Finding the right work/life balance

I've been working 12 hour shifts for years, but in this last year the hours have been getting to me. I work a week of days 7am - 7pm and a week of nights vice-versa, always Monday ~ Thursdays which means I get the weekends off. On days its 3 days off and nights 2 and a half (Not counting sleeping time).

During the week I don't have time to do anything other than sleep and prepare for my next days work, but on my days off I just feel like I'm wasting time no matter what I do, instead of being able to enjoy my time off and do whatever I want I never feel like it's time well used. I think how I could be doing something better. For example I used to have a hobby of programming, or going to the Snooker club with a few friends and family, but if I do either of these things I'm constantly clock watching thinking about stopping or leaving earlier to do something else.

It also gets me down thinking about how difficult it would be to have a relationship with this situation, in fact come to think of it I havent had one for years since being in this job. It doesn't bother me much being single but unless I lived with that person it wouldn't be a great relationship just seeing someone twice a week, but again this would take away time from doing something else I enjoy... the cycle continues.

When I explain this to some people they're like "WHOA dude you get a 3 day weekend an only work 4 days!!" but they don't understand the demand of it, I'd MUCH rather work normal 8 hours a day/5 days a week AND get 2 days off on the weekends. I've been looking for other jobs but all the jobs available for what I do are the same hours, it saddens me that these shifts are wideley used and accepted but people are that desperate for a job that they work them and just get on with it, almost like slavery.

I have worked a lot of shift work. Nights, weekends, holidays, second shift, rotating shifts and on and on. 12 hr shifts can be pretty grueling so i understand. However, i think you are using that as excuse. I have worked those shifts, gotten off of work, then went and did other things in the evening. You can if you choose too. And, you certainly can on the days you are off.
I think you need to do a bit of planning. Life isn't just going to happen by chance. On some of your work days, come home and maybe go out for a half hour walk. Or do something creative for a bit like play a guitar, bake some cookies, etc.
On the weekends, sounds like you just need to do some planning. I don't know what you like to do. But make some plans. Be it to get up and go exercise in the morning or going antiquing or whatever. If you just add a bit more discipline of setting some things up for yourself, i think you can work that out fairly easily.

I can relate to this, as I work 11 hour shifts 4 nights a week. I work overnights, and commute for an hour a day. On work days I don't have time to do anything other than eat and maybe watch an episode of a TV show before I go to bed. If I need to make an appointment during the day, it means missing out on sleep, which in turn means being tired at work.

For personal reasons I prefer working 4 days and having 3 off, but I still totally understand how exhausting and unrewarding it can be. 5 Work-day people don't get that you have to make almost every minute count when you work fewer days and longer shifts.

And yeah, that's all you can do right now: Make every minute count. As a previous poster said, do some planning. And more than that, try to enjoy the small things in life, even if that means sitting around and relaxing. You're torturing yourself with thoughts about relationship problems in a relationship that doesn't actually exist, and what else you could be doing with your time. You could always be doing something better. The fact is that this is your life right now, and if you don't find ways to enjoy it you'll drive yourself crazy.

I hope you find a new job with a schedule that you prefer. Your happiness is just as important as your career - perhaps more important. Good luck!