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msk

New member
Joined
Jan 30, 2016
Messages
3
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Location
Harrisburg PA
Hi everyone. First off I am really new to this stuff. In fact this is the first time EVER that I tried using a chat room or forum of any kind. But my situation is so serious that I have got to try some other source that I did not exhaust already. I have an extremely long story or (nightmare). So long and extensive that I don't know where to begin. I exist in a very lonely and pathetic world. I hate myself so much for how I've lived my life and how I hurt the good people who cared about me. Every sentence that I type I want to throw it all in and slip back into my ugly existence, because no matter how disfunctional it is, it is the one thing that I have mastered. I have a very long history of psychiatric issues and inpatient hosp. stays. Now don't get me wrong, I am not a dangerous guy, in fact I am quite the opposite. I actually love people and animals too. I've been told so many times by wonderful people that I am a really nice and caring guy, but that never stopped me from hating and beating myself up, BUT there's something inside of me that tells me I'm worth it, it may be very small but it is still there. I am so lonely I could bust. There is so much more I could say, but I will refrain on that. I can't even believe I got this far without throwing in the towel. Even though I only scratched the surface of my issues, it kinda makes me feel a little better, knowing I at least got my foot in the door. Any thoughts or help of any kind would be greatly appreciated
 
Hi msk,
Welcome to the forum. How are you doing at the moment? You mentioned that your situation is serious.
There are many thoughtful and helpful people here on the forum. Many of us have been through a lot in our own lives, maybe even things similar to what you've experienced. I hope you stick around and tell us more about yourself.

-Teresa
 
SofiasMami said:
Hi msk,
Welcome to the forum. How are you doing at the moment? You mentioned that your situation is serious.
There are many thoughtful and helpful people here on the forum. Many of us have been through a lot in our own lives, maybe even things similar to what you've experienced. I hope you stick around and tell us more about yourself.

-Teresa

thanx for your reply: as for this moment I am feeling very awkward because this is so foreign to me. I'm not used to confronting my issues in this manner. I guess it's because I am actually embarrassed about myself. The doctors say I have borderline personality disorder, which explains why my world is and has been in such complete chaos. Boy this is hard! I want to just run and hide my face. But I know that inside I am a good person, even if I don't see that at this moment. I think I'm looking for a spark or any kind of light what so ever to improve my self esteem. This is actually one of the hardest things I've ever done, as far as mentally, mainly because I've been hurting for so long. Ya see, right now I feel kinda self centered. How in the world can I complain when there are so many suffering people in this world that would gladly take my space.
 
Well i dont know if it will help you but think in this world are people suffering from hard diseses like HIV Cancer Leucemy they are invalid blind etc .I feel life in his positive ways at most i am happy that i can live i can see sun i wake up i speak etc .What if i was not be in this life ? Well i hope you get my points be optimistic change this thougts and be grateful for all of this
 
Hey msk, I just wanted to say that you're definitely worth it and that you should keep going forward and take each day at a time. Try to work on what you feel is missing or "weak areas" in your life, even if it means starting from ground zero and that it'll take time, it's okay. We all fall at some point in life and we all drag around in life for periods of time each time, but the most important thing is knowing how to pull yourself back up and still go on despite the negativity you face or the negativity that surrounds you.

There are a lot of threads on the forum where people here have suggested to do if you're feeling lonely. Perhaps you could try some of these out? A lot of people talk about meet up groups or just going out there and doing something and interacting with people. It has got to start somewhere. I wish you the best. Keep us posted on how you do. :)
 
Well i wa had this problem and i can say that this its burried deep inside in you and its a litle dificult to fix it because you must find his source.My solution was a review article found by me at *link removed* and this i found many information and solution to my problem.You see the problem its about our past because we live some very negative thing and thats way we are unhappy
 

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