Dating sites are pointless.

I hate online dating. I put myself out there and no woman ever responds to my messages. What happened to common courtesy? I wouldn't even care if they just messaged back to say not interested. I'm done with it all.

Jafo said:

I hate online dating. I put myself out there and no woman ever responds to my messages. What happened to common courtesy? I wouldn't even care if they just messaged back to say not interested. I'm done with it all.

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To be fair to these women they probably get a hundred messages a day so they can't respond to everybody.

But you are right don't waste your time or money on online dating. It's for women and good looking men, nobody else.

Online dating isn't all that great for women either once you are past a certain age. We have the same problems as many men face-sending out messages and hearing virtually nothing back.

You are right no reason why they can't write and say Hi.but no thanks. As Tina said I think it affects both genders. I was once for a month a long time ago on a site and I received 3 messages 2 from obvious scammers and 1 from a guy I didn't click with. But I sent some and received nothing back either. Maybe some people are afraid to answer back in case it opens an unwanted dialogue.

Personally I think dating sites are for people with thick skin, and can stand a number of rejections, some people I know have found some gems.

The only messages I ever got were from scammers.
All my messages I sent got ignored. It was money down the drain.

I wouldn't recommend it to anyone, either men or women.
I think singles clubs, meeting face to face are far better.

Online dating is rough.
I'm not fit to date, but when I tried I didn't get it quite as bad as some other men. Response rate was still pretty low, but not literally hundreds of rejected messages.

Talking to a female colleague today, she told me she would not pick a guy if she didn't like his "name".

She-ra said:

Talking to a female colleague today, she told me she would not pick a guy if she didn't like his "name".

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I think that sums up the problem with Internet dating in a nutshell. The process of communication, of getting to know people and building up relationships, has been replaced by this near instant knee jerk reaction of like or dislike. It's a meat market whereby personalities are replaced by tick boxes.

I recently joined okcupid. I think there are problems with it.

First, girl was interesting asked why I never had girlfriend. We ended up kissing on the date. She told me a few days later she didn't think anything would work between us, because I'm still studying (1 year left) and shes career focused. I asked her for the truth and she said that was it. Doesn't seem it.

Second, one was full of compliments told me she fancied me. We clicked really well. Had a good meet. Then on Wednesday she told me she didn't fancy me on the phone. I was like wtf.. she explained she didn't want a relationship right now but she told me face to face that she fancied me and that I was making her horny that day! Only known each other two weeks though. She was full of mixed messages. I think you just got to be careful and look for meaningful relationships. A lot of strange people are attracted to these sites that don't do our confidence much good.

Nobody answers on those sites, when you dont pay you get 'likes' but after you pay for a few months on their site
no one that likes you or when they do you get no answer or message from them at all ...

blazemaster26 said:

Nobody answers on those sites, when you dont pay you get 'likes' but after you pay for a few months on their site
no one that likes you or when they do you get no answer or message from them at all ...

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yes it's all a con, a rip off.
Waste of money.

^ It isn't all a con. Plenty of people have found happiness through them.

Just shouldn't be discounted completely, they are not for people sensitive to rejection.

Yes, sadly the dating sites are scams. When I am paying I never have too many responses but once I stop paying I immediately get an e-mail that I have to pay to see. When I do, it is always some "ringer" who is on there all the time who says "hi" and then I never hear from them again.

Just like a lot on the internet, at first, it was great and pure but now, just a scam.

I found a large part of it depends on what you message too. A simple hey or hello won't do. You need to catch her off guard show you taken an interest in her profile and come up with a flirty, gamey first message.

The good thing I have found about dating sites, at least--if there is a good thing--is you don't need to be a successful, educated, well-paid type, if you're a man. Status is not important.. if you are low status, you can still meet women there.

The trick is to work on your presentation.. the facts and figures don't matter as much as you think. Take good pictures of yourself wearing the right clothing.. smile and/or have a confident expression. Know what to say, when to say it. Being good looking does help, of course, but presentation is more important.

If you can do that part, she won't care if you're a cashier, a janitor, or a part-time teacher's aide, whatever. You'll at least get to meet someone, I guarantee it.

What I fond ironic, funny and somewhat pathetic is that a lot of these women I would message were on multiple dating sites. How desperate are they to find a man? And here I am totally willing to want to get to know them and they don't give me the time of day. Have fun being alone ladies.

The con part is the number of likes, messages and interest when it's obvious a ploy to get you to register and pay money.
I have joined these sites, not wrote anything, not posted a pic and then been bombarded with emails saying some hot blond is interested in me. 'Read her message by joining today'
My junk email folder is full of them.

That's the con !

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Jafo said:

What I fond ironic, funny and somewhat pathetic is that a lot of these women I would message were on multiple dating sites. How desperate are they to find a man? And here I am totally willing to want to get to know them and they don't give me the time of day. Have fun being alone ladies.

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True. That's something some women do. Complain about the shortage of decent men. Of course people like me (and others) aren't good enough for them.

I think you have to look at it kinda like a job application, you need to stand out from the crowd, we get hundreds of job applications per year where I work, do you think that we answer all of them ? Hell no, and I imagine that's the same for dating websites, you message someone, sure they can respond, but chances are they have received 10-20 + messages. Once you start responding to reject people, you are opening the way for a conversation - or worst, opening the way to be insulted for saying "not interested" I guess.

Point is, don't worry about being rejected if you're gonna do that, don't worry about being ignored either. It happens, move on.

She-ra said:

Talking to a female colleague today, she told me she would not pick a guy if she didn't like his "name".

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Just curious, as you put "name" in quotes, was your colleague referring to real names or screen names? Either way it's rather petty criteria, but I can see someone being put off by usernames like "massivecock4u" and "nofeministb1tches" (both of which are real examples of usernames I've seen).

Solivagant said:

She-ra said:

Talking to a female colleague today, she told me she would not pick a guy if she didn't like his "name".

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Just curious, as you put "name" in quotes, was your colleague referring to real names or screen names? Either way it's rather petty criteria, but I can see someone being put off by usernames like "massivecock4u" and "nofeministb1tches" (both of which are real examples of usernames I've seen).

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Yes it is petty in my eyes over what it was. She has been seeing someone and really likes him. She admitted that she would have overlooked him if he had used his real name on the site as she doesn't like it, but by the time she knew it she was smitten enough to get over it. But she has in the past not messaged a guy back if she didn't like the name. :/

Omg those usernames, I wonder if anyone actually ever went there. :/