Possible to find love again?

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Jackus

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Jun 20, 2016
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So I have a son of two who I look after for 4 days a week and then work the rest, do you think its possible to find love even though I have a child already? It just feels like a lost cause for me now.

Like is it even possible to find someone like me attractive enough to look past it?
 
Why would anyone care if you have a kid or not?

OK I can imagine that might make it more difficult to find time to spend time getting to know a future partner but if someone likes you then they like you.

I have not got kids myself but that would not affect how I felt about someone. I hope it would not anyway.
 
A lot of people don't mind if someone already has kids. It wouldn't bother me if they were well-behaved. I'd make sure my own kids, if I had any, were behaved properly as well.
 
From what I got reply wise from people on dating sites, I pretty much have no chance of finding someone that's ok with me having a child already.

It just feels like I am unable to get past a barrier that shouldn't be there in the first place.
 
I have to agree with Yukongirl. In my experience there have not been useful.
I would say there even less useful if your a guy. A lot of them charge you if your a man to use them and the ones that dont have like 20x more men on then women on them.

You should ask yourself something. If there are people out there that would not date someone because they have a kid, and am sure there will be.
But would you really wont to be with someone like that anyway. Its a bit narrow minded thinking along thews terms dont you think?

If I had a kid I would just concentrate on being the best dad I could. Thats gotta look sexy to anyone I would say.
Also you could use the kid to meet singles. Yea know single mums at the park or out side the school gates lol
Am sure the kid wont care if there getting a trip out of it.
 
Bluey said:
I have to agree with Yukongirl. In my experience there have not been useful.
I would say there even less useful if your a guy. A lot of them charge you if your a man to use them and the ones that dont have like 20x more men on then women on them.

You should ask yourself something. If there are people out there that would not date someone because they have a kid, and am sure there will be.
But would you really wont to be with someone like that anyway. Its a bit narrow minded thinking along thews terms dont you think?

If I had a kid I would just concentrate on being the best dad I could. Thats gotta look sexy to anyone I would say.
Also you could use the kid to meet singles. Yea know single mums at the park or out side the school gates lol
Am sure the kid wont care if there getting a trip out of it.

^this exactly, well said Bluey
 
Jackus said:
From what I got reply wise from people on dating sites, I pretty much have no chance of finding someone that's ok with me having a child already.

It just feels like I am unable to get past a barrier that shouldn't be there in the first place.

No, there's a chance. Dating sites aren't realistic when it comes to the average person. Talk to someone who's not into all that, online or in person, and chances are you'll hear that more folks are okay with it. It's only an issue if you make it one.
 
I split up with my Son's Dad 9 years ago now. I have found that a lot of people would date someone with a child. I think the main concern people have about dating someone with a child is how much time you can spend getting to know them but if they like you that much they will arrange time around when you are free and understand.

I've even been approached by men when i've been out with my Son (usually when i'm just out and about shopping) and even dated one of them for a short while,we split up because I wanted to move back to England from Scotland and didn't want to continue the relationship.

There are dating sites that are specifically for single parents,and although I joined one years ago,I didn't like these sites.
 
I agree with Serephina, that the issue is not being able to have the parent partner's full attention. The typical model is to only have eyes for the one you've just fallen in love with. I think when you have a kid, you have to find someone more mature who doesn't need to be the center of attention in the first stages of the relationship. or maybe someone who also has a kid.
 
I don't think it has to do with who's more mature, but with personal choices. In some cases, the most mature thing to do is not to have children.
 
Best way to go about this is to be upfront about your life, and your expectations. If people don't like it, move onto the next.
 
I no longer really believe in it.
I'll believe in it, when it finds me again.
If it finds me again.
But, I'm not going to wait around for it. That's just, fruitless.
 

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