What are you feeling, hoping, thinking, or remembering right now?

I'm sad and lonely t

What are you feeling, hoping, thinking, or remembering right now?

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I can't put what I think about, what I feel, and what I reminisce about into a cogent sentence, it's just one massive spaghetti junction of aimless thoughts to be honest.

Strong and determined.

i'm a free man.

Sometimes I get this picture in my mind of me fading away. I dissolve into this mass of pixels detaching from one another and getting taken away by the wind.

please and thank you.

Guilty.
I was rude to someone I shouldn't have been.

Ok, I didn't see this coming.

Its been years since we last met. I am suddenly missing her.

I want another dog so **** bad. 
Just thinking about all that puppy cuteness is almost love overdose
Even cleaning up the bathroom fails seems so good right now.

I just hope he's not in as much pain with lonliness as I was as a teen.I just hate the thought of it.I've tried but just can't help.It's just not fair

I really don't like it when someone tells me how I feel or what I am. I know I'm human and flawed and my views of myself can be skewed, but I think I'm at least quite certain and self-aware of my own feelings and thoughts.... better than anyone else.

This day. 
So glad it's over soon. 
******* worst day ever.

What the devil did I do with my pen... I had it ten seconds ago... Swear this stuff sprouts legs and walks away when I'm not looking.

kaetic said:

What the devil did I do with my pen... I had it ten seconds ago... Swear this stuff sprouts legs and walks away when I'm not looking.

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Lol yeah we buy a big pack of Biros every month or so, stick them in a pot in the kitchen and guess what they all disappear like socks in the washing machine...real mystery it is

Ah it's Sunday what shall I do now that troubles chosen church over a morning with me  . Take the boy for a bike ride because they are rebuilding the gym or have another coffee and chill out in bed ummmmmm Nah put the roasties on ....stop with the laziness.

[img=498x278]https://media1.tenor.com/images/83d6e995860e263aa4cb0150dd8526ab/tenor.gif?itemid=5430101[/img]

I walk a lonely road
The only one that I have ever known
Don't know where it goes
But it's only me, and I walk alone
I walk this empty street
On the boulevard of broken dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I'm the only one, and I walk alone
I walk alone, I walk alone
I walk alone and I walk a
My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
Till then I walk alone
Ah ah ah ah ah
Ah ah ah ah ah
I'm walking down the line
That divides me somewhere in my mind
On the border line of the edge
And where I walk alone
Read between the lines
What's messed up and every thing's all right
Check my vital signs to know I'm still alive
And I walk alone
I walk alone, I walk alone
I walk alone…


This song is constantly playing in my head...

not without my spouse.

what would i do without my spouse.
i knew nobody is going to take care of me.
my spouse is the only one who could do that.
not even my own family.
not even the people around me.
not only they did not care, they also will try to ruin me.

i watched videos about people living alone and die alone.
people only knew then when they smell the body from their apartment.

i don't want to be like that.

i wish Allah give me proper death.

i once asked my spouse how is i'm going to die.
my spouse said just to console me, because nobody knows the future.
my spouse said, "you are going to die at old age, peaceful and you die when you sleeping".

there is higher then just love that is the truth.

Silence is thought devouring
Loneliness is soul draining
Life is only contempt for happiness
Mind falling deeper into a dark place
Life essence nearly empty
Desperately reaching toward light
Tormented screams go unheard

Trapped in a nightmare
Chained to the floor by fear
Broken spirit curled in the corner
Thoughts of relentless anguish
Tears dry and now empty
Numb is the only emotion
Existence is insignificant

.... I am feeling unwanted in every way