I feel like depression has ruined my ability to talk to people, even in games.

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Tealeaf

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Gaming has been a blessing in terms of making friends. I have these people around me, we try to cheer each other up and spend time together, but I don’t feel like I really know anyone or they really know me.

My friend recently broke up with his girlfriend, and he’s having an incredibly hard time. Sometimes we just play Terraria so he has some company. He tells me things from his childhood that made him so insecure about losing people, and I just… try to be nice about it? I could share my own experiences but I don’t say anything. I don’t ever say anything to anyone. My own feelings are so weird to me.

I don’t know if it’s just depression or my last relationship, where feelings weren’t logical and the facts were all that mattered in conflict. So I learned to shut up about my feelings.
 
Some people are just either more comftrable to tell about themselfs to others, even if they dont know them, or just so dessperate for some one to hear them that they tell strangers about theyre feelings.
I guess tou just want to play the game.
I had some online freinds that we used to play alot... Gaming can be good to find friends.
 
Nicholas said:
Some people are just either more comftrable to tell about themselfs to others, even if they dont know them, or just so dessperate for some one to hear them that they tell strangers about theyre feelings.
I guess tou just want to play the game.
I had some online freinds that we used to play alot... Gaming can be good to find friends.

They're not strangers, though.
 
It sounds like you slowly trained yourself to kind of suppress your feelings in your last relationship. Maybe you just need to consciously try and retrain yourself to the point where you do feel comfortable doing it again.

Maybe try sharing one experience with your friend and see how it goes?
 
Or, if you don't feel comfortable with that, perhaps you could share something with us? I know I care, and you don't know me, and we aren't face to face, perhaps that would be an easier start?
 
Like Paraiyar said. Think of something beforehand and try to share it next time your friend comes over. Doesn't have to be your biggest issue. Just something not to deep you're willing to share. Sort of a practice to learn how to open up again.
Or like Bayou said, open up here first.

Doesn't your friend ask you questions about your wellbeing of previous experiences? Any questions?
 
The next time you have the opportunity, maybe you could ignore that voice that tells you to keep your feelings in and share some character-forming event from your childhood or even that you find it difficult to open up. It's awkward and difficult, I know, but it might help break the pattern. I do hope you can find the right moment, we all need some kind of outlet for our inner struggle.
 
Or maybe you could start by sharing the same things with them that they share with you, even if it is nothing big. Like "Tony" says something about airplanes. I would say, "That is cool, I don't know anything about airplanes." Airplanes are no big deal but you have begun sharing...

Is this making any sense?
 
lifestream said:
The next time you have the opportunity, maybe you could ignore that voice that tells you to keep your feelings in and share some character-forming event from your childhood or even that you find it difficult to open up. It's awkward and difficult, I know, but it might help break the pattern. I do hope you can find the right moment, we all need some kind of outlet for our inner struggle.

Easier said than done. If I could just ignore it, I'd have done so.
 
Tealeaf said:
lifestream said:
The next time you have the opportunity, maybe you could ignore that voice that tells you to keep your feelings in and share some character-forming event from your childhood or even that you find it difficult to open up. It's awkward and difficult, I know, but it might help break the pattern. I do hope you can find the right moment, we all need some kind of outlet for our inner struggle.

Easier said than done. If I could just ignore it, I'd have done so.

Would it help if you kind of wrote down a vague outline of the problem you want to talk about? That way when your brain is trying to stop you from talking about it, you can read off that, almost like a script.
 

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