Hey,
As I posted in the header, I go to the Social Anxiety Forum regularly (I usually lurk, and post every now and again) and found out about this forum too.
I'm Jeff, 36 and from Long Island, New York. I am not alone; I live with my mom and brother and am very close to them, but I do get lonely. I don't really have any friends, I get along well with most of the people who I work with but on a purely work level, and while I said that I'm close with my mom and brother, I find that it's difficult to be open with them about my feelings and the things that worry and concern me.
At the same time, I feel like I'm bottling things up and every now and then, I end up imploding. Something bad happens, I don't know how to deal with it, so I end up losing it, and yell a lot or drink until I black out (sometimes both).
I think a lot of the problem, personally, is just the monotony of life. I end up doing a lot of the same things day in, and day out. I go to work, come home, just go on the computer or watch TV, and that's pretty much my process. I go to the movies with my brother once a week and volunteer at an animal shelter one day a week, but that's about it.
For awhile, I was going out to the city to go to these things called Meetups, which are gatherings of people who are interested in doing certain things. I never felt like I fit in. Even when I went to a meetup of people who had Social Anxiety Disorder, I felt awkward. Maybe I was tired from traveling such a far distance or not being that familiar with the city, I don't know.
Anyway, I'm not sure how to move forward. I've resigned myself to the fact that I'll never be able to form any meaningful relationships, that I'll never be able to do things that I wanted, like have a career or to travel. Maybe the best way for me to move forward is to meet like-minded people here and participate in some of the discussions here. Thanks.
As I posted in the header, I go to the Social Anxiety Forum regularly (I usually lurk, and post every now and again) and found out about this forum too.
I'm Jeff, 36 and from Long Island, New York. I am not alone; I live with my mom and brother and am very close to them, but I do get lonely. I don't really have any friends, I get along well with most of the people who I work with but on a purely work level, and while I said that I'm close with my mom and brother, I find that it's difficult to be open with them about my feelings and the things that worry and concern me.
At the same time, I feel like I'm bottling things up and every now and then, I end up imploding. Something bad happens, I don't know how to deal with it, so I end up losing it, and yell a lot or drink until I black out (sometimes both).
I think a lot of the problem, personally, is just the monotony of life. I end up doing a lot of the same things day in, and day out. I go to work, come home, just go on the computer or watch TV, and that's pretty much my process. I go to the movies with my brother once a week and volunteer at an animal shelter one day a week, but that's about it.
For awhile, I was going out to the city to go to these things called Meetups, which are gatherings of people who are interested in doing certain things. I never felt like I fit in. Even when I went to a meetup of people who had Social Anxiety Disorder, I felt awkward. Maybe I was tired from traveling such a far distance or not being that familiar with the city, I don't know.
Anyway, I'm not sure how to move forward. I've resigned myself to the fact that I'll never be able to form any meaningful relationships, that I'll never be able to do things that I wanted, like have a career or to travel. Maybe the best way for me to move forward is to meet like-minded people here and participate in some of the discussions here. Thanks.
