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Scared of going back on the meds
Went to the docs today and he's decided I'm having a breakdown and has prescribed me anti-depressants again. I have been off my anti depressants for over a year now and I worked so hard to get off them and I know how awful they are to restart. I'm scared they'll make me worse and I won't beable yo start my new job next week, I don't know what to do.

Does anyone have any advice?
What has he put you on exactly? Some you can stop and start without any withdrawals such as that awful head buzzing, if that's what you mean by hard to get off.

If an AD is making you feel bad in any manner (not including withdrawals) then it's not for you or your body chemistry. Request a change if that's the case.
I think you should have a long conversation with your doctor. First of all, why are you concerned about taking them? If you had high blood pressure, you wouldn't think twice. Did you have side effects that bothered you? Nobody wants to take meds for anything if they don't have too.
What is happening in your life that your are having a breakdown or need them again? Can you take a step back and do some things to calm the storm? Starting a new job is a good thing. And, maybe if you have other things draining your energy, you just need to focus on your new job right now and let some other things slide.
You say you worked hard to get off of them.

What did you do? How did you manage the depression and stress and whatnot while you were off of them? What kind of daily routine do you have? Do you exercise?

My point with the million questions is...what can you do to keep the depression at bay that does not involve drugs? There are so many ways you can do it, look into it, Google it, try those options first and if they don't work, you know you tried everything before going back on the drugs you worked so hard to stop taking.
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They have put me on Sertraline 50mg. The last time I started taking it, I had a very difficult month or two as my body adjusted. Bad dreams, sucidial thoughts, emotional out lashes etc once I was through that they are ok but until then it was hellish!

I'm looking forward to starting my new job, unfortunately the pay will only be enough to pay my bills. I literally won't beable to afford to eat for the first 3months. It's a scary thought!
(07-26-2016, 10:39 PM)Nice But Dim Jim Wrote: It's a scary thought!

It is but you can also look at it as an opportunity to figure out how to survive and then know, if you do, that you won't have to be dependent on another job again because you will be able to survive most anything. Having my back up against a wall inspires some great ideas in me, maybe it will with you.

Here is my advice. You don't need drugs. It is completely normal to be freaked out and scared after quitting your job. It is completely normal to have stress. Your not having a break down, your stressed. Stress is good. Drugs make you dependent on them... on your doctor and they some nutty side effects that only make it worse. You need to be clear headed and alert for this new job.

I would recommend that you look to ways of coping with anxiety and fear. One good thing that worked and works for me when I am freaking, is the power of now by Eckhart Tolle. (I am sure he has a website) Really some wise words in there that may calm you right down. Basically his idea is "don't get ahead of yourself" and anticipate. Focus on what is happening right now. And that is it.

Also and this always helps me... basically he says that your brain is different than your mind. Your mind is like your soul and you. Your brain is an endless mess of emotion and stress and negative thoughts that he calls "the ego". If you can learn to recognize that your ego is not you... and you don't have to listen to it, and it means nothing but is thoughts that aren't reality, you will be calm. This always does the trick for me. I just kind of laugh at my ego and say, you are just thoughts. You aren't real. The more associated that your mind is with your ego, the more unhappy you are. But if you disassociate YOU from this ego, it loses its power.

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