msk
New member
Hi everyone. First off I am really new to this stuff. In fact this is the first time EVER that I tried using a chat room or forum of any kind. But my situation is so serious that I have got to try some other source that I did not exhaust already. I have an extremely long story or (nightmare). So long and extensive that I don't know where to begin. I exist in a very lonely and pathetic world. I hate myself so much for how I've lived my life and how I hurt the good people who cared about me. Every sentence that I type I want to throw it all in and slip back into my ugly existence, because no matter how disfunctional it is, it is the one thing that I have mastered. I have a very long history of psychiatric issues and inpatient hosp. stays. Now don't get me wrong, I am not a dangerous guy, in fact I am quite the opposite. I actually love people and animals too. I've been told so many times by wonderful people that I am a really nice and caring guy, but that never stopped me from hating and beating myself up, BUT there's something inside of me that tells me I'm worth it, it may be very small but it is still there. I am so lonely I could bust. There is so much more I could say, but I will refrain on that. I can't even believe I got this far without throwing in the towel. Even though I only scratched the surface of my issues, it kinda makes me feel a little better, knowing I at least got my foot in the door. Any thoughts or help of any kind would be greatly appreciated