Lying about your virginity/previous relationships

So I'm a 24 year old guy and I've never had sex nor been in a relationship. Never even been kissed before. And I know this is considered super weird amongst most people nowadays. That's why I plan to lie about it when I have my first sexual encounter (which will hopefully be soon!).

So has anyone else done this? I have no intention of telling the first girl I have sex with that I am a virgin or that I've never been with a girl before. I feel like that it would just turn or off and she'd just think I'm a freak. Maybe, later on, if things get super serious, then I'll reveal it to her. This is just some stuff I've been thinking about recently, kind of preparing for the future lol

Also, related question: can a girl tell you're a virgin when she's having sex with you? Is there anything I can do to prevent her from thinking that way? Since I'd be doing it for the first time, I obviously wont be any good but I can always just attribute it to "I havent done this in a while"

I'm almost 31, and in your same position.

And yes, I would definitely lie about it, if it ever happens.

I didn't lie about it and everything turned out fine. I don't think there is any harm in lying about it though. honeysuckle, you'll probably laugh about it together further on down the road when/if you come clean.

Will the girl know? Maybe to some extent. "I haven't done this in a while" might not work because to be honest it's like riding a bike except you get better at it each time.

my advice if you are trying to seem like you are not a virgin: pay attention to here reactions to what you are doing. If she isn't getting into it switch technique. Don't go in like a jackhammer, you'll quickly blow your cover, and your... well you know.

I don't think you need to lie.

I was 20 when I lost mine to my ex-wife and she actually was more into me when she found out I was a virgin.

Anyway, it's going to be different with every person anyway.

It seems a lot more complicated in your imagination than it really is.

The most important thing is to not be a selfish lover, make sure they get off before you do, all the rest of it is just crap people make up to sell books and magazines.

If the girl likes you enough to have sex with you she isn't going to care about your past experience.

If she's the type that would judge you based on that then you wouldn't want to date her anyway.

It's really up to you though, plenty of girls lie about still being virgins when they aren't.

In Iranian culture where the men only like to marry virgins plenty of the women get surgery to have their hymen restored in order to pass as virgins.

I was 20 when I lost mine to my ex-wife and she actually was more into me when she found out I was a virgin.

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Good point. You always remember your first.

Don't lie about it. If you do, you're just setting yourself up for a rough time.... hurt for both of you eventually. Honesty is always the best policy, in my opinion.

umm...."I haven't done this in a while" is NOT going to fool a woman. Just saying...
Best not to lie about it.

You're not ready for a relationship if you're that insecure.

I think it is better to be open about it. A kind and caring girl would not give it a second thought.
I am in my fifties and if I met a man in my age range who was a virgin, it wouldn't put me off him at all. I am not a virgin but I only slept with a man for the first time in my late thirties, so I know that there must be plenty of people with no experience till later than many others.

Guys he said,

omarlittle said:

Maybe, later on, if things get super serious, then I'll reveal it to her.

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I think that he means it's just gonna be casual when he loses virginity. I think that begs the question; how much unnecessary truth do we really owe to strangers we interact with? Surely the most vulnerable things don't need to be known, right?

Well yeah. I think usually such intimate details you don't really bring up unless the other asks?

-Sai- said:

You're not ready for a relationship if you're that insecure.

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Yeah, I think he needs to wait at least another 10 years before a relationship. If he doesn't have one at 34, he can always wait till 40.

Batman55 said:

-Sai- said:

You're not ready for a relationship if you're that insecure.

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Yeah, I think he needs to wait at least another 10 years before a relationship. If he doesn't have one at 34, he can always wait till 40.

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Yes, I should wait until I'm 40. Ugh.

LeaningIntoTheMuse said:

Yes, I should wait until I'm 40. Ugh.

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That post of my mine was a bit on the sarcastic side. Regardless, who's to say you're not ready? And also, not every relationship has to be super-serious and longterm, eh?

Batman55 said:

LeaningIntoTheMuse said:

Yes, I should wait until I'm 40. Ugh.

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That post of my mine was a bit on the sarcastic side. Regardless, who's to say you're not ready? And also, not every relationship has to be super-serious and longterm, eh?

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I'm not ready to put myself in the position to be laughed at. That's the only reason I would lie.

If I didn't risk having the girl break up from me, or call me a freak, I would yell it from the mountaintops.

Just something to consider I knew a guy I used to work with who lied to the girl he was dating about being a virgin, when she found out 1 1/2 years later, she left him because she didn't want to be in a relationship that started with a lie. In my opinion honesty is the respectable choice. If you lie about that, what else will you lie about?

You could lie but only if it comes up. If it doesn't then avoid the topic altogether.

You may need to literally make up a previous relationship ; Maybe a short-term romance on the OE, something that can't be verified by friends.

Garbageman said:

Just something to consider I knew a guy I used to work with who lied to the girl he was dating about being a virgin, when she found out 1 1/2 years later, she left him because she didn't want to be in a relationship that started with a lie. In my opinion honesty is the respectable choice. If you lie about that, what else will you lie about?

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It's not an important thing to lie about, and I think it unlikely she dumped him for that reason.

I wouldn't lie about being a virgin. For one, it would just make me feel more comfortable if my partner knew. Plus, if I got to an opportunity to be sleeping with a woman, then, I have more respect for her than to lie ...

rdor said:

... about previous relationships as well. Literally make one up. Maybe a fling on your OE. Just make sure she doesn't talk to your friends about it.

That way you'll avoid the creepy-virgin-stalker/rapist stigma.

Garbageman said:

Just something to consider I knew a guy I used to work with who lied to the girl he was dating about being a virgin, when she found out 1 1/2 years later, she left him because she didn't want to be in a relationship that started with a lie. In my opinion honesty is the respectable choice. If you lie about that, what else will you lie about?

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It's not an important thing to lie about. She probably left him because he's a virgin.

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He wasn't a virgin after they had been sleeping together for a year and a half. If someone lies about one thing how do you know what else they will lie about? That is why she left.

He lied out of insecurity, which is understandable. Anyone who could end it for a reason like that can't have been into the person all that much to begin with.
She was probably looking for an excuse and found one.