Path to loneliness

Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum

Help Support Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.
J

JY

Guest
Hello all. My first post. In my opionion I am an average 40+ guy. Looks, build, intelligence, and so on. I had a plethora of friends most of my life. Had a few good relationships also. Over the years my best friends and others all married and moved away. It was like a mass exodus from the state. Hit me hard and did not see it coming.
The comparing notes on motorcycles and custom cars was long gone now. I had the really nice equipment but nobody that really cared. I left my job in a large company for health reasons. (Job was the cause and I am fine) Lost all repore with coworkers.
Then I was stuck,.....homebound for 6 years caring for my mother suffering from Alzheimer's Disease. It was horrible, heartbreaking, and for that period, there was little getting out, or socializing with others. Most knew of my situation but they were busy living life and had no concern for my need of contact. In 2002 my mom lost the battle. Now I was free! No not quite. I had changed, and was suffering from severe social anxiety disorder SAD. Went to Walmart and just had to get out of there, as i could not cope. This was the norm in my life. I started on Wellibutrin XL and it did indeed help.
For the past few years I have been seeing a beautiful woman who I wanted to believe really loved me, and was into me. Deep down I knew the truth but denied it. I was lonely and she eased that pain greatly. Truth was she was in it for the money. Yes I helped in all ways but got little to nothing in return. But I was paying to stop the pain of loneliness even for moment. It has gotten to a point that she is with this great looking dude now but still wants to "hang out" .........we know why. The terrible pain and suffering of loneliness is killing the zest and wonder of life. I look at everything and everyone with jaded eyes. I go in the garage and look and my modified car. I sit on my customized HD. But there is no thrill. No simple gratification of ownership. I am all alone with the machines. No comparing notes, no ideas and no one who really gives a dam. It is hard for me to make friends with my emotional baggage. Women seem to really like me, but there is a lack of connection with people and words just come to hard. I do cry I will admit it. Watch TV shows and there always seems to be groups of people sharing ideas, possessions and life itself. I understand what most of you are going through. Others will say just get out there and mingle with the masses. six years of isolation has done its damage, they do not know.
Well I hope that some of you find a friend(s) to ease and take away this scourge in life called LONELINESS. I really do.
Brian Wilson wrote: "I was sitting in a forum watching all the people there, all the loneliness in this world...well it's just not fair"
Peace
 
hello sir,i've read your story and I must say you're nearing breaking point.(but not to worry pls. read on)

it's good for you that you are acknowledging your feelings it's a good sign that you wanted this to STOP.(loneliness)that's it let it out,express your feelings by no means.I never knew I was suffering from a severe form of depression when I realized I was actually holding a knife on my abdomen naked in our bathroom,a phonecall stopped me from taking my life and that was how I ended up seeking help.
I've never been really expressive in my feelings for I never knew how to let it out.I went day by day enduring my rage,i suffered small ailments because of this.but being apathetic I dismissed these signs as "all in my head".it all led to that day..

As part of my recuperating process,my doc ordered me to STOP.stop schooling,stop seeing people,stop going places,stop everything and rest.For 3 months I was bedridden,it was like rebooting the whole system,she also gave me medications and it gave me my much needed breathing space.it took me away from pain and I was able to rest.The next 7 months were for theraphy,with two months of actually being left all alone.being solitary made me think how I never wanted to live my life wallowing in self pity and I resolved to try again even with the flaws.

Point is,go seek help,detach yourself from everything that hurts you(it is the only way to fight this)leave if you have to,learn from this experience and live again.Lose the battle but win the war.you can do it.You are the only one who can help yourself,it's up to you if you want to live the rest of your life in pain.I made my choice and i choose to live even if it kills me.

Good luck and God bless.

 
Hi, Mr.

am sorry for your emptiness and loneliness, and i know its hard to reach out again to another in future but i think that though i have been hurt in the past i still move on because the pain of staying in my loneliness is by far greater than the pain of being hurt. you may differ and you are free to but I hop that you will someday understand it.

i know what it means to meet people for the first time but still look at them as suspects who will hurt you, but i have learnt that it's my actions that matter not theirs, that i treated them well with the respect and love that they deserved then.

let yourself enjoy what you have achieved a good way is by volunteer work, you meet people in need and you get to appreciate what you have, the loneliness maybe there but every time you give a genuine smile to another, and look around you and give thanks then the loneliness slowly moves away.

you could try making new friends who don't quiet know you via the internet then you have something to look forward to and someone to share your pain and joy with. well sorry if it is too long and good luck to you, write back whenever you are most welcomed. as they say in spanish hasta luego.
 

Latest posts

Back
Top