I read up some interesting info. I'm american and have not gotten beyond a first date with anyone in a year and starting to get restless. I've decided to not blame myself anymore. I'm tired of trying to figure out what is wrong with me. The average american woman has absolutely ridiculous criteria. But there is something I can do about it! I've read that women in non-westernized countries (the world outside of North america, australia, and western Europe) are not nearly as picky. Not only that, beautiful and could make great wives.

I know I should be aware there are plenty of golddiggers and scams for this kind of stuff, but what have I seriously got to lose? Learning another language? I'm not half bad at that and not a problem for me. I'd be happier robbed and losing all of my material possessions in a foreign land then take another day with my confidence at the hands of these retarded cold snooty american feminist bitches that value their lard ass like it's implanted with diamonds. I'm never good enough and don't even make friend material. Thank God.

I deserve better. After college, I'm going to expatriate to Russia, Japan, Brazil, or some S American country for a while. Who's coming with me?

I personally suspect something is very wrong here in the US. Which I think this state of wrong is the backbone of why what is happening in Iraq is happening. I think gender has nothing to do with this. I wish I could say with certianty what it is.

Like not long ago I was reading something that talked about in Canada many people still don't even lock their doors, because they have no reason to and are not afraid to not lock them. Why is crime so bad here? Why are we all so afraid and so blasted picky about everything?

I FEEL THE SAME FRIKKEN WAY... about the men here. I'm not perfect.. but I deserve better than having to be judged so harshly on 'beauty', ALWAYS being cheated on, and still being treated like crap.. I mean they really believe that they have all the choice in the world.. and I guess they do.. because women do so much crap just to be accepted by men..

Sex is only the beginning of what we do to get you'll to 'like' us.. Agrr! It's in the clothes we wear, it's in the beauty-shops we go to, it's in the things we do to try to 'hold' a man.

I don't know if it's different anywhere else..
But I will say that ANY of the guys who I have spoken to online are wayyy better (even if they are lying bastards) .. than the guys here. Simply because they treat you better. Aye-yo. Sorry guys from here.. I know one or two of you are good. But in the main; please start being men again.. have respect for women and at least pretend to give a dam!

snow said:

I know I should be aware there are plenty of golddiggers and scams for this kind of stuff, but what have I seriously got to lose? Learning another language? I'm not half bad at that and not a problem for me. I'd be happier robbed and losing all of my material possessions in a foreign land then take another day with my confidence at the hands of these retarded cold snooty american feminist bitches that value their lard ass like it's implanted with diamonds

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Good for you. It's no secret that most American women only care about money. As they get older, it just gets worse.

And no wonder there are so many divorces. Everyone wants instantaneous gratification, and when things aren't perfect, they get a divorce. These "social climbers" really get on my nerve. Women date ******* after *******, and they put up with it cause of superficial reasons. Women in other countries are much nicer. Seriously, if I could I'd go to S America. The women there are beautiful, and have a true appreciation for simple things in life. The region is much less materialistic, and people want to enjoy life rather than make a lot more money so they can outdo the other guy. Why stay in America, if it just means getting rejected by women, taking meds every day, and avoiding contact with the real world?

You really think women in other countries are better? Hate to burst your bubble, but not true (at least for Eastern Europe). And I'm sure you can find good women here in N. America too. Personally, what I noticed in less populated areas people are brought up differently, much kinder (for the most part)... while in cities, the life is too fast paced and centered aroung egoism & money.

But yeah as for Europe, I went there last summer, and when girls find out you're from Canada/ America, they assume you're loaded, and they're all over you. It all depend how the community is brought up, generally in cities many don't care about the long term relationship but more so the financial status and all that. Of course, there are many exceptions.


ps. Skorian, about Canada and open doors... not true (mabye in rural areas it's the case). Crime isn't much better here than the states.

O! I did not mean to imply that girls have sex for guys to like them a lot. Even though I did imply this; it is not really true... sometimes it's true but only when a girl is really young. =) I think

I would bet that countries that are benefiting from globalization like China, maybe Russia, are becoming more materialistic now, especially among women. They want their piece of the pie like everywhere else. Guest is right that women are nicer in more rural areas. Which is why I love southern chicks so much. I really hate dating in cities like LA and NY, I can't believe people can tolerate it for so long. I think part of my own sexual frustration stems from the fact that I've been in the wrong place my whole life. I'm much more of a laid back kind of guy than a hustle and bustle type. Even if you are wealthy, the amount of bs you have to deal with every day by the opposite sex is absolutely ridiculous in major cities.

Snow- wherever you decide to go, make sure it's not a major metropolitan area. And you should try going to a non-G8 country. I've always wondered what it would be like to live in an economically self-sufficient county. I bet the people there are extremely nice and generous.

u know honestly, in Russian and Ukrainian cities there are a lot of scam cause all career oriented women are there preying on American guys mostly who are there just looking for a simple life with a wife. Its very true that when they hear "American" theyr all over them.Lots of women raised in cities are 3times divorced dont do honeysuckle. The best ones are raised in some villages..deep...they're mostly every-sunday-church-choir girls taught to take care of a family and husband and 10 kids and a cow..lol..but they're taken right after highschool by local alcoholics and put up with their honeysuckle cause they supposed to love whatever "God sends them" piece of honeysuckle. I saw some classmates of mine when i was there in school that I was like.....khe khe I would wonna wify like that too. Pretty decent girls are few and hard to find. I only saw them in little towns that u can hardly see on the map lol.
The big red flag is if ur 40 and some 18 yrold falls deeply in love with u at first sight thats a scaaaaam . Or if someone after like one date with u says "thats it ur my love we meant to be together lets go get married tonight."

In NYC I see lots of white rich men with chinese and japanese women, so I guess theres a solution

I think its the person rather than the nationality that matters. The only difference is that people from different cultures have different levels of expectations, but I'll say that people from incredibly insular surroundings are likely to also be very provincial and shun people from "different" surroundings.

But anything that brings you closer to happiness is a good thing, so I wish you and anyone else all the fortune.

Regards,
IO

I definitely agree with the original post.

Anytime I skim through the personals ads on Craiglist, all the girls are looking for "Mr. Right", "a man who will spoil me", "a man who won't show any insecurity", and a bunch of other fairy-tale prerequisites of unattainable perfection.

But I definitely suggest doing some research before taking the plane trip and immersing yourself in a completely new cultural environment.

For example, there's a lot to know about Japan in regards to ethnic and cultural dynamics. So read up.

I think the system is more of the problem then the people. The problem lies in the adds themselves and in the very concept of how people are trying to get to know one another. One reason why I feel so discontent with how things went in highschool and college for me as really in that environment your more likely to meet people in a more reasonable fashion then anywhere else other then maybe at work. It's to ackward to try to get to know strangers with the intent of getting to know them. Not seeing them in there own element so to speak. You don't really get to know anyone that way since it's so easy for people to act rather then just be themselves. Sort of how outside the context of school it is hard for kids to picture their teachers as a real live person. Something I used to think about a long time ago. It's like they are perminent parts of the school building that just appear when your there. Since you often don't get the chance to see them as real people doing something other then their jobs.

I agree with Guest and IO.

@ snow: If you've met snooty and stuck-up women up until now, it's not because they're American, it's because you just happen to meet snooty and stuck-up people. You'd be hard-pressed to find the level of diversity that you see in America. There are women here with cultural mores and traditions from all over the globe. This is truly the cultural melting pot. I've met my share of superficial women, but I've also met some very kind and open-minded girls. Just be patient, and the right girl will come along. Moving to a different country isn't going to solve your problems. Gold-diggers and scammers exist all over the world; it's hardly an American thing.

@ lonelyloser: EVERYBODY cares about money. It's not just American women. Being financially stable is something everyone worries about, regardless of nationality or gender. Also, American women are actually less concerned about money than women in other places. When participating in a survey, American women rated "love" as the most important requirement for a relationship, while women from other countries rated financial stability, social status, and other traits as being the most important (not some online internet poll, this was an actual study conducted by prominent social psychologists).

@ matt: I question whether women on Craigslist adequately represent the general female population. People who are unsuccessful at meeting members of the opposite sex generally have unrealistic expectations of both members of the opposite sex and relationships. The fact that these women are resorting to a site like Craigslist leads me to believe that they might fall into this category. Psychological studies have shown that, in the face of ambiguous information (unfamiliar topics), people will resort to stereotypes. If this is true, then it would be completely reasonable for them to have unrealistic expectations of what a relationship should be; they're basing all their ideas off movies and fairy tales. A girl who has had several boyfriends knows that the key to a healthy relationship is compromise and understanding, not being pampered and getting her way.

The reality is, there are thousands of different types of women, each with different expectations of both men and relationships. Please don't think that "all women are the same." That's an almost sure-fire way of guaranteeing that you won't find a good, healthy relationship. The best way to meet and befriend women is by treating them with respect and courtesy, just like everyone else.

blak000 said:

I question whether women on Craigslist adequately represent the general female population.

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Very true; indeed, I was thinking about this myself as I typed my post. But this is the most easily accessible "resource" I have, and it's pretty reliable in the sense that it's not some artificial survey, but rather a collection of real attempts to find "love", despite the demographically limited applicability.

What I've found is that sometimes your mindset changes when you go to a diff country, which kind of erases all your stereotypes about women, and causes you to be more attractive. If you go to a developing country with the expectation that women are more homely and appreciative of men, then you might come across as a great guy, because you're more positive. If you've been in America your whole life, like me, you don't even want to meet new women because you're just assuming their all the same. Whether they are or are not is irrelevant. Like everyone has been saying here, it's about the attitude, right?

Yes women from craigslist are not a good sample of the population. They have the craziest expectations cause they're getting emails from 200 guys every time they post. If you try to meet a woman online, she'll try to size you up before she even gets to meet you, which is completely insane. Even though my charm works better over the internet, I'd rather meet a girl face to face.

Here's why I think it is actually true that women in smaller countries are not as superficial. Women in America have choice - they can either go for the poor guy or the rich guy. So why not the rich guy? This is not always the case in smaller countries. Also, men here are more desperate, from what I've seen. So, women use this to their advantage. Men in developing countries have better success with women. I'm 99% sure that there isn't a demographic of sex deprived lonely men in those countries like there are in America. Finally, women here have more rights than in other countries. Women in America are like men. In other countries that are not as fiscally sound, women generally stay at home and cannot throw men to the curb like American women do. So, they become much softer, and less aggressive.

okay i felt guilty the whole of lastnight about my post .lol. The guys here arent that bad. They can be quite charming in the beginning. Maybe I just dont play my cards right. Yet still; some of the stuff I've seen guys do.. is pretty mean.

as for the american woman bashing.. the fact that there are fuys on this site from all over the world.. including places like China and so on means you are prolly wrong. If this site was Spanish.. you might find guys from South America here.. I dont think the women are the problem..at the end of the day we are only human. Just like you.. American women don't want to be alone, and just like you all they want is to be treated like you care.

and no.. i'm not naive =)

lonelyloser said:

Here's why I think it is actually true that women in smaller countries are not as superficial. Women in America have choice - they can either go for the poor guy or the rich guy. So why not the rich guy? This is not always the case in smaller countries. Also, men here are more desperate, from what I've seen. So, women use this to their advantage. Men in developing countries have better success with women. I'm 99% sure that there isn't a demographic of sex deprived lonely men in those countries like there are in America. Finally, women here have more rights than in other countries. Women in America are like men. In other countries that are not as fiscally sound, women generally stay at home and cannot throw men to the curb like American women do. So, they become much softer, and less aggressive.

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Exactly my point. And for jales, yes I agree that all women too have that emotional need and that we are all human. It's just our society in the western world (this was never just directed at USA) has got in the way of allowing natural relationships to form and the women have most or all of the control over relationships now. And I'm not even saying that our women are happier, they are just as wrecked by their own system. Hopping from guy to guy just because they can while at the same time emotionally destroying themselves. That or verbally beating the man into submission in a sexless marriage.

jales said:

okay i felt guilty the whole of lastnight about my post .lol. The guys here arent that bad. They can be quite charming in the beginning. Maybe I just dont play my cards right. Yet still; some of the stuff I've seen guys do.. is pretty mean.

as for the american woman bashing.. the fact that there are fuys on this site from all over the world.. including places like China and so on means you are prolly wrong. If this site was Spanish.. you might find guys from South America here.. I dont think the women are the problem..at the end of the day we are only human. Just like you.. American women don't want to be alone, and just like you all they want is to be treated like you care.

and no.. i'm not naive =)

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+100, I agree completely.. =]..

RainyDaze said:

jales said:

okay i felt guilty the whole of lastnight about my post .lol. The guys here arent that bad. They can be quite charming in the beginning. Maybe I just dont play my cards right. Yet still; some of the stuff I've seen guys do.. is pretty mean.

as for the american woman bashing.. the fact that there are fuys on this site from all over the world.. including places like China and so on means you are prolly wrong. If this site was Spanish.. you might find guys from South America here.. I dont think the women are the problem..at the end of the day we are only human. Just like you.. American women don't want to be alone, and just like you all they want is to be treated like you care.

and no.. i'm not naive =)

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+100, I agree completely.. =]..

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I would like to conjecture there are no non-western men on this site. Please name names.

lonelyloser said:

What I've found is that sometimes your mindset changes when you go to a diff country, which kind of erases all your stereotypes about women, and causes you to be more attractive. If you go to a developing country with the expectation that women are more homely and appreciative of men, then you might come across as a great guy, because you're more positive. If you've been in America your whole life, like me, you don't even want to meet new women because you're just assuming their all the same. Whether they are or are not is irrelevant. Like everyone has been saying here, it's about the attitude, right?

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Well, I think being socially successful is a combination of both having a positive attitude and using constructive methods to improve one's social skills. If it was entirely about attitude, people would be bowing down to every narcissistic or delusional person that came along. Being confident isn't enough to make a good impression, and develop friendships with people. It also takes experience and knowing what negative habits to avoid. If a person is argumentative and hateful, then all the confidence in the world won't gain him popularity.

Also, moving to a different country won't change much about a person's situation. If that person has poor social skills and low self-esteem in America, he'll still have those traits in Europe, Asia, or any other region of the world he decides to go to. Women, regardless of where they may be, will sense those negative qualities in him the moment he tries to talk to them. The belief that "people are different here" might work in the short-term, but ultimately that person might find his situation pretty much the same. Maybe this analogy will help better explain...

Let's say there is an American man who ran his business into the ground, because he is difficult to work with and has poor business acumen. Moving to Brazil won't fix his problems and suddenly make him successful and wealthy; he still possesses the traits that caused his business to fail in the first place. Brazilian people desire friendly customer service just as much as anyone else, and any business can only survive with good marketing and financial strategies. Moving to a different location isn't the answer to the American man's problem. If he hopes to improve his financial situation, he must use a different approach with his business. He must analyze what went wrong, and then take a constructive approach on dealing with those issues.

This is the same with social skills, low self-esteem, etc. People all over the world may differ culturally, but they all want to associate themselves with confident, friendly, and ambitious people. Instead of blaming your lack of success on external causes, I would urge you to take a more constructive approach in how you meet women.

Also, lonelyloser, I hate to break it to you, but there are sex-deprived, lonely men everywhere in the world. Loneliness is not a Western thing.

I have a feeling some of the negative views expressed here towards American women were spawned from the "grass is greener on the other side" logic. If you were to actually take the time and effort to move to another place, however, I have a feeling you might be disappointed.

I don't disagree that women do have the superior control over relationships in more liberated countries, including the United States. Sadly many of them seem to make bad choices for themselves, but don't we all?

Regards,
IO