How do you find the motivation?

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VeganAtheist

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Greetings,

How do you find the motivation to even attempt improving your situation?
I am having a very difficult time finding that motivation. I barely have the motivation to continue living.

I am near 30 and am quite lonely. I see no path out of this situation. Because of this, I am not motivated to even attempt improving on my situation.

Example: One of my main sources of loneliness is a lack of a mate. One potential improvement I could make is to lose weight. While I am not that big by American standards, women seem to prefer those who are more physically fit. But when I think about it, it probably will have little or no benefit for me.

The result is that sometimes when I am in the middle of working out, I get this rush of depressing thoughts and immediately want to go home and go to sleep. Or I simply just don't get out of bed or off the couch in the first place.
 
You might want to grab something like a treadmill that you can stick in front of the tv and walk while watching a movie or listening to music. This is what I did since I'm at home all the time and I pretty much can't get to a gym because they're a 30 minute drive both ways for me. I bought a cheap one on Overstock: http://www.overstock.com/search?key...S4CGYQVKCDLZLA&recidx=0&recalg=61&searchidx=0

It works ok and Overstock has good customer service. It folds up for easier storage against the wall.

You can't just give up on your life man. It's too precious to waste.
 
I hear you...Got the same problem these days. I wish I had some sure-fire technique to put fire in your belly. But motivation is not simple, & varies from one person to the next. For me, the hardest thing is taking that first step. But it is often easier once you're up & moving. One way to stick to fitness is to find it in an activity you like. If you're a runner then focus on that; stick to light weights at high repetitions & plenty of lower-body stretching. Have you ever played a team sport? Maybe you'd like baseball? Find out what's going on in your area. Once you're involved with someone else you have additional motivation, as there is someone to help you stick to a plan for your fitness goals. These are just a few ideas.
 
I have the EXACT same situation as you. I draw strength from friends. A lot of people don't have any, so I can't say if that's an option for you. I've got extremely low self esteem. I am also quite lonely when it comes to that area as well.

My suggestion is to take it slowly one day at a time, and to always think of the bigger picture.
 
This is one of the great mysteries, sometimes I also find myself with zero motivation. There's so much potential from everyone (including myself) that just goes to waste because of lack of motivation, and words don't seem to change that at all.

As I always say I wish you could buy it bottled from the shop; the market is there.
 
I know exactly what you mean and I also find it hard to keep motivated...one thing that I do is to keep making lists - I'm a bit of an organised nutter so ticking something off a list makes me feel better. I make daily, weekly and monthly goals to try stick to, though I don't manage all of them, I do tend to stick to some.

Also perhaps combining activities...for instance I usually bang food in the oven and whilst it is cooking do exercise until it is done. Or reward myself for tasks that I've done (if I get it done I'll allow myself to watch an episode of so & so or a cuppa & biscuit etc).

Remind yourself of what you want, where you want to be and how you want to change? Write it down somewhere you will see on a daily basis.

Good luck!!
 
My friend just insisted I join loseit.com. It's a dietary log website wrapped in a weight loss community. You set your weight, goal, and track your daily caloric intake. You might want to take a look at it. If you do join, feel free to add me as a friend. We can help keep each other going.
 
VeganAtheist said:
Greetings,

How do you find the motivation to even attempt improving your situation?
I am having a very difficult time finding that motivation. I barely have the motivation to continue living.

I am near 30 and am quite lonely. I see no path out of this situation. Because of this, I am not motivated to even attempt improving on my situation.

Example: One of my main sources of loneliness is a lack of a mate. One potential improvement I could make is to lose weight. While I am not that big by American standards, women seem to prefer those who are more physically fit. But when I think about it, it probably will have little or no benefit for me.

The result is that sometimes when I am in the middle of working out, I get this rush of depressing thoughts and immediately want to go home and go to sleep. Or I simply just don't get out of bed or off the couch in the first place.

When it come to your weight, it doesn't matter if a women does or does not care. When you look your best, you feel your best. If you love yourself, you will work hard and get yourself in shape.

Then again it easy for me to say that cause I don't get fat, but I too have been way less fit than when I was in college.

I wish you the best!
 
Normally, I would prefer Determination over Motivation :D
No one owe you anything my friend! So be independent and get what you want. This is life, people don't come to you if you don't go to them. Success won't come to you if you have no effort.

Don't find motivation, just BE DETERMINE! :D
Our generations these days are lack of 'stamina' they often find motivation rather than being determine themselves, but it's not wrong, sometimes you just got to have a balance of both. If you can't find motivation to motivate you to move, then choose the alternative path by being determine and move yourself! In the end, you'll learn new things ;)

Don't let your thoughts run your life, don't think so much, some times thinking too much is bad, you just get worried and then depressed, control your thoughts, don't let them run wild.

In the end, just be positive, when you are optimistic, you tend to see many things differently and also in the positive manner which brighten up your day!! :D
 
Motivation is a great word for losing weight. If you are motivated you can do this more than your goal. You must instill in your mind that enable to achieve a goal you must work for it. And whatever challenge you undergo you will stand against it. It is inappropriate to give up. And you may not know that you almost near to your goal. So keep on achieving your goal. Look at the improvement that you do and the more that you become motivated to accomplish you goal. You find that hard work is worthwhile. Never give up. If others have tried to slim down it must also be applicable to you. And science has many solutions to weight loss.

*promotion removed*
 
I suppose you could put some down to sleep, if I get the "right" amount of sleep, I seem to wake up with more motivation. Although I'm fussy when it comes to sleep, too much an I feel lazy and tired, too little and I feel drained and weak.
 
some times I find myself oscillating between the things that I don't want (I don't want to be less attractive, I don't want to be ignored by the opposite sex, I don't want to look in the mirror and see a fat face) and the things I do want (I want to feel lighter, I want to wear all those nice clothes that don't fit anymore)

it is very strange that at some point I realized that some things that I was supposed to want, like seeing a more attractive face in the mirror (I gain weight on the face, many others can be overweight and still look great), I didn't REALLY, TRULY want , for example if I liked my face in the mirror then I would start eating again because I was in fact afraid of being (a bit more) attractive.

So I guess before finding motivation, you have to find your TRUE motivation both for doing and for not doing, that means asking yourself why you stay in bed, what you are afraid of, what you are trying to avoid and what you really want. In a nutshell.
 
Watch Pumping Iron to motivate yourself. Works for me after taking long breaks from working out :D
 
Punisher said:
Watch Pumping Iron to motivate yourself. Works for me after taking long breaks from working out :D

Wouldn't work for me, I'd just stare at the TV thinking "Wish I had the motivation for that".

Wow I sound lazy, meh.
 
9006 said:
Punisher said:
Watch Pumping Iron to motivate yourself. Works for me after taking long breaks from working out :D

Wouldn't work for me, I'd just stare at the TV thinking "Wish I had the motivation for that".

Wow I sound lazy, meh.

Lol should try it. I'm lazy and don't do anything, but it still works for me :D

I lost over half of my body weight in 5 months after randomly buying a fitness magazine with The Rock on the cover.
 
Sometimes you just have to fake motivation. Just go do it anyway. Don't wait for inspiration, get busy with perspiration. If i waited for motivation to do things, it probably isn't going to happen. But, that's ok. I don't have to let that stop me. And, much of the time, if i just force myself to go to the gym or whatever, after i get there and get going, i am fine.
 
Punisher said:
Lol should try it. I'm lazy and don't do anything, but it still works for me :D

I lost over half of my body weight in 5 months after randomly buying a fitness magazine with The Rock on the cover.

I used to actually go the gym, but it was back when I had a stable job things which I didn't appreciate.
 
Well, what's the alternative? To give up power over my own situation would be terrifying. Being helpless is one of my greatest fears.
 

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