Trying the online dating thing....lol

dawningday said:

So here I am, decided to try this online dating stuff. I never done it before and now I have 3 different dating sites that I joined, filled the profile stuff out. Even put a photo of myself, and that was nerve wrecking....lol. But I forced myself.
I have been somewhat reluctant to do this, as I'm a bit old fashioned...meet people through work, night out in a bar etc. But I don't drink, so I don't go out to bars. And meeting someone through work is more seldom these days. So, thought I would give this a try.

So far, I've had about 5 or 6 people wanting to meet me, or winked etc. Now I'm nervous a hell...lol Am I gonna have to act on this now. I was sort of doing this as a test, just to see. As I never thought anyone would be interested in me. I never really liked my appearance and always thought I was unattractive.

As I'm writing this, I'm in the process of this back and forth email thing. She gave me her email address from the dating site. I was reluctant at first...didn't trust, thinking it might be another cam, take my clothes off and give me your money thing. She didn't even have a picture.......she seems like a real, interested person. oh......what to do ...lol

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1. You mentioned that you are a bit reluctant/nervous. Don't let this show in your profile. An example of what NOT to put: "Well, I can't believe I'm resorting to this..." or "I'm a bit nervous about this, but..." This just screams a lack of confidence in yourself. Not that I'm saying that you gotta be confident to the point of being arrogant ass, but show that you are comfortable in your own skin.
2. I don't know what kind of photo you put, but make sure it's a good one. AKA good lighting, make sure you're smiling, a decent hairstyle, nice clothes, etc... make sure it brings out your best features. Also, a few good pictures of you and a few friends won't hurt either, since it shows that you have a social life of sorts.
3. If you message someone, and they repeatedly respond with one-word or one-sentence sentences repeatedly, then honestly you're better off moving on... maybe its just me, but I find one-sided conversations to be irritating and non-productive. Plus, it shows a lack of interest on their part, which is never good.
4. If you do seem to connect with someone (AKA chemistry), don't be afraid of suggesting that you two meet up sometimes in the near future. From this point, several things can happen: first, they can stop messaging you. In a way, this is sorta good, because you can now move on to someone more receptive, rather than waste your time with someone who was probably never going to meet. Second, they can say "Let's continue talking some more before meeting up, I'm a bit nervous, etc...". This is somewhat more ambiguous. You can continue messaging them, but at the same time, start to look for greener pastures, in case the conversation dries up (unfortunately, this can happen at any stage of the process: messaging through the site, texting, after first dates, etc...). Just something you gotta learn to accept as part of the deal. Finally, then can say "Sure!" At which point, just play it by ear

dawningday said:

Well, thanks for all the input everyone.

This was my first time on a dating site, and after meeting this person - I felt that we really connected. She seemed very real, honest and easy to talk to..its been about a week now. She sent photo's and I did the same, she was a bit religious but I didn't mind. She was accepting of me the way I was, being a good person and...just how I am.
Anyways.....lol.....got an email from her this morning, needing money to pay her internet bill. Think she is trying to scam me...lol. And me being the fool, fell for it.
On top of that, its been 8 years since I've been in a relationship and guess....I was a bit lonely, and wanting to find someone to connect with.....well, I'd rather be alone than in the wrong type of relation ship.....lol

I should have posted here before I joined any dating sites, then I could have read everyones warning beforehand. But, at least I confronted her on it......now to see if she responds.

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