I'm afraid of physical affection but I want it badly

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surrealist

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I’m 19. I’ve only been in one relationship, and I’m not quite sure what I want in my life. I've never really liked being touched by anyone (even when it was my girlfriend). I want to be in another relationship for some reason. Maybe it’s the instability I’m feeling right now but I want to feel affection, even though I’m also terrified of it. What should I do right now?
 
Hard to say. When I was young, I never could handle any physical contact with anyone, not even a hug. My mom got headbutted once when I was in college because she snuck up on me and tried to get a hug.
I wasn't ready to physical contact until my mid-30's. Ironically I found someone to date who ended up hating physical contact and pushed me away since she knew I wanted more.

I'm dying to know what it's like to have physical contact. Someone to hold in my arms. Someone that wants to be near me.

Unfortunately I have no advise for you.
 
So is this the thought of being intimate, or actual physical contact? If the latter it could be Aphenphosmphobia.

My advice would be to just start off small, and see how you feel. Physically close, very light touching, maybe holding hands etc.. and try and build yourself up like that.

surrealist said:
I’m 19. I’ve only been in one relationship, and I’m not quite sure what I want in my life. I've never really liked being touched by anyone (even when it was my girlfriend). I want to be in another relationship for some reason. Maybe it’s the instability I’m feeling right now but I want to feel affection, even though I’m also terrified of it. What should I do right now?
 
surrealist said:
I’m 19. I’ve only been in one relationship, and I’m not quite sure what I want in my life. I've never really liked being touched by anyone (even when it was my girlfriend). I want to be in another relationship for some reason. Maybe it’s the instability I’m feeling right now but I want to feel affection, even though I’m also terrified of it. What should I do right now?

Do you know what it is about the affection that frightens you? Do you know where the fear is coming from? You may have to think on it for a while.
 

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