StonedHitman
Well-known member
So, I haven't been on here in a while, but I just thought I'd come here to vent I guess, because I never vent with my therapist who I've been seeing for like 2 years. Honestly I don't know what I'm doing. I've said this before but I feel I have to say it again because It's pretty much how I'm feeling everyday.
Basically, I'm a loner, loser, I'm 21(22 in september) and I'm sitting here at my desk in my grandmas house eating fried chicken and pizza, watching prom proposal videos on youtube. My self confidence is nonexistent, as are friends, a car, a job, and a girlfriend, of course I'm content with that because me being the way I am, I don't blame any lady for not wanting to be with me.
I have school at least, it's only a trade school but It's actually great. I'm pretty sure I'll just fail at college, I actually went to one for a couple months and just couldn't keep up so I just quit that, like I quit on just about everything. Anyways, I'm taking this cisco networking course, it's 2 semesters long and It's actually going pretty great, my instructor says I'm doing really well, and he tells me I could be the first student he's had to get the CCNA from his class. I mean That would be good If I could get that and look for a job. But I don't know, the test is pretty hard, hopefully I'll pass but if not I wouldn't be surprised.
I have these thoughts like, I was watching a youtube video and in it there was like a group of 5 or 6 friends dancing and singing in a bedroom and that makes me feel pretty depressed and pathetic.
Sometimes I'll go over to my sister's house and chill for a while. She's happily married and has 3 kids, all boys. She's 29. There's also my brother, who is 30 who has a kid on the way, 3 months he said. So both my sister and brother have a nice family and know exactly what they're doing in life, I must be the reject lol.
I think about what it would be like if I had a family of my own someday. Or what it would feel like to fall in love. But hey, a guy can dream. Well, that's pretty much it, I don't usually get to vent so I guess this is good.
Basically, I'm a loner, loser, I'm 21(22 in september) and I'm sitting here at my desk in my grandmas house eating fried chicken and pizza, watching prom proposal videos on youtube. My self confidence is nonexistent, as are friends, a car, a job, and a girlfriend, of course I'm content with that because me being the way I am, I don't blame any lady for not wanting to be with me.
I have school at least, it's only a trade school but It's actually great. I'm pretty sure I'll just fail at college, I actually went to one for a couple months and just couldn't keep up so I just quit that, like I quit on just about everything. Anyways, I'm taking this cisco networking course, it's 2 semesters long and It's actually going pretty great, my instructor says I'm doing really well, and he tells me I could be the first student he's had to get the CCNA from his class. I mean That would be good If I could get that and look for a job. But I don't know, the test is pretty hard, hopefully I'll pass but if not I wouldn't be surprised.
I have these thoughts like, I was watching a youtube video and in it there was like a group of 5 or 6 friends dancing and singing in a bedroom and that makes me feel pretty depressed and pathetic.
Sometimes I'll go over to my sister's house and chill for a while. She's happily married and has 3 kids, all boys. She's 29. There's also my brother, who is 30 who has a kid on the way, 3 months he said. So both my sister and brother have a nice family and know exactly what they're doing in life, I must be the reject lol.
I think about what it would be like if I had a family of my own someday. Or what it would feel like to fall in love. But hey, a guy can dream. Well, that's pretty much it, I don't usually get to vent so I guess this is good.
