Can you smile while your heart don't?

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lonelybeauty

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I'm a Belly Dancer and many times as a performer I had to smile even when my heart was in tears... It is an art to fake your real feelings.
I learn to do that real well because I believe that with my smile I can make you feel better about yourself and even make you believe how special you are.

Are you able to make people believe that you are not LONELY or sad?
Next time you think about it try to do it smile not with your real heart or feelings but smile with that side of you that it is so lonely and lost that has no meaning to smile...I know it sounds wired but it is fun show the world that you are strong and don't let ever anybody see your real YOU!!! This will make you stronger and stronger...

Let me know how do you deal with your sad heart I would love to hear your recepie of a fake SMILE :D

Lonely Beauty

  
 
I can relate, sister i used to be a stripper..and I had to fake a smile and fake being happy every time..but I would get drunk and high to ease my pain ..my heart was dying and broken..I would tell myself it's all a game...That was many years ago but I still feel the pain in my heart each day..I suffer from depression and daily overwhelming saddness of just living..and I am so lonely because I don't think anyone understands...I have so many regrets...i,m a mess
 
I fully relate to what you are both saying, it's like every one but me is of the mindset that myself and everyone aroud me is entitled to my acceptance and respect/love/sexual desire and that all they have to to is act in a way that suggest they would like to get physical, if I don't react,you know the way a "normal" man reacts when some one throws themselves at me, which always seems to happen when there is an audience, then I'm wierd. Is it just me who finds this dishonest type of behaviour? What I mean by dishonest...I guess just comes from observing that it never seem real heartfelt, it only seems more like a show to prove how in control they are, yet underneath you can see that it is never that way when you are alone with them, only awkward feelings and me left wondering why yet one more time I ended up spending time alone with someone who only wanted to see what kind of good time I could show them, without feeling any sort of desire or responsibilty to to make me feel in anyway that they actually wanted me around other than making it obvious that they had nothing better to do, you know why not me. Here I am. entertain me, show me why this wasen't a waste of my time...blah blah blah. Hope this isn't over the top...anyway.
 
Yeah I can smile when my heart doesn't. That's the only way people don't know how lonely I am.Not depressed, I am loved. Just not understood. To many things I just don't understand myself, I guess, for me to really connect with people. I hope I'm not just a lost cause or a sociopath. Sometimes I feel like whats wrong with me is nothing more than a true ability. to emphithize with people. The only thing that tells me different, and I have to hold on to is that I am actually loved and cared for by a great many people.Why a can't let myself believe it all the time is beyond me. Maybe it's because there seem to be more and more people completely and proudly intent on showing what monster they can be, you know, how connected they are with there animal instincts, while I feel like i'm just trying to show everybody that I'm not a monster, just a normal caring person that actually cares if the people around me are happy and confortable and secure.
 
Its funny how any guy would be elated if a nice looking girl came up to him and started to chat, at least I am, but for some reason girls like to stonewall people who do this either because they are cold and distant or are convinced that just because they are beautiful, someone has an ulterior motive for approaching them. And they would be right about the last part, but this is what makes reproduction possible and girls dont seem to understand that. Oh and if youre a belly dancer this makes you in all likelihood one of the beautiful girls i was talking about. If you see a guy you like just smile at him, the chances are he wont because most men dont expect to illicit responses from girls by doing the same. Good luck
 
keeper said:
I think I can't smile so easily...

If I make eye contact with a girl and make a little smirk how can i possibly know that shes interested if she just looks away? Smiling is the most important part!
 
I'm always telling my closest friends that I'm fine even though I'm usually heartbroken, lonely, and/or an emotional wreck inside. I'm not good at smiling and my friends are always too busy for me but that's beside the point.
 
I'm also good in the art of fake-smiling :D

My therapist actually says that's the problem. He says that I don't show the real me to people - the real me which is mad at people for not noticing it. He also says that's why I cannot let anyone know me, because for letting someone know you, you should show a real you and not a fake smile.
 
I can't do it, what I feel is what shows on my face. We need in some situations to wear such smiley face, I tried a lot, but I couldn't.
 
I think everyone does the fake smile. I do it everyday. When someone upsets me I smile, and when some one makes me angry, I laugh. There's also the occasion where I am meeting new people. Whatever mood I'm in, I smile. I think we learn at a young age that smiling and laughing are the socially acceptable thing to do. We train ourselves to act how we think we are supposed to act.
Have you ever noticed, that when someone hears a joke, they will laugh and at the same time look at the other people in the room to see if they are laughing? You know something is truley funny, if you are sitting in a room by yourself, and you are still laughing. We develop a social laugh (hahaha,hehehe), and then there's the natural uncontrollable laughter (the good stuff). The real uncontrollable laughter makes your eyes water and your stomach hurt, and afterwards, you feel like you just got a work out.
Don't fret lonely beauty, we all have a little bit of sociopath inside of us. A lot of people smile when they really don't want to, especially at work. It's how they hide what's bothering them. I try to be as real as possible, but there are many situations that I've encountered where I feel like I'm required to turn on the fake switch.
 
Definitely - I work in a gym and it's part of my job to be happy so the members will be motivated to be happy to be there too. It does come with a cost though, as every day after work I feel exhausted from having to be what I'm not for six to nine hours.
 
i don't know why, but since i became lonely, it's always been like faking my smile, i used to be a cheerful person and so on, but when problems appeared i tried to find comfort in my "friends" to tell them my problems and how i feel, but i soon realised they don't need my like this, crying on their shoulders and i became even lonelier, i lost a lot of friends, now i fake my smile everyday and i don't even realise it...sometimes thought i just don't have any more power to smile, so i just show them all how i feel, nobody cares i now this but i don't care either what they think anymore...

a kiss and a big smile!
 
not bothering if people know am sad but i been working in tourism feilds and the most important part of my work was my smile ,,,, i dont know if u ever looked in the mirorr to see hows ur smile looks when u sad , its faded and if u looked deeply u see its not true thing but the problem is noone looking deeply most of us care about surfaces nothing more if u smile so u happy ,, other thing am sure its so useful if people know that u sad may be theyll help u or u think this is a dignity matter the whole univrse is built on every thing  needs every thing , we all need god help and blessing ,moons needs suns bars and lovers need the moon ,,,,, and we need sometimes another hand to wrip out our tears ( i hope that my poor english isnot bothering u )
 
Wow, I wish I could fake smile, it would really help me when I'm upset and I try to hide it from my parents. Instead they just scream at me since I cry way to much. :(

I never smile, except for when I laugh, which I hardly ever do. I worry teachers since I never smile and cry often in class. I also scare all the other students away from me...
 
a fake smile may be good- if you cant make yourself happy then at least it could make someone else happy. I've had plenty of horrible days that were saved by someone else's smile.
Even if your not happy, a smile can still be genuine.
 
Hello, I am new here and I know what all of you are saying..to convince other's your doing fine when on the inside you are slowly dieing. How you somehow manage to get through another day when all I want to do is lay down and quit....I am one of those who say when I go to my gym everyone says 'hi' I am popular there and everyone thinks I am a ok ..a few people know of some of my problems, but noone could begin to understand how lonely and dead I feel inside....I understand what all of you feel.
 
I feel disgusted with myself for the fake face I present to the public......everyone I know thinks of me as the quiet, dignified, polite person that does good in school, always lends a helping hand when asked, and will always give you a positive, reasuring message about the way your life is going. In reality, although I enjoy being kind to people, I really wish I didn't have to always act like such a happy lappy funcake. What? Do the people I talk to actually think I enjoy being alone most of the time? Do they think I like the fact that I'll never experience what it means to love someone? Do they think I don't mind it that nobody ever comes up to talk with me? It's unfortunate that nobody I know in this world understands what a cynical person I've become. OUCH! Ughh...what was that? Oh, just a sharp pain in my chest, my doctor said my hearts getting colder.
 
we sometimes have to fake our smiles, i brought up to do that. i bet everybody in this universe does that. sometimes we have to. or even laugh, laughter can be an escape from being depressed. for me i sometime feel so sad i cant cry anymore so there is no other option but to laugh it off. crazy?? maybe, but if it makes me feel better, why not?
 
Ok, I've never been a stripper or a belly dancer - although I wouldn't mind being pretty like one. But any profession dealing with people is the same. My background is sales - and I have always felt like I was on stage. All those positive attitude books I've read - all those "fake" smiles I put on.. Working and smiling - and going through the motions. I once had a customer that made a comment to a fellow worker. The customer said that I must have such a wonderful life because I am always so happy. My co-worker nearly choked on his lunch.

The problem with friends is, they expect me to be that same person I am at work. I am terrified to be myself because friends, and even my husband - have been pushed away by me. I didn't think I complained any more than anyone else in my life has.. I have always been there for them... but when it is my turn - nobody wants to hear it. Now, I hide the real me for fear of losing friends and being alone.
 

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