Being nice to strangers?

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Revanchist

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Today I had a thought, what if I directly and openly told people when I liked something about them. Would that be considered rude? I mean yeah okay there are lines where it's just ridiculous however what if I clearly see someone that has worked on something like, I don't know a hair style or if I see someone with unique piece of clothing on... would it be awkward to say

"Hey...I think that's really cool" or " I like your etc.etc."

Surely to me it would seem because I am the one who's saying it and expecting a person to act awkward but what would you do if someone randomely said you had something cool on, or that you looked good etc.

I was traveling with my mother in another country and we were on our way home and we decided to sit down for some coffee and ice cream. And the woman that was serving us was staring at my right leg for a few seconds. I had zippers on that leg of the jeans, like six zippers divided up to my thigh. They could be unzipped and i figured it would be unique to have the zippers there. So she was like, hey that's really cool, I really like it. I was really happy that someone noticed and openly said something about something that I personally decided to do with a piece of clothing. Surely yeah i gave it to the tailor but i had the idea for it.

What do you think, would being randomely nice make the strangers think about doing the same thing? Because this woman has said this compliment to me and ever since I've been thinking about doing the same thing and openly telling people HEY:....i like your haircut. or...HEY....those are some cool glasses.


Thoughts? Have you ever recieved a random compliment or gave one?
 
There is nothing wrong with randomly giving someone a compliment. People have actually gone out and done this, you can find videos of it. You might get some weird looks or comments because you are strangers so be prepared for that. But a random kind comment from a stranger can go a long way in lifting someones spirits, more so than from someone you know. Even just a friendly smile (friendly, not perverted or crazy lol) with a hello can really make a difference, or holding a door open for someone.

I've had good and bad. The bad wasn't so bad as rude. I was in high school and had no classes all morning, but had to take the bus to school. So each morning after I visited with my friends and the class bell rang, I would go for a walk. There was this lady downtown one day trying to get signatures for something, I don't remember what for now. She asked if I didn't have any friends cause I was alone. I told her they were in school and I didn't have classes. She then told me to get some friends. This was after I signed her petition. I wanted to scratch my name off it and rewrite, this woman is a *****.

I've had random compliments from strangers, they liked my jacket, or shirt, or just said hello with a kind smile. There were these two little boys with their mother in at a mall one time, they were ahead of us going out. The youngest boy held the door open for me and my brother, and not to be outdone by his little brother the older boy held the next door open. Their mother looked so proud of her boys, she taught them well. Even something like that made me smile and feel better.
 
Sci-Fi said:
There is nothing wrong with randomly giving someone a compliment. People have actually gone out and done this, you can find videos of it. You might get some weird looks or comments because you are strangers so be prepared for that. But a random kind comment from a stranger can go a long way in lifting someones spirits, more so than from someone you know. Even just a friendly smile (friendly, not perverted or crazy lol) with a hello can really make a difference, or holding a door open for someone.

I've had good and bad. The bad wasn't so bad as rude. I was in high school and had no classes all morning, but had to take the bus to school. So each morning after I visited with my friends and the class bell rang, I would go for a walk. There was this lady downtown one day trying to get signatures for something, I don't remember what for now. She asked if I didn't have any friends cause I was alone. I told her they were in school and I didn't have classes. She then told me to get some friends. This was after I signed her petition. I wanted to scratch my name off it and rewrite, this woman is a *****.

I've had random compliments from strangers, they liked my jacket, or shirt, or just said hello with a kind smile. There were these two little boys with their mother in at a mall one time, they were ahead of us going out. The youngest boy held the door open for me and my brother, and not to be outdone by his little brother the older boy held the next door open. Their mother looked so proud of her boys, she taught them well. Even something like that made me smile and feel better.

...**** *****. Where I'm from it's extremely rare for people to be directly nice. Smiles are exchanged and all that however I never saw anyone directly compliment another. I don't know, I might give it a shot and see how it goes.

P.S. Loved the reply. Unlike many others that say " yeah...aha...sure.." :)
 
I do this all the time..."Gee, that's a lovely dress you're wearing," or compliment someone on a piece of clothing or a particular hairstyle or even something I may have overhead them say. I've also had perfect strangers compliment me. I've never really questioned whether or not this might seem awkward, I've always just thought it's a nice thing to do. I know when it happens to me, it's something I smile about for the rest of the day...:)
 
That's a lovely thing to do - you definitely shouldn't feel bad about it! I guess what sometimes might come off as rudeness is more somebody being taken unawares when a stranger says something to her, especially in a big city (in London nobody ever talks to strangers, so if somebody starts talking to you it takes a moment for you to realise what's happened. But if somebody implemented me on the street I know I'd be really happy about it :)
 
ringwood said:
I do this all the time..."Gee, that's a lovely dress you're wearing," or compliment someone on a piece of clothing or a particular hairstyle or even something I may have overhead them say. I've also had perfect strangers compliment me. I've never really questioned whether or not this might seem awkward, I've always just thought it's a nice thing to do. I know when it happens to me, it's something I smile about for the rest of the day...:)

Thats really nice :D I think i just might go ahead and see how it goes. The worst thing that can happen really is just getting a weird look haha

GirlwithCuriousHair said:
That's a lovely thing to do - you definitely shouldn't feel bad about it! I guess what sometimes might come off as rudeness is more somebody being taken unawares when a stranger says something to her, especially in a big city (in London nobody ever talks to strangers, so if somebody starts talking to you it takes a moment for you to realise what's happened. But if somebody implemented me on the street I know I'd be really happy about it :)

Me too! I really would be taken off guard but I think that's really a ncie thing to hear. It just gets awkward when you run into a person who doesn't know how to take a compliment but I think in general it will be a nice experience
 
There's generally a stupid stigma when it's a guy/guy doing it, kinda like "Whoa guys don't do that" which I find bullshit since it seems like such neanderthal type behavior; kind like a guy trying to stare you out if you happen to glance in his direction. And in some cases women assume that you're simply trying to chat them up if a guy starts a random conversation like that, then you're labelled as "creepy"... or whatever.

Personally I do not see any problem with starting a pleasant conversation with someone in real life, though there are only a select few members of society I would do this with because of the 'modern' attitude some people may have described above.
 
I do this sometimes. As Sci suggested, I have gotten weird looks and comments, sometimes even cruel ones; but I think the awkward ones were usually because they just weren't expecting it. In general I think it makes people feel good. I don't think it's rude, as long as you're not aggressive about it and don't do things that would normally be rude anyway, like interrupting someone in the middle of a conversation or something.

As for getting compliments from strangers, that doesn't happen to me much.
 
I love giving compliments. Any compliments I have received have revolved around my children. But that's ok with me.
There have been a couple people who have approached me in a fast-paced, more aggressive manner. But their words were very kind. Took me a second to warm up to that.
 
Random compliments are always so nice, especially from strangers! Not getting them often though... And I always try to find positive things from people but usually too shy to tell any compliments to any strangers.
 
lonelyfairy said:
Random compliments are always so nice, especially from strangers! Not getting them often though... And I always try to find positive things from people but usually too shy to tell any compliments to any strangers.

Yes! Same here, like I'm too shy. And Im quite afraid that a compliment might come off as me hitting on people. Especially if it's a compliment to the same gender, then its like...what in the hell? cause i live in a very straight society sadly lol
 
Revanchist said:
Today I had a thought, what if I directly and openly told people when I liked something about them. Would that be considered rude? I mean yeah okay there are lines where it's just ridiculous however what if I clearly see someone that has worked on something like, I don't know a hair style or if I see someone with unique piece of clothing on... would it be awkward to say

"Hey...I think that's really cool" or " I like your etc.etc."

Surely to me it would seem because I am the one who's saying it and expecting a person to act awkward but what would you do if someone randomely said you had something cool on, or that you looked good etc.

I was traveling with my mother in another country and we were on our way home and we decided to sit down for some coffee and ice cream. And the woman that was serving us was staring at my right leg for a few seconds. I had zippers on that leg of the jeans, like six zippers divided up to my thigh. They could be unzipped and i figured it would be unique to have the zippers there. So she was like, hey that's really cool, I really like it. I was really happy that someone noticed and openly said something about something that I personally decided to do with a piece of clothing. Surely yeah i gave it to the tailor but i had the idea for it.

What do you think, would being randomely nice make the strangers think about doing the same thing? Because this woman has said this compliment to me and ever since I've been thinking about doing the same thing and openly telling people HEY:....i like your haircut. or...HEY....those are some cool glasses.


Thoughts? Have you ever recieved a random compliment or gave one?

Just be yourself .
 
Have at it, but if you live in the US here's some advice: If you're going to compliment a woman for something & she's never seen you before, keep it above the neckline of her shirt/blouse/etc. Usually if you compliment a woman on what she's wearing, she'll take it to mean that you're checking out her body. She might like it or she might not. (Yes, I look too....but I don't need to notify her about it.) When complimenting a female in the States, stick to safe territory, like her hair or eyes, or whatever she's reading if she has a book with her.
 
MTrip said:
Have at it, but if you live in the US here's some advice: If you're going to compliment a woman for something & she's never seen you before, keep it above the neckline of her shirt/blouse/etc. Usually if you compliment a woman on what she's wearing, she'll take it to mean that you're checking out her body. She might like it or she might not. (Yes, I look too....but I don't need to notify her about it.) When complimenting a female in the States, stick to safe territory, like her hair or eyes, or whatever she's reading if she has a book with her.

Quite a confusing thing isn't it... how complimenting someone's body can be percieved as an insult. Makes no sense according to any logic but yet so many women do get offended.
 
Revanchist said:
lonelyfairy said:
Random compliments are always so nice, especially from strangers! Not getting them often though... And I always try to find positive things from people but usually too shy to tell any compliments to any strangers.

Yes! Same here, like I'm too shy. And Im quite afraid that a compliment might come off as me hitting on people. Especially if it's a compliment to the same gender, then its like...what in the hell? cause i live in a very straight society sadly lol

The easiest way I make it through eight hours of being a checker is by drinking a Rehab Mega-Monster Tea so when you're at the 2-3 energy drink mark it becomes pretty easy to tell people the nice things you think about them. I complimented the color of someones dress yesterday because it was a very beautiful shade of purple and frequently comment on peoples hairstyles if I really like them. Typically people really perk up hearing something nice about themselves; especially if it's the hair or an outfit because I think people take time putting that stuff together. I usually don't have that sexual gloss with my compliments though so there isn't much to be creeped out by. For all the positive abuse I've dealt I only remember having 1 or 2 people act awkwardly to it but they were young so that's understandable. Doing it, by the way, really helps with your ability to instigate. At least it has with me. And there's nothing to lose being genuinely nice to a stranger IMO.
 
Revanchist said:
MTrip said:
Have at it, but if you live in the US here's some advice: If you're going to compliment a woman for something & she's never seen you before, keep it above the neckline of her shirt/blouse/etc. Usually if you compliment a woman on what she's wearing, she'll take it to mean that you're checking out her body. She might like it or she might not. (Yes, I look too....but I don't need to notify her about it.) When complimenting a female in the States, stick to safe territory, like her hair or eyes, or whatever she's reading if she has a book with her.

Quite a confusing thing isn't it... how complimenting someone's body can be percieved as an insult. Makes no sense according to any logic but yet so many women do get offended.

Holy honeysuckle! That's what I've been doing wrong... Apparently screaming, "Nice Ass" isn't taken as compliment by practically any women? But 95% of men would take it as a compliment & some would even go as far as a sign of women being interested... Try figuring that out...!!!
 
sk66rc said:
Apparently screaming, "Nice Ass" isn't taken as compliment by practically any women? But 95% of men would take it as a compliment & some would even go as far as a sign of women being interested...

I'd be more worried about what sort of butt-stuff the woman was thinking of doing to me. (wary)
 
Badjedidude said:
sk66rc said:
Apparently screaming, "Nice Ass" isn't taken as compliment by practically any women? But 95% of men would take it as a compliment & some would even go as far as a sign of women being interested...

I'd be more worried about what sort of butt-stuff the woman was thinking of doing to me. (wary)

I've always wondered if there's such a thing called "vagina envy"...?!?!
 

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