D
DemonsInside
Guest
This is part 4 in my many part serious on how to untwist our thinking.
Some of you have probably read the first 3 parts and have considered or thought about starting on the road to untwist your thinking. Some of you are probably skeptic which is natural. For those of yow who are thinking about starting, have started, or just want more information, read on:
1.) Beginning For many of us, starting is the hardest step or convincing ourselves if we have a problem. A few questions you can yourself:
a.) Is this adversely affecting my health and my relationships? You are the most important person in your life. If you're not functioning or healthy, then you can't effectively take care of your kids, or your signifcant other. For those of us who don't have kids or an S.O. then consider how will this effect my ability to do so in the future? For those of us who currently do have kids and/or an S.O. Remember you cannot take care of others effectively if you're not taking care of yourself, first.
b.) Is this adversely affecting my job/job performance?
This was a hard one for me personally. Working with the public for 8 hours a day while being severely depressed was hell, but necessary. Life does not take a time out if you do. Your job is important. Money may not seem important, but it is. Money is a secondary reinforcer, which purchases primary reinforcers such as food, shelter, etc. Sometimes we forget how important our job is, or how our fellow employees or higher-ups will understand what we are going through. We are often told to just suck it up and unfortunately this is the wrong response. Talk to your fellow employees or higher-ups about what is going on. If you're not comfortable doing so, contact Human Resources, this is what they are there for and what you tell them will be held confidental in accordance to HIPAA.
c.) Do I want to change?
This seems like a no brainer, but really you need to ask yourself how much you're being influenced by others to change. You have to want to change for yourself, not for others.
2.) How to start:
a.) Starting is hard for a lot of us because we don't have the energy to expel. See your doctor or physician. They can prescribe medication to help with your loss of energy and depression. Medication is not a cure all. It helps with the symptoms, and not the real, underlying problem. Some of us do have chemical imbalances, but for others, there's a real, more tangible reason. It may take your doctor a while to find a medication or combo of different meds before any change is seen. Personally it took a combination of 5 different medications before I noticed any significant change. Also, do not always expect a change over night, it may take 6-8 weeks for some medication to build up in your system and begin to take effect, don't become discouraged! Play an active role in your well being.
B.) The thought of therapy or seeing a profession counselor or psychiatrist scares a lot of us and it did me as well. Hell, even the idea of being seen by people I know going to the building the office was located in was a scary thought. Counseling can be effective for many individuals:
1.) Talking: Seems simple enough, but getting our problems out in the open is a good way to start, but talking to someone who is neutral and unbiased is most beneficial because they won't be saying what you want to hear.
2.) Security: Another big issue for us is we don't trust people very easily. A counselor is legally bound by HIPAA. What you tell them with the exception of a few things is kept between you and them. Exceptions include: Planning or in the instance of hurting yourself, Plans or threats to hurt other individuals, Sexual abuse on children as well as physical abuse. These are generally what they are legally bound to tell the proper authorities about, generally everything else is between you and them. It may take a while for you to feel comfortable with the counselor. This is completely normal and they are aware of this too.
For the maximum amount of help, you have to be honest with them.
3.) Individualization: You and I are not the same, what works for me, might not work for you. A counselor or therapist can help you develop a plan that will benefit you the most. Do note that they won't and cannot do the work for you. They will guide you, but you have to put forth the time and effort to change yourself around.
4.) Medication: Some therapists and all Psychiatrists are familiar with and can prescribe the proper medication better then your General Doctor. This is what they went the extra few years to school for. They know how to monitor your medication, they can increase the dosage, or decrease it, they can tell generally much quicker then your General Doctor can if it's working. (Only you can tell for sure if it's working. Play an active roll in your recovery.)
C.) Reach Out, if, Possible: Family and friends are some of the most important people to have close to you during your hard times. It is natural for us to pull away from them because we think they won't understand how we feel, or we do not trust them. If possible talk to them, reach for them. This is where they will show their true colors (some of us might be shocked, just a warning.) For those of us who really, trully have no one tell your therapist or doctor, they will help you, they will tell you to contact them whenever, some may give you their own personal numbers (rare, but I had it happen to me, once.)
D.) Staying Healthy:
a.)Try to eat well, I know it is hard if you don't have a lot of money, time, or energy.
b.)Sun light provides vitamin D, which is essential. It also has proven benefits on our mood and provides energy.
c.)Exercising releases endorphines which can elevate our mood and keeps us in shape.
d.)Invest in a multi-vitamin. Depression takes a toll on our body and when were not eating well, it hits us two-fold. A good multi-vitamin can help in areas we our deficient in.
e.)Personal hygiene is often neglected when we are lonely and/or depressed. Don't forget to take care of yourself, you're the most important person in your steps to recovery. Brush/Floss your teeth, shower/bathe, cut your nails, get a hair cut, clean the wax from your ears, Wear deodorant, Change/wash your clothes, keep your bedroom, or domicile clean, take out the trash (it became so bad for me, that I actually would keep trashbags in my house, full ones for months at a time.)
E.) Getting Immediate Help:
1.) Self-injurious, suicidial idealizations, injuring others: Call someone, get out of the house immediately, get to a safe place, get into a public place.
2.) Wanting help, but unable to do it yourself:
a.) Some of us want help, but our ashamed to do it ourselves, or we lack the energy to do so. If possible or needed call 911, contact someone who has authority over you, Such as: parents, or a spouse. Sometimes all you need is someone to start the ball rolling. (Personally, I had my wife contact the proper authorities, so yes it is possible.)
These are some of the things you can do to initialize your steps to recovery, taking care of yourself, and answering some questions you may have. In my next installment I will discuss what generally happens when you have suicidial idealizations (A plan and thoughts of killing yourself.) and go for help like the E.R. or a safe place.
Some of you have probably read the first 3 parts and have considered or thought about starting on the road to untwist your thinking. Some of you are probably skeptic which is natural. For those of yow who are thinking about starting, have started, or just want more information, read on:
1.) Beginning For many of us, starting is the hardest step or convincing ourselves if we have a problem. A few questions you can yourself:
a.) Is this adversely affecting my health and my relationships? You are the most important person in your life. If you're not functioning or healthy, then you can't effectively take care of your kids, or your signifcant other. For those of us who don't have kids or an S.O. then consider how will this effect my ability to do so in the future? For those of us who currently do have kids and/or an S.O. Remember you cannot take care of others effectively if you're not taking care of yourself, first.
b.) Is this adversely affecting my job/job performance?
This was a hard one for me personally. Working with the public for 8 hours a day while being severely depressed was hell, but necessary. Life does not take a time out if you do. Your job is important. Money may not seem important, but it is. Money is a secondary reinforcer, which purchases primary reinforcers such as food, shelter, etc. Sometimes we forget how important our job is, or how our fellow employees or higher-ups will understand what we are going through. We are often told to just suck it up and unfortunately this is the wrong response. Talk to your fellow employees or higher-ups about what is going on. If you're not comfortable doing so, contact Human Resources, this is what they are there for and what you tell them will be held confidental in accordance to HIPAA.
c.) Do I want to change?
This seems like a no brainer, but really you need to ask yourself how much you're being influenced by others to change. You have to want to change for yourself, not for others.
2.) How to start:
a.) Starting is hard for a lot of us because we don't have the energy to expel. See your doctor or physician. They can prescribe medication to help with your loss of energy and depression. Medication is not a cure all. It helps with the symptoms, and not the real, underlying problem. Some of us do have chemical imbalances, but for others, there's a real, more tangible reason. It may take your doctor a while to find a medication or combo of different meds before any change is seen. Personally it took a combination of 5 different medications before I noticed any significant change. Also, do not always expect a change over night, it may take 6-8 weeks for some medication to build up in your system and begin to take effect, don't become discouraged! Play an active role in your well being.
B.) The thought of therapy or seeing a profession counselor or psychiatrist scares a lot of us and it did me as well. Hell, even the idea of being seen by people I know going to the building the office was located in was a scary thought. Counseling can be effective for many individuals:
1.) Talking: Seems simple enough, but getting our problems out in the open is a good way to start, but talking to someone who is neutral and unbiased is most beneficial because they won't be saying what you want to hear.
2.) Security: Another big issue for us is we don't trust people very easily. A counselor is legally bound by HIPAA. What you tell them with the exception of a few things is kept between you and them. Exceptions include: Planning or in the instance of hurting yourself, Plans or threats to hurt other individuals, Sexual abuse on children as well as physical abuse. These are generally what they are legally bound to tell the proper authorities about, generally everything else is between you and them. It may take a while for you to feel comfortable with the counselor. This is completely normal and they are aware of this too.
For the maximum amount of help, you have to be honest with them.
3.) Individualization: You and I are not the same, what works for me, might not work for you. A counselor or therapist can help you develop a plan that will benefit you the most. Do note that they won't and cannot do the work for you. They will guide you, but you have to put forth the time and effort to change yourself around.
4.) Medication: Some therapists and all Psychiatrists are familiar with and can prescribe the proper medication better then your General Doctor. This is what they went the extra few years to school for. They know how to monitor your medication, they can increase the dosage, or decrease it, they can tell generally much quicker then your General Doctor can if it's working. (Only you can tell for sure if it's working. Play an active roll in your recovery.)
C.) Reach Out, if, Possible: Family and friends are some of the most important people to have close to you during your hard times. It is natural for us to pull away from them because we think they won't understand how we feel, or we do not trust them. If possible talk to them, reach for them. This is where they will show their true colors (some of us might be shocked, just a warning.) For those of us who really, trully have no one tell your therapist or doctor, they will help you, they will tell you to contact them whenever, some may give you their own personal numbers (rare, but I had it happen to me, once.)
D.) Staying Healthy:
a.)Try to eat well, I know it is hard if you don't have a lot of money, time, or energy.
b.)Sun light provides vitamin D, which is essential. It also has proven benefits on our mood and provides energy.
c.)Exercising releases endorphines which can elevate our mood and keeps us in shape.
d.)Invest in a multi-vitamin. Depression takes a toll on our body and when were not eating well, it hits us two-fold. A good multi-vitamin can help in areas we our deficient in.
e.)Personal hygiene is often neglected when we are lonely and/or depressed. Don't forget to take care of yourself, you're the most important person in your steps to recovery. Brush/Floss your teeth, shower/bathe, cut your nails, get a hair cut, clean the wax from your ears, Wear deodorant, Change/wash your clothes, keep your bedroom, or domicile clean, take out the trash (it became so bad for me, that I actually would keep trashbags in my house, full ones for months at a time.)
E.) Getting Immediate Help:
1.) Self-injurious, suicidial idealizations, injuring others: Call someone, get out of the house immediately, get to a safe place, get into a public place.
2.) Wanting help, but unable to do it yourself:
a.) Some of us want help, but our ashamed to do it ourselves, or we lack the energy to do so. If possible or needed call 911, contact someone who has authority over you, Such as: parents, or a spouse. Sometimes all you need is someone to start the ball rolling. (Personally, I had my wife contact the proper authorities, so yes it is possible.)
These are some of the things you can do to initialize your steps to recovery, taking care of yourself, and answering some questions you may have. In my next installment I will discuss what generally happens when you have suicidial idealizations (A plan and thoughts of killing yourself.) and go for help like the E.R. or a safe place.
