It's a small world

My friends have all gone. One way of another they disappear from my life. They did a way out and they take it.

Is there something wrong with me?

My world is shrinking and I don't know how to cope

You shouldn't question yourself if you're unsure. Maybe they've just moved on "in life" and you haven't... it happens, it's normal that some people end up getting left behind; whatever the reason. I know that's not gonna make you feel better thinking about that, but I very much doubt that it's you. So at least you can take a positive from that, ironically. :-\

Nocebo said:

My friends have all gone. One way of another they disappear from my life. They did a way out and they take it.

Is there something wrong with me?

My world is shrinking and I don't know how to cope

Click to expand...

Sometimes... People move on. Don't assume that just because your friends aren't talking to you RIGHT NOW means they've completely moved on. Sometimes things are going on in their lives and they need some time alone... Or they've met some new friends, and are spending some time with them.

If they're really friends; they'll come back to you.
If they don't come back to them, were they really good friends? You're better off without.

There is nothing wrong with you though, and don't ever think that there is. Regardless of the circumstances, you've done only what you thought you knew how and you can't be faulted for that.

If your world is shrinking, open it up. Find some hobbies, do things that you enjoy, and do it with other people. Find groups of people that enjoy doing the same thing as you and you'll find that your world starts to open up.

Sometimes people grow apart, especially if you met them in school or college. You had your fun back then, but remember that a huge part of it was because you saw them every day and they all lived close to you. As we grow up and leave the family nest, our priorities in life change and we are bound to fall apart with most of the people we knew in school. Like Ignis said, finding new friends that fit your current mold of life may prove better for you in the long run than wasting your time and energy chasing old friends who may not feel the same way about it anyway.

I left school a loooon time ago I had one fried whom I stayed in contact with, I moved on and away and he couldn't cope. We managed to pick things back up but then he got married and that was that really. Promises of visiting broken and constant excuses why he hasn't written or even just sent a text once a month. I really don't ask for a lot.

Iv been where I am for a few years now. I have been regularly going to 5 different groups for the past three years here. But I only saw 2 people outside of those groups. One of those people constantly invites me for a night out to cheer me up and then gets drunk, finds a man and goes off with him...I can't go out with her again, she doesn't understand.

I'm trying hard. I volunteer in four other places too. I'm chatty and approachable. I just dont know what im doing so wrong. I'm a stay at home mum of three (my oldest is nearly 12)

Seriously. Without sounding crazy (because I know it does) is there something about me that people don't like??

I also have a pen friend of almost 15 years that has gone a bit AWOL. I et excuses there too. He's going through a tough time. But again. A quick txt wouldn't go amiss & don't think it's an unfair expectation x

It is hard to have to establish a circle of friends from scratch. And worrying that there is something wrong with you makes it harder. Like you, I go out to different groups, but friendships outside of the times I am in the groups are virtually non existent.
I wouldn't go out with that woman you mentioned again as it sounds as though she is using you to give her the courage to go out and pick up a man as she doesn't want to go on her own.
What about the mothers of your children's friends? Are any of them stay at home mums as well? Maybe you could find a friend there.

like every one else has said.. its not right to think that you are the reason.

a few things came to my mind when i read your post and the responses... what you are looking for is a real friend, but the places you are going to find friends usually do not have people that are looking for a real friend. though im not saying its impossible.. but the chances are low..

its like finding a quality partner at a bar/club. not that you cant find them.. but people that go to bars/clubs usually arent there for the chance of finding/being a quality partner (usually one night stands/having a good time/shoot the breeze/oh, i have to go back to life tomorrow). looking for them (real friends) at volunteer/community events are kinda the same.. i wont say its impossible.. just that your chances are slim.

and -just- in case (none of us are perfect)... lets just say i cant make friends because i have anger issues.. im very unstable. so is that my responsibility to change or other people's to accept me "for who i am"? be it blunt, unempathetic, obnoxious, dramatic, gossiping, overly sarcastic, or badmouthing etc. there are things probably any of us a can improve on.

There is nothing wrong with you, sometimes life just happens that way. The most I keep in touch with my old friends is on facebook and that is rare. They all have their own lives and careers and stuff going on, people tend to drift apart, and sometimes they come back together over time.

Another post I really relate to!

Ditto on people disappearing from my life, and ditto on the man hungry friend :club:

I know other people drift away from friends, but I was ripped away when I was moved across country. It seems the ones who stayed put and drifted naturally - off to university/jobs/other friends etc don't question it. Because it was out of my control and so final, I am left spinning. Even after 23 years.

I didn't get to drift merrily away, spinning into new orbits of life, work, friends. I can't go anywhere to meet any now either. But I do worry I am fundamentally unlike-able.

You don't come across as there being anything wrong with you. Of course it's hard to tell online Maybe it's not us. Maybe it's them.