randomdude
Well-known member
- Joined
- Nov 29, 2012
- Messages
- 111
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I am 18 with no desire to continue living, i am always feeling lonely even when i am with friends. I am jealous, i hate everything about myself. I am depressed, anxious, failure at school, failure with girls, i have no confidence and i have no money for anything except for food. I have a weird retarded ghostly anxious presence that is ruining my already bad image in eyes of others but that presence is gone when i am sober. My hips are a little wider than my shoulders and its not noticable at all but that makes me feel like i am not a man at all. I look though and tall but i am weak little pussy that can't bench more than 130 pounds even after 8 months of gym. EVEN though i hate everything about myself i still don't wanna commit suicide but sometimes i really feel like i could atleast be hit by a bus or some other heavy vehicle. My brain never rests even when i sleep go into heavy discussions with whoever is near by and i talk about world issues and sometimes even football and i have no memory of that, this might sound funny but i am dead afraid that i will start talking about some homosexual things and be labeled as one cuz of that...