My dreaded birthday...

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Lavant

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I don't mind being alone. If anything, I quite prefer it. I am given ample time to do what I want and think about whatever I want to think about. I sometimes even go out on day trips alone, my sole companions being a notepad, pen and headphones.

But it all gets to me when the birthday comes around. That one **** day of the year.

For the last 3 years, I have spent my birthday alone, without anyone, in my room watching a film. For me, birthdays are a time to reflect on what has been achieved over the last year, what you want to achieve during the next year and well... get depressed about it. I wake up the next morning feel very motivated for life.

When I hear about others birthday's, their friends organising big parties and taking them out, paying for them, giving them an evening of great fun, it doesn't depress me, but makes me long for something more than what I have. Never have I had someone throw a party for me or take me out!

I genuinely wonder how one can make friends like this. I don't particularly understand it!

I'm really not looking forward to my birthday in the next 2 months. I never do.

Does anyone else feel this way? Spend their birthdays alone?
 
I usually spend it with my family...Me a cake and presents...I never really made good friends like that who'd do that for me... :/ It's kinda sad but I'm quiet content with my family...I don't get depressed because people DO wish me even when I turn off my fb reminder so my wall won't be spammed by people I've hardly talked to...It's just a birthday anyways... I really wish I could get you a cake or something on your birthday...You shouldn't spend it alone.... When's your birthday exactly? :)
 
Sounds like your mixing your birthday up with new year.

To be honest if you did have friends that would throw parties, I don't think they would for you. Only because of all the reasons you mentioned above, you seem to use your birthday as a tool rather than a celebration; I'm not saying weather that's right or wrong, by the way, I don't really care how you use your birthday but to other people they may see this.
 
I take a day off work, go into town and treat myself to something !

At least it's something.
 
I always dread my birthday too. I usually just sit around feeling sorry for myself. It'll be different this year.

If spending your birthday reflecting on what you've achieved and getting depressed isn't working Lavant, you should try something new. Go treat yourself like duff does, or do something you've always wanted to do but haven't had a chanch. You don't need a big party to have a good birthday.
 
Yes, go out and treat yourself to something you really want. I've spent several birthdays alone and usually get myself a local all day bus and rail ticket and then I go to a couple of places I hardly ever go to, and I make myslef something nice to eat when I get back home. To be honest, it isn't as satisfying as being with someone who wants to make the day nice for you, but it's better than sitting alone at home.
 
9006 said:
Jéssica Soares said:
Why do you say that? o_O

Because of the reasons I mentioned.

Right, I guess I misunderstood you.
Still I think you're wrong. I mean, I'm speaking based on my personal experience. I don't use my birthday as a tool like you said but I don't really care about that day and still my friends insist to do something for me.

So, speaking now to Lavant, I guess it's not just how you see your birthday but also how much your friends care about it or about you. I'm not trying to make you feel bad, not at all... but you see, even when I ask my friends to don't do anything, when I say to them that I don't want to celebrate... they do it anyway, in one way or another. So, I'm talking based in what happens with me. I think it's not "you're fault", if you know what I mean...
 
Jéssica Soares said:
So, speaking now to Lavant, I guess it's not just how you see your birthday but also how much your friends care about it or about you. I'm not trying to make you feel bad, not at all... but you see, even when I ask my friends to don't do anything, when I say to them that I don't want to celebrate... they do it anyway, in one way or another. So, I'm talking based in what happens with me. I think it's not "you're fault", if you know what I mean...

The same thing happens to me. I tell people I don't want anyone to do anything for my birthday and they dismiss my wishes as if I "really do" want it. It's one of the most disrespectful things people have done to me.

"No, Case. We're going to ignore your wishes because they are stupid and idiotic. You're going to do what WE say because it pleases us. We don't care if it makes you uncomfortable because your birthday is not even about you. It's about US. So, get with the program."

One time, after telling co-workers that I didn't want my cubicle decorated, guess what happened? They decorated my cubicle anyway. I removed all of the decorations before my co-workers got into the building and got some very confused reactions. That's what you get when you ignore the wishes of the "Birthday Boy." lol
 
I really hate that. Despite the fact that they may 'mean well', the way they COMPLETELY ignore one's wishes is a form of disrespect. I wish they would understand that. -SY
 
I used to love my birthday until i turned 21, for the last 4 years i have hated it i dread the thought of my 26th and its still 9 months away.

This year i crawled under my blanket and didn't come out for the whole day.

I plan on either doing the same next year or taking myself away on holiday to be alone.
 
Case said:
Jéssica Soares said:
So, speaking now to Lavant, I guess it's not just how you see your birthday but also how much your friends care about it or about you. I'm not trying to make you feel bad, not at all... but you see, even when I ask my friends to don't do anything, when I say to them that I don't want to celebrate... they do it anyway, in one way or another. So, I'm talking based in what happens with me. I think it's not "you're fault", if you know what I mean...

The same thing happens to me. I tell people I don't want anyone to do anything for my birthday and they dismiss my wishes as if I "really do" want it. It's one of the most disrespectful things people have done to me.

"No, Case. We're going to ignore your wishes because they are stupid and idiotic. You're going to do what WE say because it pleases us. We don't care if it makes you uncomfortable because your birthday is not even about you. It's about US. So, get with the program."

One time, after telling co-workers that I didn't want my cubicle decorated, guess what happened? They decorated my cubicle anyway. I removed all of the decorations before my co-workers got into the building and got some very confused reactions. That's what you get when you ignore the wishes of the "Birthday Boy." lol

Well, I think you can't see things that way... I mean, I believe they do it with the best intentions... maybe they think you're just being "modest" when you say you don't really want a party. Everyone like parties in a general way, and probably they think you like too and they're your friends, they do it for you, because they think it'll be good for you... I think the best you can do is enjoy it as much as you can, take it as a good thing, that's what I do but I like parties xD
Well, I know what you mean, but I understand your friends too because I'm like you when I'm the birthday girl and I'm like them when I'm the friend, you know xD
 

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