A guide to making friends (long article)

Hello,

Just put an extensive guide to making friends, online. It's completely free, you can read it here: https://getthefriendsyouwant.com/how-to-make-friends-a-12-step-guide/

I hope it's okay for me to post here - would appreciate you guys' feedback.

Thank you,
- Paul Sanders

Hi Paul,

You know, I've read plenty articles that are of this kind & I must say, I, for one, havent benefited much.

I'm starting to think friendships that are meant to be, will be, when they must. Reason I say this is even if we do go to, for example music theatres in hope to find a friend who has similar interests, we might or might not get along in other aspects, or might not be in the same places in life.

For example, I love arts and decided to visit an art gallery like I do all the time, I met a nice girl I thought i'd be good friends with but she had a lot going on, our lives clashed.

So yes, I'll continue vising these gallaries and other places I find interesting and continue to hope i'll one day make a friend.
Another thing is, opposite doesnt always attract and neither does similar so we get friends in an attraction we cant explain ourselves.

Besides, your journey isnt mine and what works for you might not work for me so these online articles might work only to some certain extent.
But, I personally still try to go out (im introverted) in hope to make friends even though it gets uncomfortable sometimes.

No point in making friends. They'll just hurt you and turn theor back on you. People suck.

Advice books and articles all offer essentially the same pieces of advice phrased differently or with different personal stories attached to them. Either people can intuit it and start making friends once they clear up basic social problems (not listening to others, not showering, never talking to people, etc) or they can't. There's no telling which one, if any, will be the one to give someone momentum.

I've read the entirety of succeedsocially.com over the course of years, several of your articles, numerous others, and all the recommended books from Dale Carnegie and others. Online friends on Skype tell me I look and speak normal. I'm still alone outside of the Internet.

Either you do, or you don't. Knowing the techniques and putting yourself out there only takes someone so far.

Just a quick thought for everybody - don't isolate yourselves. Find something to do that you can do with others. Volunteer in a charity shop, get a Saturday job, holiday job, evening bar job. Start going to church/temple/synagogue/mosque. The less you mix with people, the harder it gets. I've been there! And I'm talking to my younger self, too.

Richmond said:

Start going to church/temple/synagogue/mosque.

Click to expand...

What if you're agnostic/atheist?
As for the volunteering, a good deal of ALL members have tried it and have not had their social needs met. I personally have not volunteered yet, but I know I'm not in the mindset to do so. I need to be helped first before trying to help others. Look. I don't mean to shoot your suggestions down, but don't think all of us haven't tried at least some of these options. Some have found them rewarding, while others have put forth the effort and received nothing back.