dreamsurfer
Active member
I feel like when I wake up I have nothing to look forward to or anything to be happy about. I'm broke, alone, have no job, no hobbies or anything that makes me enjoy life. I haven't had a face to face in about 7 months now. I've been trying to look on the bright side for a really long time and I just can't do it anymore. If it wasn't for God or my family I really couldn't see any reason for me to be here. I mean I don't want to die or anything but I'm not living either. Everyone likes to nag about the good things. Well what are the use of good things if you do nothing with them? They say life is priceless. Well what good is a priceless object that you just stare at all day? I can't see it.
I don't hate myself or anyone else. I got no burned bridges or enemies. And for all the time I took to finally gain some self-esteem and pride I ended up here alone with no use for either of these things. So I guess I'm just here. I hate feeling this way but I can't help it anymore. I listened to all that BS about things getting better for 7 years of my life and it never happened. Sure I got a little wiser and helped some people out but my life never really changed. I'm still the same miserable zombie I always was. I'm not angry about it anymore. I guess I've given up caring since that won't help anything. Caring never did anything for me. It helped others though and that's good.
But these days I just don't see a future for me anymore. Maybe that's why I'm always trying to help people. Deep down I always knew that I wasn't going anywhere and that I might be able to help other people. Anyway that's how it is. I don't really know how to see life any other way.
I don't hate myself or anyone else. I got no burned bridges or enemies. And for all the time I took to finally gain some self-esteem and pride I ended up here alone with no use for either of these things. So I guess I'm just here. I hate feeling this way but I can't help it anymore. I listened to all that BS about things getting better for 7 years of my life and it never happened. Sure I got a little wiser and helped some people out but my life never really changed. I'm still the same miserable zombie I always was. I'm not angry about it anymore. I guess I've given up caring since that won't help anything. Caring never did anything for me. It helped others though and that's good.
But these days I just don't see a future for me anymore. Maybe that's why I'm always trying to help people. Deep down I always knew that I wasn't going anywhere and that I might be able to help other people. Anyway that's how it is. I don't really know how to see life any other way.