Faking It

How good are you at faking it?  Playing the happy card when you really don't feel like it?  And, trying to be more outgoing when are an introvert.

I'm realy bad at it, I can't fake being happy, but the few times i do go out I try to enjoy it, sometimes it works others it doesn't, being outgoing is hard for my in all occasions.

I am good at faking pretending to be happy as I have a lot of practice. Faking being outgoing I find much, much harder and can only do in very short bursts.

It depends on moods with me. Usually I am pretty good
But if someone or a worker at a place I like going says something that rubs me the wrong way i take that a sign not to go back and distance myself. This can be unhealthy. Because some places I might actually enjoy. I am too senstive like that.

There were cases where i went to a place for years and for whatever reason one day got sick of the people and atmosphere.
In a way that was a good thing. It got dull and stale and needed a change. But subconsciously It might have been to a bad experience I had there a few years before. So in some cases its healthy to change the environment if gets stale. But with me one comment that runs me wrong can do that in a second. I hope some of the people with backgrounds in psychology can chime in here

I could be better at faking happiness if I bothered, but I often toss the happy card into the trash before I have to be among other people. I'll certainly never be able to fake being outgoing.

Rodent said:

I'll certainly never be able to fake being outgoing.

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+1

It's not a difficulty for me to assume a "happy" mode, or even a neutral position. Faking an outgoing persona, though, is another story. I get along with people at work/outside of work just fine, so there's no point in channeling energy towards something that will just cause discomfort for me.

Restless soul said:

It depends on moods with me. Usually I am pretty good
But if someone or a worker at a place I like going says something that rubs me the wrong way i take that a sign not to go back and distance myself. This can be unhealthy. Because some places I might actually enjoy. I am too senstive like that.

There were cases where i went to a place for years and for whatever reason one day got sick of the people and atmosphere.
In a way that was a good thing. It got dull and stale and needed a change. But subconsciously It might have been to a bad experience I had there a few years before. So in some cases its healthy to change the environment if gets stale. But with me one comment that runs me wrong can do that in a second. I hope some of the people with backgrounds in psychology can chime in here

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I get that, my carbattery died on me yesterday,so I went to a garage nearby (not my usuall garage, i was low on gas and this one was near my sisters incase i'd need another jumpstart), so I was polite as I always am, they luckily had a spare for me on hand and were able to change it on the spot.

I'm a happy camper, feeling good about that garage, so I go into the office to pay, I get the bill and it's not that expensive at all, I pull out my bankcard and ask to pin, everything alright and then the guy says "Everything in order, they fell for it again" and gives me a cheesy smile, of weird thing to say but you know, people are weird.

He hands me the bill and receipt and says "here's you proof of good conduct", now i'm like ok... what the fresia is this, i'm not going back there again.

Soon topic, I guess I can also fake being happy quite easily for some occasions, because I just greeted him kindly thanked him and left.

Fake it until you make it As the saying goes

Restless soul said:

Fake it until you make it As the saying goes

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I was thinking the same thing when I saw this thread title.

Depends on how well the person really knows me, a lot people I can fake it pretty good with. Very few can see through it.

dd11 said:

How good are you at faking it?  Playing the happy card when you really don't feel like it?  And, trying to be more outgoing when are an introvert.

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Some situations call for faking it. If I'm down in the dumps on a particular day and a friend announces a new job or that they're engaged, you bet I'll muster up a smile for them.
But I live in the Land of Fakes - fake tans, fake boobs, fake celebrities, fake wealth...so I've probably assimilated a little into that culture, unfortunately lol.

As for trying to be more outgoing when you're an introvert - I don't see much point in that. It would be like expecting an outgoing person to fake being an introvert. I like my introversion and I don't see it as an affliction, it's just a personality trait.

SofiasMami said:

But I live in the Land of Fakes - fake tans, fake boobs, fake celebrities, fake wealth...so I've probably assimilated a little into that culture, unfortunately lol.

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Me too. I assume you're talking about California.

It's shockingly sad how fake this place is.

I've become someone I'm not and never wanted to be.

Somnambulist said:

SofiasMami said:

But I live in the Land of Fakes - fake tans, fake boobs, fake celebrities, fake wealth...so I've probably assimilated a little into that culture, unfortunately lol.

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Me too. I assume you're talking about California.

It's shockingly sad how fake this place is.

I've become someone I'm not and never wanted to be.

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Yep, it's California. And southern California is loads worse than NorCal.

SofiasMami said:

Somnambulist said:

SofiasMami said:

But I live in the Land of Fakes - fake tans, fake boobs, fake celebrities, fake wealth...so I've probably assimilated a little into that culture, unfortunately lol.

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Me too. I assume you're talking about California.

It's shockingly sad how fake this place is.

I've become someone I'm not and never wanted to be.

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Yep, it's California. And southern California is loads worse than NorCal.

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Absolutely !

I was in the SF bay area for 8 years, before I moved to Santa Barbara (now 7 years) ... and yes.

Thank you for proving to me that it's not just me.

I'm bad at faking it. My facial expressions are far too easily readable to my family.

dd11 said:

How good are you at faking it?  Playing the happy card when you really don't feel like it?  And, trying to be more outgoing when are an introvert.

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Don't know if I am any good at it, but I tried to for a long time (all through high school and about 5 years after), and eventually, when I spoke up and said that I wasn't happy, I was told that everyone thought I was happy with the way things were, that I liked being alone, single, and having no friends. When they found out I didn't like being like that, they got all shitty and I suddenly became a liar, and a fake. In the end, it was everyone else who was comfortable with me being lonely .... 

Plus, the way I see it now, it's ... well, how do you feel when you find out someone has been lying to you? Because that's what you're doing. Not a great way to start a friendship or a relationship.

Cucuboth said:

Don't know if I am any good at it, but I tried to for a long time (all through high school and about 5 years after), and eventually, when I spoke up and said that I wasn't happy, I was told that everyone thought I was happy with the way things were, that I liked being alone, single, and having no friends. [...]

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Who is 'everyone' and why do they matter? 

Also, what business is it of theirs whether or not you're happy - they're not your friends.

These people assumed you were happy in your situation.

Personal loneliness is difficult to discuss among friends, let alone with anyone else. 

It's understandable that you let them believe you were ok.

I cannot fake it at all. I do try, but not to try and deceive other people but to try and fool myself into thinking everything is okay. Even if I try it's usually obvious that I feel down. I guess it's hard to fake it when you can't really smile anymore.

I find I fake it alot, one to get me through whatever and also because I find people don't really want to know whats bothering you or help you. They would just prefer to happy me.

dd11 said:

How good are you at faking it?  Playing the happy card when you really don't feel like it?  And, trying to be more outgoing when are an introvert.

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I think this is an excellent question. I'm not that good at faking it and as far as trying to be more outgoing, that just isn't me. I know it's my fault because I think I am someone that is worth knowing.