It seems that this forum has drawn in primarily the adult demographic. While this does make me, a soon-to-be 19-year-old, feel uncomfortable, it's not like I have anything else to do in this very moment.
I am what people would call a NEET. That is, a person who is not in education, employment, or training. I was supposed to apply for tertiary education 2 years ago, but the severity of my skin condition (which specialists still are unsure as to what the cause, and it itself, is) dissuaded me from doing so. This was also supported by my mom. As well as suffering from my elusive skin condition, I also suffer from clinical anxiety and depression, both of which were deemed to be more extreme cases. Ever since I was dumped by my girlfriend of a year a few months ago, I feel as though I've been emotionally dead, incapable of feeling emotions anymore. I wish I could feel again, even if the feelings were negative. After a period of fallout between my ex and I, we are talking again, strictly as friends, but that doesn't help any. I'm still heartbroken, and it's very difficult getting over her when we're still talking and I have nobody else to talk to. Even just looking at the friendship alone, I'm not happy with it. My relationship with her, whether romantic or platonic, has always been rather unfair for me. I always had to do part of her schoolwork for her, and do various other favours, without ever getting anything in return. Most of the fights we had were started by her over the smallest of things, which usually didn't even involve me, or she mistakingly accused me of. Yet out of my own good will, as well as my fear of losing her, I never did anything to hurt her.
I never was lucky with people. Ever since I was a kid, I would make friends only to lose them in a few years because I had to move. As I grew up, mainly through my years of high school and onward, I turned to the internet and looked for friends there. Even on the internet I was unlucky, constantly being ignored no matter the community I joined. Moving on... I started high school in a new area, not knowing anybody, and went through high school still barely knowing anybody and with no friends. I moved often because, besides the regular move, my mom got involved with several men. She and my dad divorced when I was young, and after many years, I now have a step-step-step dad. Even now, the two have been fighting constantly. I'm expecting another separation quite soon.
So here I am, already a no-life, still looking for people to talk to.
I'm a fan of Japanese culture. I enjoy anime, manga, vocaloid, Touhou, etc. I even sing Japanese songs on YouTube. Singing is the only hobby I have at the moment. While I do like to write, I just do not have the motivation to do anything like that. I listen to and/or appreciate music of all genres, though my preference lends towards more aggressive genres like metal and electro. I fancy myself a bit of a brainiac. I love mysteries, puzzles, philosophy, and psychology.
Please don't get the wrong idea by this introductory post. I'm not as much of a downer as I may have portrayed myself to be. I'm usually an up-beat conversationalist who cracks jokes and acts like a cool cat. Yeah.
Hello there!
I am what people would call a NEET. That is, a person who is not in education, employment, or training. I was supposed to apply for tertiary education 2 years ago, but the severity of my skin condition (which specialists still are unsure as to what the cause, and it itself, is) dissuaded me from doing so. This was also supported by my mom. As well as suffering from my elusive skin condition, I also suffer from clinical anxiety and depression, both of which were deemed to be more extreme cases. Ever since I was dumped by my girlfriend of a year a few months ago, I feel as though I've been emotionally dead, incapable of feeling emotions anymore. I wish I could feel again, even if the feelings were negative. After a period of fallout between my ex and I, we are talking again, strictly as friends, but that doesn't help any. I'm still heartbroken, and it's very difficult getting over her when we're still talking and I have nobody else to talk to. Even just looking at the friendship alone, I'm not happy with it. My relationship with her, whether romantic or platonic, has always been rather unfair for me. I always had to do part of her schoolwork for her, and do various other favours, without ever getting anything in return. Most of the fights we had were started by her over the smallest of things, which usually didn't even involve me, or she mistakingly accused me of. Yet out of my own good will, as well as my fear of losing her, I never did anything to hurt her.
I never was lucky with people. Ever since I was a kid, I would make friends only to lose them in a few years because I had to move. As I grew up, mainly through my years of high school and onward, I turned to the internet and looked for friends there. Even on the internet I was unlucky, constantly being ignored no matter the community I joined. Moving on... I started high school in a new area, not knowing anybody, and went through high school still barely knowing anybody and with no friends. I moved often because, besides the regular move, my mom got involved with several men. She and my dad divorced when I was young, and after many years, I now have a step-step-step dad. Even now, the two have been fighting constantly. I'm expecting another separation quite soon.
So here I am, already a no-life, still looking for people to talk to.
I'm a fan of Japanese culture. I enjoy anime, manga, vocaloid, Touhou, etc. I even sing Japanese songs on YouTube. Singing is the only hobby I have at the moment. While I do like to write, I just do not have the motivation to do anything like that. I listen to and/or appreciate music of all genres, though my preference lends towards more aggressive genres like metal and electro. I fancy myself a bit of a brainiac. I love mysteries, puzzles, philosophy, and psychology.
Please don't get the wrong idea by this introductory post. I'm not as much of a downer as I may have portrayed myself to be. I'm usually an up-beat conversationalist who cracks jokes and acts like a cool cat. Yeah.
Hello there!
