Jōkā
Well-known member
- Joined
- Aug 1, 2016
- Messages
- 207
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I have been on this forum for about a week, with minimal engagement outside of the games section. So, I thought I would share a thought that has been troubling me for a few days now.
I believe myself to be a logical person, although, I do of course act against my logic for reasons I can only put down to a weakness of character. I have for a long time worked to improve my character, and I feel like I have improved, but in reality I have not put anything into practice.
A problem I have been facing is approaching or conversing with strangers, whether they be male or female, a problem which many face I am sure. I concluded that small simple steps such as saying good-morning to people I pass in the morning or giving someone a compliment if I see something that I think is deserving of one. I find these acts extremely difficult, almost impossible for me to do, out of some shyness or some form of shame and unworthiness to speak to other people.
Here is where I really struggle, if I need to ask strangers for directions, the time, public transport queries, etc., I can do it with great ease. So why is it so difficult to say a simple 'good morning' or 'I like your hat'. Greeting someone is just polite and complimenting someone is saying something nice to make them feel better about themselves, both of these things cause no harm to any others. Something which makes someone feel better and more valued and causes no harm to any other parties can be considered a good thing and the right thing to do.
So when I say I can not compliment someone or greet them out of shame or some sort of modesty of being unworthy, what I am saying is I am ashamed to do the right thing. This is what has been bothering me lately, it is awfully frightening for me, as for all my faults I have always believed myself to be at least strong in my morals and never afraid to stand up or to do what is right.
On the other hand, to not greet someone or perhaps offer a compliment, life goes on that person has also not done the same for me, so no one was ignored and really no one was harmed.
Still an opportunity to do a nice thing had risen and I chose not to take that opportunity.
How sad, how disappointing...
Any thoughts?
I believe myself to be a logical person, although, I do of course act against my logic for reasons I can only put down to a weakness of character. I have for a long time worked to improve my character, and I feel like I have improved, but in reality I have not put anything into practice.
A problem I have been facing is approaching or conversing with strangers, whether they be male or female, a problem which many face I am sure. I concluded that small simple steps such as saying good-morning to people I pass in the morning or giving someone a compliment if I see something that I think is deserving of one. I find these acts extremely difficult, almost impossible for me to do, out of some shyness or some form of shame and unworthiness to speak to other people.
Here is where I really struggle, if I need to ask strangers for directions, the time, public transport queries, etc., I can do it with great ease. So why is it so difficult to say a simple 'good morning' or 'I like your hat'. Greeting someone is just polite and complimenting someone is saying something nice to make them feel better about themselves, both of these things cause no harm to any others. Something which makes someone feel better and more valued and causes no harm to any other parties can be considered a good thing and the right thing to do.
So when I say I can not compliment someone or greet them out of shame or some sort of modesty of being unworthy, what I am saying is I am ashamed to do the right thing. This is what has been bothering me lately, it is awfully frightening for me, as for all my faults I have always believed myself to be at least strong in my morals and never afraid to stand up or to do what is right.
On the other hand, to not greet someone or perhaps offer a compliment, life goes on that person has also not done the same for me, so no one was ignored and really no one was harmed.
Still an opportunity to do a nice thing had risen and I chose not to take that opportunity.
How sad, how disappointing...
Any thoughts?