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Paraiyar

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So I've spent the last three nights in Warsaw and wil be on the train to Vienna in two hours. During this trip I've started to grow in confidence a bit and be more outgoing.

Anyway, while I was sitting in the hostel bar, one of the Polish girls who works in the hostel came up to get a herbal tea. I think to myself "what the hell, she's cute, I may as well ask her how its going." To my surprise, she says "I'll come talk with you in a second" and then proceeds to sit down and full on engage me in conversation

Turns out this girl is not only really pretty, she's intelligent, is doing a degree in Economics and has political views that I relate to and wouldn't have expected. We talk for ages and I ended up sharing her cigarette with her even though I don't smoke (haha).

She decides to go home as her shift is over and she is sick (another reason why I probably should not have shared her ciggy). I strongly believe that if a guy likes a girl then he should tell her to her face or not do it at all so as she goes to walk out I do just this.

At first because of the language barrier, she misunderstood and thought I was saying something else but then she realizes and smiles and hugs me and walks out. Not what I would consider a negative reaction.

Anyway she isn't in at work the next day because of study and wasn't in this morning because of her internship.

At this point I feel pretty frustrated because I've finally met a girl I really like where she seems to like me back and now it's probably going to be a non starter due to external circumstances. I have thought about cutting one of the cities I was planning to go to out and going back to Warsaw later on but I'm worried this might come on to strong for her and I need to know that her interest in me is strong enough for it to be worthwhile. Like a lot of women in Europe she seems pretty focused and pragmatic. I feel like any other girl I might meet in my travels will fall short of her for me and I definitely can't imagine meeting a girl like her in NZ, not knocking Kiwi women, I just don't think they are for me.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble, I don't crush that often but it seems like when I do, I crush quite hard.
 
I'm like that too: "I don't crush that often but it seems like when I do, I crush quite hard." so I (hope I) can understand.

I think it's a good think that you met this girl and had this long talk with her. :) This, regardless of how this whole matter will play out.
It's such a pity that you had to leave so soon... did you manage to get a phone number or some other contact information?

I feel your frustration. However I believe even if this is going to be a non starter, there are plenty of nice, intelligent girls out there. Just keep a positive outlook, like you have managed to do until now, and I'm sure you'll meet others :)

Let us know about any further "news".
 
Yep, got her on Facebook and What's App. Can't even pronounce her real name, no wonder she gave me an abbreviation.
 
Maybe you could send her a friend request on Facebook and see if she responds. (I've never heard of What's App so can't comment on that.) If she responds positively and you both want to meet again, you could change your itinery then.
 
Tiina63 said:
Maybe you could send her a friend request on Facebook and see if she responds. (I've never heard of What's App so can't comment on that.) If she responds positively and you both want to meet again, you could change your itinery then.

Already got her on there, thanks.
 
Regardless of what happens, this has been good. I know now that if someone I consider atttractive and smart can like me then any rejection I face is just a matter of personal preference of that person and not something wrong with me.
 
Paraiyar said:
Regardless of what happens, this has been good. I know now that if someone I consider atttractive and smart can like me then any rejection I face is just a matter of personal preference of that person and not something wrong with me.

That's a good attitude. I wish you the best, however this turns out.
 
Well I told her that I might be able to come back to Warsaw and her reaction was positive which is really good because I'd been feeling a bit down about this.

So things are still touch and go but looking better tha they did before.
 
Well, flights are booked from 13-16. Will let you know how it goes when the time comes.
 
Paraiyar said:
Well, flights are booked from 13-16. Will let you know how it goes when the time comes.

Best of luck to you. And take your time with this.
 
Well that didn't go well. I don't know if it was because she was tired or not but she was really cold with me and friendly with other people. I feel kind of stupid for coming back now. Oh well, nevermind.


I can't make sense of this. Everything seemed so positive and then she just behaved so coldly. I don't know what it is about me that makes my mother's female friends in their 50s-70s think I'm great and make women in my age group so cold and indifferent. It really stings deep down though.
 
honeysuckle, this really hurts. When I went to say goodbye to her because I needed to get out of there, she just looked at me so coldly like I was creep she'd never met before. Maybe I just imagined that she ever liked me at all.
 
Xpendable said:
This is why I fear to have crushes :(

To bad you can't choose not to have one.


Why did she have to be so vindictive? It came out of nowhere? I wish I'd never come back to Warsaw.
 
Am at the airport now. Surprised she hasn't removed me from Facebook considering how she looked at me last night.

Oh well, guess I have NYC to look forward to. Would have loved to have an Eastern European girlfriend though.
 
Paraiyar said:
Well that didn't go well. I don't know if it was because she was tired or not but she was really cold with me and friendly with other people. I feel kind of stupid for coming back now. Oh well, nevermind.


I can't make sense of this. Everything seemed so positive and then she just behaved so coldly. I don't know what it is about me that makes my mother's female friends in their 50s-70s think I'm great and make women in my age group so cold and indifferent. It really stings deep down though.



Your mothers friends probably feel sorry for you a bit.
And women that age look for other things.


Paraiyar said:
honeysuckle, this really hurts. When I went to say goodbye to her because I needed to get out of there, she just looked at me so coldly like I was creep she'd never met before. Maybe I just imagined that she ever liked me at all.

Yes you probably did. She was maybe in a happy mood, that's why she spoke to you for a bit. Don't think you are a creep because you aren't. I went thru so many situations like this. I built my hopes up only to be let down. Women who were nice to me were different the next day. Cold and horrible. I have learned women in general can be in different moods from day to day. They ignore me one day and then look like they want to marry me the next. No reason for it.


Paraiyar said:
Am at the airport now. Surprised she hasn't removed me from Facebook considering how she looked at me last night.

Oh well, guess I have NYC to look forward to. Would have loved to have an Eastern European girlfriend though.

Delete her from your facebook and forget about her. You hardly knew her as well. She could have turned out to be horrible. See it as a something unpleasant you avoided. Just because a woman happens to share a conversation with you, try not to fall for her so hard in the future. Try to be more laid back.
 

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