Situation at work

I need to vent a little to make sure these thoughts don't go and live their own life inside my head. Recieving feedback is nice so i figured i'd post it on here.

People who know me well know that i haven't worked for long, and now people who don't know me well know that too. Oh joy! Anyway, i have been the biggest retard you've ever seen today, except that you didn't see me. Messed up alot at work, resulting in the once friendly atmosphere to change into me being laughed at an ignored. The mistakes i made are things that i should've have figured out by myself, since any three year old could do that. No that's not an exeggeration.

I felt ashamed of myself and could only think of leaving the place as soon as possible, but i didn't. I tried to regain myself and see what i could do. I ended up working late to regain my honour somewhat, and i feel a bit better about it all now. Tommorow i'll just have to use more logic sense to regain the rest of my honour, problem is the two people who were annoyed the most aren't at work tommorow, so i'm not sure what to do. I guess i will simply keep working well and avoid making mistakes, and see where that leads me.

Now after writing this i'm not sure what to expect from you guys, other than the mandatory "grow up" since stuff like this probably happens all the time at work.

Thanks for reading.

Been there, done that.

Not sure what happened, but I know I've been in situations where looking back it's like, FACEPALM, why was I so stoopid and not see that. In the heat of the moment I get blinkered and just mess up.

Sounds like you're doing all you can, what more can you do?

Just be assured you are not the first nor the last to mess up.

You seem like you're already going about it maturely
New work can be stressful. Scratch that, any work can be stressful. In addition, everyone has good days and bad days. My productivity at work is so extremely different from day to day, I try not to think much about it, just give the best I can at the time.

Rosebolt said:

problem is the two people who were annoyed the most aren't at work tommorow, so i'm not sure what to do.

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Sounds like you wana impress them, yeah?

BrokenInside said:

Sounds like you wana impress them, yeah?

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Good catch, i need to root out any form of care for people in real life. Apart from a select few, that is. So i need to work on that. Thanks for letting me know.

Don't be so hard on yourself. You obviously care about your job and they will see that eventually. I think it's good you stayed late, shows commitment, but don't overextend yourself because those people make you feel insecure!

What exactly happened, Rosebolt, if you don't mind me asking?
If you don't feel like saying, that's okay.

As what perfanoff said, you did carry on maturely, not blaming others or insulting them. Well yeah you went the other way to sort of get into their good books but that's only cos you knew what it was like to be on good terms with them. I admit, I'd do that myself with some of the people in the past. But now I realise that I really couldn't give a honeysuckle to do more just to impress the others. It's quite taxing physically and emotionally. I hope things pick up for you though.

I've never known anyone to rant about a problem and not actually say what it is haha

I'm not quite sure what's gone on there, but as far as I can tell you're fixated on making a good impression. This should only go as far as your profession, what other people think has nothing to do with anything. You go there, work and go home.

People make mistakes from day to day that's life, sure you feel a bit honeysuckle for doing it but it's not like it lasts. It just sounds like you had a crappy day today (or whenever it was), so come on here, spam the games as usual and feel better; tomorrows a new day, you'll feel better after you've slept.

9006 said:

I've never known anyone to rant about a problem and not actually say what it is haha

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Some people do! I've tried! Lol.

Since you don't deny having acted stupidly- laugh it off! Make fun of yourself in a self ironic way. I found self irony always useful. Well, easy for me: I never ever make any mistakes, of course.

Update:

So, today was to be another day at work, but again with the person that laughed at me and the other person i annoyed. Apparently this scared me so much that i chickened out and called sick for work today.

Alot of self loathing in my system now, i should've easily be able to do this. So now i need t redeem myself somehow, so i will emberras myself this evening at the dinner table by saying i didn't go and explaining why. My parents are sure to talk me down even more.

I have no regrets of doing this, i would do it again, but i find it really hard to respect my decision, i'm, nothing but a weak coward, in my eyes.

Gah, just needed to let this out.

Rosebolt said:

With the person that laughed at me and the other person i annoyed.

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I'm sure they're not perfect. They've probably made mistakes before.

Think about all those ones who have made mistakes in the past. I'm sure this happens everywhere, all the time. Nobody's perfect and they're not the exception.

Just go to work as usual and act as if nothing happened. They'll forget it soon.

And I agree with everyone here: don't try to impress them. It's not worth it.

EDIT: If they end up perceiving that this situation has affected you, OMG, they're gonna use it to prey on you.

^ Yeah, I actually agree with Gondwanaland. You could just let it go and forget it.. they will soon follow. *hugs*

I couldn't go into work today either, and called in. Luckily, my work is really understanding, and my parents don't keep track of my shift schedule. But I know I called in sick, and I feel like a failure because of it.

But all we can do is take a deep breath and not beat ourselves up and do better tomorrow. And if we don't, to try the next day.

Rosebolt, I'm know you can do it, from all I've learned from you here I'm sure you have the strength. It may seem hard, but you can do it buddy. Everyone makes mistakes, as others have said no one's perfect. Just focus on your job, doing the task in hand to the best of your ability and who can judge you for that?

PS - I also rang in sick today, so that's three of us!

Come on!! These things happen, don't let em get to you. I made a mistake during my internship but luckily the patient survived. That was a horrible event of my life. You are braver than you think. Its your learning period. Nobody's gonna judge you. How would you learn if you don't make mistakes?
Cheer up bro! *hugs*

Thanks guys! I do feel alot better now. My parents weren't even mad at me, that was a great thing as well, just had a long good conversation with them and some helper dude.

Sorry to hear about that mistake BrokenInside, sure makes me look like a little whiner! No but really, i'm alright now, and will be for a long time!

I hope it didn't bother anyone!

9006 said:

I'm not quite sure what's gone on there, but as far as I can tell you're fixated on making a good impression. This should only go as far as your profession, what other people think has nothing to do with anything. You go there, work and go home.

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Don't agree, work takes up a lot of our lives. How colleagues feel about us does matter, there's no point in pretending otherwise.

OP; everyone does stupid head stuff, I sure have. Thought I was going to get fired for a while. Anxiety, probably around the new environment, is like a mental block. Just forget it and if they won't then that's their problem.