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Confronted my toxic family? Now they are coming at my neck
#1
Did I make the wrong choice. I have really bad anxiety and I think it stems from my family issues.


But I been working, sticking with this job and saving money. My siblings who are all decades older than me, and my cousins are older so I've been the youngest and they belittle me a lot.
Well, they love to talk about me when I wasn't doing anything, putting me down and kind of telling me I need to do better. Then I decided to do better on my own and got a job, taking a nursing assistant course that I'm trying my best to get through. I have 2 more weeks left of it. & I will be moving to Philly or NYC for college and a job placement very soon.

My siblings and family belittle me, tell me I will never have kids, tell me I'm not normal, how no one would ever like me, bring up the fact that I was a bum growing up, threaten to tell people about the fact I was depressed and all this other B.S!  & Since it's close to me leaving, I sent a text message to all of them, and it wasn't nasty....it wasn't disrespected, it wasn't degrading or anything. It was just expressing how I am a grown woman, who wants to be treated like one, who wants a life of her own, who want to draw the line and separate. I brought up the things that they always did when I was a child and how they have to stop those things now cause i'm an adult and is 24. I told them how I feel like I was robbed for my life and etc. And I told them how I love them and have so much respect for them all, and wish them the best. But I just want to live my life and go find myself.

Now my aunt is calling my mother and telling her that I sent a hate message out, and my mom was mad and we argued until I showed her the message I sent... and she learned it wasn't a hate message but was still mad that I sent it. She called me out my name and said that no one cares and they're still going to treat me the same anyway. So I just been distant from my mom and we live in the same house. I work early hours, go to my cna training for 5 hours, go to the library and go home really late.
I also tried to avoid the nosey neighbor who I feel is watching and judging me next door, although I might be paranoid I don't know.

But I feel like my family will try to come after me once I leave. I don't feel I am in control.
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#2
Finish the course of education, move away and find a place to live, find a job and then look to more education in your field.  With respect to you, I'd suggest maybe not participating in any more exchanges of friction with your relatives.  If it was me, I'd keep a low profile with them and keep my eyes on my own goals.  There's a lifetime to resolve family issues.  Take care of yourself now.
Contentment comes from within.  Do not seek it from outside yourself.

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#3
Your family sounds pretty awful, to be honest. I think often we can get stuck in a role in a family and the other family members see us in one way which is no longer (and maybe never was) the truth. It is good that you are soon moving away where hopefully you will meet other people who will give you the respect and the acceptance which you deserve.
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