How public speaking really helped me to get rid of my shyness

Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum

Help Support Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.

Spy

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 14, 2014
Messages
91
Reaction score
0
Hi!

Like I said in my introduction thread, I was very shy when I was a kid. It was worst when I was a teenager. Bullying didn't helped me.

But about 15 years ago, I started to work in a museum. I worked as a guide and I had to do lots of public speaking. I had every group you can imagine (kids, teens, adults, families, elderlies, immigrants, tourists ...). And I had to do this public speaking in two languages.

By talking to them every day I started to build my self-confidence and my self-esteem. Eventually, I started to make jokes with people and I discovered that they were laughing at my jokes and not about me.

If you are shy, my best tip is to force you to take a job at public speaking. It's hard, very hard at the beginning but with the time and effort, it will help you a lot.
 
I've been in customer service for about that long, still hasn't helped me with public speaking. I can talk customers ears off too you wouldn't know I was a shy person, but outside of that, hell no.
 
Get me in the right context, and I can talk your ear off. This is usually when I feel like I have control in the conversation. If I mention that I'm shy during these periods, those people say, "No you aren't."

Get me in a situation where I feel powerless, such as a conversation about football or something I have nothing to add to, and I become really, really withdrawn and quiet.
 
Are there other members that have a fear of speaking in front of a public or had succeed to get ride of this fear like me?
 
I'm still struggling with my public speaking issues. Public speaking at work is always a source of anxiety and discomfort for me..

I know I need to get some classes or help with improving, but have always stopped short of committing to that.
 
I think that Toastmasters should be able to help you. Give it a try and tell me how you are doing. The only tip I can tell you is that you have to practice, practice and practice again. I was very shy when in my teen years but now I am a lot more confident and I can speak to almost anybody except a cute girl I'm attracted to.
 
Sci-Fi said:
I've been in customer service for about that long, still hasn't helped me with public speaking. I can talk customers ears off too you wouldn't know I was a shy person, but outside of that, hell no.

same here. I am very talkative at work with customers and staff. Outside work I am quiet and shy.

I think I am a somebody at work because I am wearing a uniform. If I went into a pub tomorrow night, people wouldn't notice me. I would sit there all night and nobody would be interested in talking to me. At work the uniform and the fact that customers come to me to get serve gives me the opportunity to interact with them. I am funny and interesting when I get the chance. Away from work I don't get the chance, there is nothing remarkable about me, people aren't interested. It was horrible finding out but it's true !
 
In high school I was in FFA, and we had speech competitions. That really helped me with my shyness, and also the opportunities I had to teach elementary school kids about dogs through that.
 
What really helped me with public speaking is this: the realization that the audience isn't judging me because they don't really care. They're probably not even paying attention, they're probably thinking about what they are going to do after class, they probably just want to go home (I was in school when I made this realization). Then I figured, I'll just give this speech my best effort so I can get the best grade for it, and put it behind me.
 
LeaningIntoTheMuse said:
Get me in the right context, and I can talk your ear off. This is usually when I feel like I have control in the conversation. If I mention that I'm shy during these periods, those people say, "No you aren't."

Get me in a situation where I feel powerless, such as a conversation about football or something I have nothing to add to, and I become really, really withdrawn and quiet.

This. Yes. :(


Spy said:
Are there other members that have a fear of speaking in front of a public or had succeed to get ride of this fear like me?

I don't know if my problem is so much speaking to groups of people, but rather speaking to groups of STRANGERS. I have been told that I am a good conversationalist and some people don't even seem to know that I am shy... which seems kind of weird to me. I just can't easily bring myself to actually begin talking to stangers because I just feel like it's not my place and that I shouldn't be doing it. Maybe it's a low self-esteem thing?
 
Last time I had to speak in front of anyone was at my grandmother's funeral. It was an emotional time so I wasn't honestly thinking what other people were thinking of me at the moment. I just went up there, said what I had to say and than sat back down again. In the end everyone ended up telling me what a beautiful job I did. =)
 

Latest posts

Back
Top