Why are most British people so socially cold?

Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum

Help Support Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.
I have known some british people in real life. They did seem more reserved and quiet.
But I wouldn't know, I wasn't there for long enough.
 
I've found Londoners and English people in general to be extremely polite and in possession of great civic pride. It's a nice change from Ireland. :)
 
lifestream said:
I've found Londoners and English people in general to be extremely polite and in possession of of great civic pride. It's a nice change from Ireland. :)

That I noticed too.
 
I don't live in the UK, but I'd have to say the statement in your title is incorrect. London is a big city from my understanding, so naturally, you are going to have more people in a rush and less inclined to stop and be social/nice to you.

This is true EVERYWHERE, not just in the UK. Some people in NYC and Los Angeles and Las Vegas are going to be less polite than in smaller areas or close knit areas. It's all about where you are and what you are doing.

Also, LDRs happen everywhere, just because you don't know about them, doesn't mean they aren't happening
 
I've met some British people and the ones I've met have been very friendly and nice, warm and polite. I found them not as cold as the people around where I live.
 
The population in London is what, about 8 million? What percentage of that would constitute, 'most'?
 
It's probably like that everywhere, and I wouldn't pay attention to Facebook honeysuckle. LDR's do exist despite you not knowing any, but the truth of the matter is that they're known to be difficult so clearly they're not gonna be as popular as a "normal" relationships.
 
Triple Bogey said:
I don't agree with that statement. It's a myth.

This...^ I don't agree either, it's quite a generalization to say that 'most British people are socially cold.' My mum is British, I know lots of people from the UK, and I've never found this at all - as a whole, I find them to be very pleasant, easy-going, polite, witty. Maybe they are not as demonstrative as people from other countries (meaning hugs as greetings, touchy/feely, expressive) and this is what you perceive as socially cold? But again, that's a generalization. Really, the same could be said for any culture/country - depends on context, the individual person's personality, etc...
 
Having lived in Britain for a few years, I have to say the stereotype does sort of prove true, since I have now lived with and can draw comparison against several other cultures. I was astonished when I moved home as an adolescent because people were far more warm and open to touch and hugs and just close relationships in general. I didn't have to be stiff and be afraid that if I wasn't as polite as possible I would offend someone accidentally. As individuals, the people are wonderful, and the British sense of humour is unrivaled in my opinion. But as a whole, Brits tend to be more guarded and far less expressive than a lot of other nationalities and I suppose that does make them collectively come off as being cold and distant.
 
matt4 said:
Discuss..

It's something I observed after living here since birth. More of a problem in London but still same elsewhere. Long distance relationships don't exist here (from one part of the country to the other). My so called friends on facebook are so self absorbed, just interested in tattoos etc. Erm, I'm at a loss to put into words. I will shortly.

What do others living in the UK think? Others that have interacted with British people too?

Before I even clicked on this thread I knew it was going to be a doozy and I want to thank you for coming through..

This has nothing to do with being British. Or French, or Polish or American. It has everything to do with the person. There is someone that I know in here that is from England and she is one of the nicest people you would want to talk to. I should know, she talks to me and I am terrible being social.

For example you can find yourself in a small town in the midwest in the USA. Five hundred people or so in that town. You'll find good people there and socially cold people there. Depends on the person.

If the friends you know are like that it may be time to seek out new friends.
 
I agree with the fact the British sense of humour might have something to do with it. It's very dry and sarcastic which can make people sound cold or cutting. It isn't intended that way though, or at least not most of the time! I think a lot of British people are quite reserved and don't show emotions very much -the phrase 'stiff upper lip' had to come from somewhere! Having said that I actually completely agree that there are people like that scattered all over the world. It doesn't matter where you come from you are going to meet people who are reserved and people who are outgoing. I don't think you can pinpoint that to any particular country even with the stereotypes. As for the long-distance relationships I strongly disagree that they don't exist in Britain.
 
Sorry, I'm just hating on the UK because I'm finding it really crap here. Nothing to see here. Post removed.
 
matt4 said:
Sorry, I'm just hating on the UK because I'm finding it really crap here. Nothing to see here. Post removed.

I think it depends on your location an people you know really.

For example I lived in an area I hated for so long, I knew a lot of people but they weren't really friends or anything; Despite that I used to think they were, but an easy test is when you go through some honeysuckle an they vanish an judge you. Anyway eventually I kinda ditched these people and ultimately moved to a better location. I haven't looked back really.
 
Some are, some aren't. You could as easily say all Americans are brash, arrogant and loud and full of confidence and social charisma, and it wouldn't be true, but that might be the external image some of us see!

I've seen it before that moving to a different country and feeling isolated or crappy, you can project that on to the population as a whole, eg American actors who have come to my city to film have hated it, but it's more to do with it not being home, as much as anything else.
 
BeyondShy said:
matt4 said:
Discuss..

It's something I observed after living here since birth. More of a problem in London but still same elsewhere. Long distance relationships don't exist here (from one part of the country to the other). My so called friends on facebook are so self absorbed, just interested in tattoos etc. Erm, I'm at a loss to put into words. I will shortly.

What do others living in the UK think? Others that have interacted with British people too?

Before I even clicked on this thread I knew it was going to be a doozy and I want to thank you for coming through..

This has nothing to do with being British. Or French, or Polish or American. It has everything to do with the person. There is someone that I know in here that is from England and she is one of the nicest people you would want to talk to. I should know, she talks to me and I am terrible being social.

For example you can find yourself in a small town in the midwest in the USA. Five hundred people or so in that town. You'll find good people there and socially cold people there. Depends on the person.

If the friends you know are like that it may be time to seek out new friends.

Stay out of the thread then. Nobody asked for your opinion did they?


No I was born here just to clear things up. Just people from outside I've often found warmer and friendlier then people from the UK.
 
I am British and I think that one reason why some of us might come across as distant or cold is that we are afraid of imposing or intruding on others, so we hold back. It is shyness/reserve rather than coldness.
 

Latest posts

Back
Top